Missing Witches - MW Rx. 12 - Missing Witches Prescription with Risa + Amy

00:00:00.000 The spirit is rising, she's rising, she's rising. The spirit is rising, it's rising, it's rising. The spirit is rising, they're rising, they're rising.

00:00:15.260 Hi, Kevin.

00:00:17.360 Hi, AMZ. Hi, listeners.

00:00:20.200 Hi, Risa.

00:00:21.540 Hi.

00:00:21.840 Let me just tell you all that this happens every time where Risa and I get on, you know, recording, and then we start talking, and then we go, oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

00:00:33.820 We need to add this in.

00:00:37.580 Every time.

00:00:38.540 We have to do some masterful editing or stop and restart.

00:00:42.120 Yeah, because we go from, like, talking about the details of our last, unpacking those things, and eventually it crosses a line where we're like, oh, this is the podcast.

00:00:51.840 i didn't even know this was the podcast today but now i know and we're in it and we didn't set it up

00:00:57.420 at all and we have to fucking restart anyway that just happened yeah but you're with us in this 0.61

00:01:04.000 conversation and here we are so let's get right into it i start this story again okay so i've been 0.84

00:01:13.100 like solo parenting for a couple of days this is and of course like um we all got sick and you know

00:01:21.060 you know it's like we're we're all we're in the mountains we're in the woods we're alone it's like

00:01:27.000 the last time someone called the fire truck it took a half an hour like so I've just been like

00:01:31.140 trying to like manage my own calm and really just listen to the kid and treat her like the teamy

00:01:42.980 that she is and also like repeatedly notice that when she was fucking wilding out or like 0.94

00:01:50.600 just deliberately pushing my buttons or causing shit every time I could be like hey you're not 0.95

00:01:57.800 really acting like yourself are you having some feelings about something and she would be like 0.93

00:02:03.400 yeah actually I'm like I'm really scared for dad or like you know like she it would just she's able

00:02:08.560 to be like oh you're right like yeah I'm just I'm really scared you're gonna get sick and I'm gonna

00:02:14.240 be out here alone like yeah well that's terrifying so that's fair like that's a fair let me let me

00:02:21.000 just put this into a little bit of context so our coven mates don't get scared for you mark

00:02:25.100 is a way for a non-health related yeah you know we're not scared for dad because he's in the

00:02:30.980 hospital or anything we're scared for dad because he's on he's on the road and he's not he's just

00:02:34.940 on the road and she's four and a half and she had this recent intense experience encounter with our

00:02:42.720 all of our mortality when her her grandmother got sick and died in like an intense six-month period

00:02:47.520 so she's like she's very newly aware that people could die and so it kind of comes out so anyway

00:02:54.540 these have been like the dark moments of my soul for the but also so so brilliant to see her just

00:03:00.320 like model for me what's going on with all of us you know like she's just like kicking things

00:03:09.700 causing shit like looking me dead and i'm doing the thing i just asked her not to do like really 0.85

00:03:15.660 just trying to get in trouble but is able to when i'm like oh that's not like you is that is there 0.99

00:03:21.420 a feeling under there to be like yeah there is i'm terrified it's like oh wow that is that's

00:03:28.220 great parenting though for you to translate that so so brilliantly it's like it's all of us that

00:03:34.520 oh that's literally I have to do it with myself all the time like why am I being so short or so

00:03:41.040 you know hypercritical of myself and everyone around me oh I'm terrified it's almost always

00:03:48.560 the answer she's terrified she's four it's moving through her body and then so she's sick she's okay

00:03:58.840 we just have colds we're fine we were gonna we had the plan and this was my other like mantra

00:04:05.500 this week my entire like prescription for myself this week and that I'm sharing with the coven

00:04:10.020 is purely mental it's mental gameplay that God is getting me through I have I don't think I

00:04:16.740 really have songs maybe something will come up but or books or anything it's just all like it's

00:04:21.500 all a head game this week but um the other one was stick with the plan it was like we have a plan

00:04:29.920 stick with the have to pull the rug out under everything I don't have to put everything up

00:04:35.240 into question all the time I'm very much like that I have a plan stick with the plan it's okay

00:04:41.180 we're gonna drive to my mom's that was the plan my first time I only got my license like two years

00:04:47.180 ago and I've driven you know an hour a day picking her up from daycare or whatever on these mountain

00:04:53.340 roads and highways and stuff and I'm like I've had enough practice I did a little hour and a half

00:04:58.200 drive to somebody else's cabin also up north so I'm like I can go into the city I can cross that

00:05:03.460 like Rubicon I can I can get all the way into the city that's the plan I'm sticking with the plan

00:05:08.780 the kid was amazing today she was like so helpful and so excited and excited by the plan and then I

00:05:16.680 got on the zoom with amy i'm here arrived alive i i texted amy um and got on with amy and she was

00:05:23.580 like were there near-death experiences and i started telling her about the red pickup truck

00:05:30.200 squish so for a really long time this red pickup truck was so close behind me on these it's it's a

00:05:37.920 highway a fast highway but it's huge curves around mountains so it's kind of you know you really got

00:05:44.500 to be driving you got to be like actively you know controlling your car so it doesn't careen

00:05:49.360 off a cliff or whatever and this red pickup truck is filling my whole rear view with their lights

00:05:56.220 you know they're just so aggressively close for so long and i was telling amy i had to like

00:06:02.520 choose to narrate that experience to myself as oh like this poor driver is so scared of passing

00:06:12.760 because there's cars going by in the faster lane and like they're obviously terrified otherwise

00:06:18.240 you know they wouldn't just sit there for so long and they don't mean to be intimidating they're

00:06:23.700 just like a big fast truck and they can't get their timing right and they're just

00:06:27.340 ah poor them like so it's a it's a head game and it's narrative like I don't know anything

00:06:33.140 about them they're probably more aggressive than what I'm giving them credit for but it doesn't

00:06:38.160 do me any good in that moment to narrate that person as my enemy in fact it doesn't do me any

00:06:44.780 good in any moment that I've seen like I I can almost always in every experience I've been in

00:06:52.320 dissolve the violence and aggressiveness that I feel from another person by assuming

00:07:00.320 that they are a good person who is perhaps terrified like a four-year-old that there's

00:07:06.820 At some level, they are. And I know that doesn't apply equally across the board. There's some

00:07:11.580 layers of privilege in that, for sure. I've seen like Black co-workers be treated like they're

00:07:18.420 being very aggressive when they were just asking a question. So I think that whole dynamic is really 1.00

00:07:23.300 different when you're being met with aggression that's totally layers of systemic racism coming

00:07:29.240 at you. Like that's a different experience. But for me in this moment of driving, it was really

00:07:34.480 helpful to just make a story about how this ridiculous driver was terrified and then I was

00:07:44.040 scared about people coming on the on-ramp because I haven't really had to deal with that that much 0.72

00:07:48.460 and like just that timing and another red pickup truck came flying like decided they had to get

00:07:55.140 faster than me and the red pickup truck is behind me so I was in a little tight

00:08:00.980 scary red pickup truck sandwich for like 45 seconds but that was finally what made

00:08:08.480 back pickup truck gather the courage to make the switch and get out of the slow lane

00:08:15.440 scared scared fast

00:08:19.160 but I mean that I I spent a lot of time um in my life working in the service industry and that's

00:08:28.680 definitely like a mind trick that I had to play on myself was like this person is treating me

00:08:35.260 shabbily because this service situation is the only time they feel like they have any power in

00:08:41.420 their lives you know and it's not that I didn't go home like shaking you know because somebody was

00:08:47.960 just like so rotten and horrible but yeah it's it's it's healthier for me to say like that person

00:08:55.260 feels powerless and this is the only situation where they can you know cling to any kind of

00:09:00.720 power so they're going to make sure they exercise as much power as they can onto me exactly and for

00:09:07.660 me it's like i'm always looking for the path like a stream you know like i'm looking for the path

00:09:13.340 of least resistance like sometimes i want to cut through shit but i'm really i'm like i don't want

00:09:17.860 to spend my energy unnecessarily. I have cool shit I want to do. I don't want to be spending 0.96

00:09:25.880 my emotional energy on road rage. Like they can all just weave around me. It's fine. I wish them

00:09:34.560 the best. I have other cool shit I got to do. Like off you go, you know, I'm going to get my 0.82

00:09:40.660 kid home and I just it was a real reminder for me also like I felt more confident and more centered

00:09:49.580 and more anchored and this is going to sound weird at first but solo parenting than I often do in

00:09:57.360 team but that's only because I had to you know like I can't let I can't lean on him and like

00:10:10.980 let my fears take up more space when it's just me and her so it kind of teaches me that like I do

00:10:18.740 have I have reserves of control reserves of energy like I have coping you know yeah and you you

00:10:27.360 have ability to make decisions on your own that don't require a consultation you know you can

00:10:33.460 trust your own instincts for sure it's a good exercise i think yeah yeah we certainly get way

00:10:42.040 more shit done when we're together and it's way more fun so you know and i miss him but it is good

00:10:47.880 to be like oh i can just click back into that mode where like mommy's got this don't worry kid 0.98

00:10:55.820 100 i got you i got you down you don't have to worry

00:11:00.500 that's the prescription you said you didn't bring a song but uh agree to disagree uh

00:11:09.540 the song you brought today is man in motion right

00:11:13.100 which is one of the cheesiest songs in the world but i defy you listener go and try this this is

00:11:23.100 the challenge this is not a prescription this is a challenge listen to this song

00:11:28.100 um also known as saying almost fire and i defy you not to feel like inspired

00:11:35.000 like it's so cheesy and at first you're like oh really and then you're like wait a minute

00:11:41.520 i can do anything yeah totally i i mean yeah amy sent it to me when i was trying to pass my

00:11:51.780 driver's test again and I've told this story in longer forms on the podcast and and in the next

00:11:58.060 book and stuff but she was like just the last thing we'd been talking about it it was the next

00:12:02.960 day and she was like song as spell man in motion dance it out it went on the playlist today

00:12:10.260 the playlist was also heavy magic today was good yeah you made a confident driving playlist

00:12:18.540 yeah car power playlist nice yeah it was it was quickly assembled but it definitely had me like

00:12:26.760 distracted enough to be singing loudly and not freaking out yeah I'm even I'm a nervous passenger

00:12:35.520 I just feel like I wasn't meant to go fast right you know I just feel like you know

00:12:42.580 between the tortoise and the hare I'm the tortoise I always get there but you know

00:12:47.880 um so I'm I'm anxious like in moving vehicles like when we know but if there if I can find a

00:12:58.100 song on the radio that I like it's like a respite it's like a bomb like I get three and a half

00:13:03.000 minutes where I'm not thinking about my anxiety about going full throttle in windy mountain roads

00:13:12.800 i'm just thinking about you know whatever song is there and again like this is sort of what we do

00:13:19.360 all the time is like finding finding music that is a balm and certainly if you need like a i can

00:13:26.360 do this then then man in motion click that link totally how are you this week what's getting you

00:13:35.620 through i am like fully i don't remember if it was last week or the week before where i was like

00:13:42.680 i've got one dancing shoe and one like boot of capitalism on my neck and i kind of

00:13:50.440 i'm still carrying that but now i've managed to like

00:13:54.520 bring a poet and an artist into it to bring it all together so my era right now is um william

00:14:06.040 blake songs of innocence and experience so for those of you who haven't heard of it like

00:14:11.780 William Blake was this visionary poet and he also made like um etchings illustrative etchings to go

00:14:20.640 with his work and he had this strange and new process that he used to make his etchings

00:14:26.160 and this process came to him in a dream so you can just take that part set it aside and stick

00:14:32.400 a pin in that part like listen to your dreams you have no idea what what they might have for you

00:14:37.980 but songs of innocence and experience is like two sets of poems and the innocence poems are like

00:14:43.940 tra la la it's spring tweedle dee dee birds and then the songs of experience are like oh the sorrow

00:14:52.540 so it's this set of two poems and and that's where i am i brought two songs today to sort of

00:15:00.360 illustrate songs of innocence and songs of experience because that's where i'm at like i i

00:15:06.220 have created a really beautiful wonderful and privileged bubble of living in the quiet of the

00:15:15.260 woods where things make sense and the birds are chirping and things make sense and coven meetings

00:15:26.400 are like inspiring and beautiful and then songs of experience are when I sort of look over the fence

00:15:34.480 and I look into the world and I'm just like I I don't have the words I guess is the word I'm

00:15:45.420 looking for but I also don't even have like a frame of reference for this feeling of just like

00:15:52.660 every day every day and I I have taken a big step back from the news maybe that's irresponsible but

00:16:00.340 i don't know listeners let me know like i'm struggling with being informed um because i

00:16:07.100 feel like i'm living this like songs of innocence and songs of experience and my ignorance in any

00:16:13.880 situation is absolutely a privilege and so it's not one that i want to indulge too heavily to

00:16:19.440 the point where i don't have an understanding of what's going on in the world um yeah that's

00:16:27.200 where i'm at i'm william blake songs of innocence and experience so the two songs that i

00:16:33.340 brought are vashti bunyan diamond day which is again like

00:16:40.460 and then something that i always return to in my songs of experience is uh kill scott here and the

00:16:51.280 revolution will not be televised like uh i cannot sit down and and watch this happen you know we

00:16:58.620 always say like not nothing what can you do something and obviously this project has been

00:17:03.980 so valuable for me for that that we do a yearly fundraiser plug plug plug yearly fundraiser you

00:17:11.820 know and i feel like in some tiny way i'm contributing to the re-enchantment and you

00:17:17.360 know fairness of the world um so yeah I'm just like trying to enjoy my Vashti Bunyan times when

00:17:25.300 they happen but also like recognize the importance of my Gil Scott Heron too that's where I'm at

00:17:31.960 I think that that's a great piece of advice and prescription is like to weave those times

00:17:37.820 together I was I was showing May like we did a picture of like happy feelings on one side

00:17:43.180 and like what that felt like and then really scared sad feelings on the other side and we

00:17:47.660 were thinking about how like you know we're just these papers like in the wind of time like flipping

00:17:54.080 back and forth going up and down sometimes you get more happy sometimes you get more sad but

00:17:59.360 that's all I don't know I think that's nice I think that's okay also I want you to know

00:18:10.220 that someone in the coven last time we talked about this the the boot of capitalism thought

00:18:15.880 that i said the the heavy boobs of capitalism i saw that your new band name yeah so that's good

00:18:24.440 when you feel the heavy boot of capitalism maybe we could just reimagine it's uh i have the heavy 0.99

00:18:30.040 boobs i have the heavy boobs of patriarchy already you already have the heavy boobs 0.89

00:18:36.980 of patriarchy I remember talking to a girlfriend of mine once and I was like you know I was so 0.99

00:18:42.820 self-conscious about them when I was younger and so I sort of would like you can't see me right now

00:18:48.300 but I'm sort of caving in my shoulders and caving in on myself and she was like patriarchy ruined 0.92

00:18:54.380 your posture and I was like fucking patriarchy I still I still like I can't I feel like I can't 0.98

00:19:03.900 walk around like this because it's like uh boobs out yes like a rabbit or something you know what 0.99

00:19:11.540 i mean like it's a bit anyway patriarchy ruined my posture that's another prescription is fucking 1.00

00:19:17.560 stand up straight fuck patriarchy don't be ashamed of your body don't let don't let other people make 0.99

00:19:24.480 you feel ashamed of your body la la la take up all your space yeah here's the last song and i've 1.00

00:19:34.440 been listening to this a lot and and you know if there's a pendulum songs of experience and songs

00:19:40.980 of innocence and man in motion is like songs of innocence then my songs of my song of experiences

00:19:46.100 that i've been listening to a lot is uh ken yates when the big one comes it's so put it under the

00:19:52.580 category of like sad man music which is a genre I enjoy for sure like I think men mourning themselves

00:20:00.420 and mourning capitalism is like a good genre for me I like to hear them talk about being sad about

00:20:07.100 how fucked up things are I don't know yeah yeah yeah sad man is like non-toxic masculinity yeah

00:20:13.700 yeah yeah sometimes they're probably toxic in their personal lives I'm sure a lot of the time 0.97

00:20:18.700 but um this ken yates song when the big one comes he just seems like he's really vulnerable

00:20:26.020 about mental health and his own and other people's that he loves and the repetition

00:20:34.300 is just i'll be holding your hand when the big one comes i'll be holding your hand when the big

00:20:39.320 one comes and listener i will be holding your hand when the big one comes we're going to be

00:20:46.040 together i also listened to this um circle of indigenous elders on a zoom link this week

00:20:56.040 talking about indigenous prophecy from all around the world about this time that we're in and it was

00:21:02.520 like uniformly joyful and optimistic it was really like i was surprised and it was deeply uplifting

00:21:10.560 and deeply beautiful but it was it was a circle of people with some really you know many thousand

00:21:17.860 years of oral tradition hundreds of thousands of years of oral tradition and and deep access

00:21:23.020 to different kinds of prophecy that we have lost access to being like it's going to be okay this 0.83

00:21:28.780 is a time when really fucking great things are coming also so i plant that seed

00:21:33.760 i believe it we do we do have a reference for this in nature of like the 0.84

00:21:41.000 the destruction of the seed um being the the point of germination right you know and the

00:21:48.620 whole thing cracks open and it all falls apart and then la la la yeah some evergreen trees are

00:21:56.940 categorized as fire resistant and some are i think the term is fire refuge like they take refuge

00:22:05.600 in the fire and there's their transformation happens because of fire they're so deeply

00:22:11.580 connected their birth patterns their life and survival patterns that they're their fire refuge

00:22:17.580 yeah that's that's the one that's the prescription

00:22:24.820 that's the prescription

00:22:26.220 by refuge

00:22:28.460 by refuge

00:22:30.000 coven we love you so much thanks for being

00:22:32.940 with us as we think through these things every

00:22:34.900 week and try to find

00:22:36.900 you know in our friendship

00:22:39.120 and in our talking out loud

00:22:40.920 to the universe about how we really feel and what we

00:22:42.940 really want our

00:22:44.800 rooted ways towards each other

00:22:47.080 and to continue

00:22:48.260 to work and resist

00:22:50.860 and re-enchant the world 1.00

00:22:52.320 And bless the fucking beast 1.00

00:23:22.320 I see it in your eyes. 1.00

00:23:25.580 Hi, sweet magical podcast listener.

00:23:29.060 It's Amy and...

00:23:30.900 Risa!

00:23:31.880 Here from the Missing Witches podcast.

00:23:34.140 We wanted to let you know that we are getting ready for our annual May fundraiser for Native Women's Shelters.

00:23:39.700 It's our third year.

00:23:41.580 It's the fourth year that we've donated our proceeds, but the third year that we're doing this fundraiser.

00:23:46.720 And it's become a community creation that we'd love to invite you to help us build this wave

00:23:53.340 Every year we donate our own proceeds for the month of May from our Patreon and missingwitches.com 0.64

00:23:58.840 And then we started to put together a raffle with prizes donated by the incredible fucking magical artists 0.91

00:24:06.380 Artisans, healers, poets, practitioners in our wide witch web and it just got bigger 0.70

00:24:11.640 So to participate in the raffle, just make a donation of $10 or more to the Native Women's Shelter of Montreal or to your own local nonprofit supporting Native women or Native people that's close to your own heart and home.

00:24:27.380 And then just send the receipt for your donation to missingwitches at gmail.com and you'll be entered in our great big prize draw.

00:24:35.280 I think we do one entry for every $10 of your donation.

00:24:38.940 So if you make a hundred dollar donation, that's 10 entries, something like that.

00:24:42.260 That's right.

00:24:43.180 Yeah.

00:24:43.660 And to learn more about this project, you can check out missingwitches.com slash reparations,

00:24:49.100 or again, email us at missingwitches at gmail.com.

00:24:52.160 And oh my gosh, and oh my goddix, and oh my all the goddesses.

00:24:56.500 If you are a listener interested in donating a prize, we are fucking thrilled to hear from 0.60

00:25:01.400 you. 0.51

00:25:01.580 so please email us same address

00:25:04.200 missingwitches at gmail.com

00:25:05.720 and we will be excited to

00:25:07.780 celebrate you and share your work

00:25:09.840 and join in this act of reparations

00:25:12.060 and community love together

00:25:13.500 thank you 0.99

00:25:15.280 bless it fucking be 0.98

Missing Witches - April 03, 2023

MW Rx. 12 - Missing Witches Prescription with Risa + Amy

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