Missing Witches - WF Debra Silverman - What Does A Good Witch Do But Dance With Everyone That She Meets？

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00:00:37.180 slash Missing Witches. You aren't being a proper woman, therefore you must be a witch. 1.00

00:00:45.080 You must be a witch. Hello, hello. There's witches everywhere. Welcome home to the Missing Witches 1.00

00:00:51.620 podcast welcome witches welcome astrologers welcome common mates welcome stars and late

00:00:59.880 nights up with your kid and heartbreaks welcome all these things that we carry with us welcome

00:01:07.160 the things that lead us with love and welcome chats with new friends and getting to learn a

00:01:14.140 whole bunch of new stuff and welcome to the brilliant and glowing you can't see her but I

00:01:19.420 can, Debra Silberman. Am I glowing? Yeah, you got a shiny glow. I spend a lot of time spearing up

00:01:29.600 at the sky looking at stars. I think that's what influences my glow. Yeah, you look sun-kissed. How

00:01:35.480 are you today, Debra? Thank you. Yes, thank you for having me. Yeah, thanks for being here. I'm

00:01:41.820 excited to have you. I was really excited. I was digging into your work. My parents are psychologists

00:01:48.020 and i i spend a lot of time talking with them about this strange intersection you know between

00:01:54.260 their research and their work and then all this reading and writing and interviewing i get to do

00:01:59.500 and you know worrying about magical thinking and and how do we kind of stay grounded and how do we

00:02:06.600 celebrate reason but also look to the stars and i i i find it so delightful and joyful that you've

00:02:13.380 dedicated your life to this intersection. Can you, can you tell us about that a little bit?

00:02:18.460 Dedicated my whole life. I spent my entire life with the desire and passion to bridge psychology

00:02:25.800 and astrology. Yeah. Not to say that's the limit to it. Cause I've also been devoted to the elements

00:02:31.840 with a equal passion, but yes, because I started off with the crazy family. It sounds like yours

00:02:37.420 wasn't crazy. Yeah, maybe not so much. They're crazy in some ways. Well, I had a really crazy

00:02:44.320 family. So because my family was so crazy, I could not figure out the logic. Well, there wasn't any.

00:02:51.080 And so I began to study astrology and it gave me great compassion for those characters. And then I

00:02:56.080 carried on with becoming a psychotherapist and looking at other people's stories and thinking

00:03:01.140 they need some insight about these characters that they ended up living in that house with.

00:03:05.520 And then as years have gone by, it's become the healing balm.

00:03:09.320 It's like, I watch people's hearts soften and I watch compassion.

00:03:12.780 And the best example was my brother took the class because I have a school.

00:03:16.980 And when my brother took the class, he found out that my father had no error in his chart.

00:03:21.220 And so for all those years where he was, he was so frustrated because he could never get

00:03:25.180 my dad to socialize or dialogue with him.

00:03:27.100 And then he studied the chart and he was like, oh my God, this is so understanding now.

00:03:31.340 I can't make him talk because his, his mode is like yours is water. He was nonverbal. He was

00:03:36.940 all about the feelings that he couldn't speak it because he was a man, but you could,

00:03:40.740 I could always feel my brother couldn't. And that changed everything immediately.

00:03:45.160 Wow. Yeah. I can imagine that. I'm, I, I'm excited. I didn't mention to the listeners

00:03:50.240 beforehand, but I was really touched that you asked for my dates and things beforehand. So

00:03:56.580 you could look at my chart before. I'm sure that gives you a little bit of insider knowledge too,

00:04:00.040 but it's also labor on your part so I really appreciate it yeah no I can't do anything that

00:04:04.760 I'm going to go deep without being able to see especially your Scorpio rising for me to be able

00:04:10.040 to understand someone and speak their language and I think the art of astrology and a really

00:04:15.800 good witch knows how to dance with the other and once you establish that you're like that situation

00:04:22.280 with my brother when he stopped pushing my dad he suddenly became a much better communicator

00:04:27.840 because there wasn't this like, so looking at a chart, I immediately know like, oh, she's double

00:04:33.020 water. So, so your level of compassion and sensitivity is such an important variable that

00:04:40.560 I can now know that we're going to go deep. And then if I, if, if the interviewer is just all

00:04:45.840 air and they just want to ask me thousands of questions, I don't challenge that. I match them.

00:04:49.680 I dance with them. How did you learn how to do that dance or can you give us advice for that

00:04:57.940 matching dance especially I don't know much but I know looking at my own chart I got I got everything

00:05:03.240 in one corner and nothing in the other corner so I know I have some some things I need to sort of

00:05:08.160 balance out what's your advice? Your chart is so versatile. Oh I'm not good at astrology Deborah I'm

00:05:16.440 going to take all your classes. Your chart actually has the indication of someone that

00:05:21.240 can multitask. Isn't that true? Yes. So you have the capacity to become many variations,

00:05:29.480 but I love the question. There's something called NLP. Have you ever heard of neurolinguistics

00:05:34.380 programming? No. It's an ancient psychological model that was brought to us in like, I want to

00:05:40.460 say the seventies, but they teach people how to pace. Like when you're having a conversation with

00:05:45.840 someone and they are slower, it is to your advantage to dance with them on their terms,

00:05:51.880 using their rhythm. If someone comes to you and they're just woohoo, like they're jumping up and

00:05:56.600 down and they're, the best thing you can do is I have this great friend who he walks in the house

00:06:00.960 and we just start jumping up and down because I know he's fire. So I would, to dance with the

00:06:06.340 other and to mean that ability to mean what you say and say what you mean by going really into

00:06:12.380 their depths and tracking where they're at and making your words meaningful. But if you're

00:06:16.960 talking to yourself, because the person sitting next to you is moving at the speed of light and

00:06:22.340 you're a turtle, or you're moving at the speed of light and they're a turtle, that will conflict

00:06:26.980 with intimacy. Yes. I've experienced that as well. Because you're so deep, you're such an emotional,

00:06:32.700 you're so service oriented and you care so much. And so if someone's going to go superficial and

00:06:38.080 not track you they're going to miss an opportunity to get to know risa but what does a good witch do

00:06:45.120 but dance with everyone that she meets i think that's my definition yes i think you dance and

00:06:51.340 then um like you say you you sometimes also uh you recognize when that's not really a dance

00:06:56.260 partner and maybe the dance then is like a bow good point can you talk more about this early

00:07:04.900 moment for you, the ways that that was healing for you? I know you say in your bio astrology was

00:07:11.620 this like huge relief. It was this understanding. You've referred to it already of understanding

00:07:15.720 your family, but can you go deeper into what that was like for you? You know, I have a lot

00:07:20.120 of fire in my chart and I, as a child collected candles and I never burnt them. I never lit the

00:07:27.900 candles in my room. I had hundreds of candles. Like I was, and I loved blueberry. I was such a

00:07:32.800 smell person, but I had all these candles, vanilla and blueberry, but I never lit them because I was

00:07:37.480 afraid of my fire. And when I got my chart and went, oh my God, that was a, you know, me being

00:07:42.940 self-conscious as a teenager and thinking, tone it down, tone it down. And then once I realized

00:07:48.140 that I was like, bring it on, bring it on. So it was the alteration for me personally

00:07:52.540 that gave me back to myself because I would have overridden in the name of the pleaser. I mean,

00:07:58.740 that thing we talked about pacing at worst you become the other person and you're a brilliant

00:08:04.120 dancer but you forget your own and that's what happened to me and so then I had to recover like

00:08:09.660 what did I leave behind what were the parts of me and honestly you know I have a lot of energy

00:08:15.160 so when I figured like duh but I had been covering it up you know we spend a lot of time in life as

00:08:21.640 a child trying to make our family happy if that's what the role was I was a pleaser

00:08:25.660 um and then when i figured it out i was like i this is ridiculous and i got myself back yeah i

00:08:31.860 i certainly relate to a lot of that as well especially the disappearing into the matching

00:08:35.560 if you're really good at matching you're really good at drawing out other people yeah you can

00:08:41.700 definitely definitely disappear because you're double water so we should just so people that 0.74

00:08:47.520 are high sensitives empaths mediums trans mediums who feel other people they leave themselves out 0.79

00:08:54.500 they are brilliant at healing and touching and caring and cuddling and cooking but they don't

00:08:59.820 leave that's that's you and then the air people who just love to talk and think and they're all

00:09:05.680 about their minds but the result of that is they can lose their own voice because they're so

00:09:10.260 scattered and they're so curious that they become like information sources but they get confused

00:09:15.400 about making decisions for example those are the air people they lose themselves the earth people

00:09:20.180 are these grounded monsters who love food and money and time and schedules, but they get so

00:09:26.180 caught in the outer world's measuring stick of success that they lose themselves because they're

00:09:32.200 compelled by that impulse to be productive workaholics. And then the fire people are the

00:09:37.800 ones that they throw their energy around and they're so loud and they're so vivacious and

00:09:42.000 they're so physical, but what happens is they become out of control. Like there's no off button.

00:09:46.360 so they're always running on full tilt until they get hit or drama you might happen to me

00:09:52.620 and they tell and you're like can't you just turn off that voltage so important to know what

00:09:59.000 you're carrying there's a low road and a high road and for me I had diminished my fire so much

00:10:06.680 and then I found it and then I had to learn how not to hurt people have not to be too excited

00:10:12.460 but still be true to myself. Yeah. What's that process like for you as someone who's really

00:10:19.620 fiery of finding fuel or coming back into my partners in Aries and we just sort of spin

00:10:26.720 around each other delightfully, you know, and now we have a three-year-old that kind of makes the

00:10:31.780 loop, I think, between us. It's such a great example because you're double water and he's fire.

00:10:36.360 um i'm sure he's triple fire i don't know his chart but i think it's all and that's what always

00:10:42.360 happens it's so classical when somebody's missing an element and this is i've written a book called

00:10:46.620 the missing element i don't know if you knew about that yeah yeah you are missing fire you

00:10:50.880 don't have fire in your chart you only have one and we call that a singleton so it's like having

00:10:55.660 none so you did attract this is so classical if i could only tell you how often this happens

00:11:00.300 so you brought a fire person into your world who one is so attractive but two can you turn that

00:11:06.000 thing off and they can't. So, so then the beauty is it's classical that the missing element shows

00:11:13.960 up in your partner at first, it's the best thing ever. And essentially it's like, wow, we don't

00:11:18.600 have the same nature at all. And this is where astrology comes in. Like don't try changing people

00:11:23.840 because that doesn't work. Yeah. And so how do you think about, you know, some classical sort

00:11:31.920 of psychology terms when you're interpreting them into astrology, or I don't know if you do an

00:11:36.680 interpretation, but for example, we've been thinking a lot about neurodiversity, neurodivergence

00:11:41.660 and, and magic. There's a lot of people in our community who had like late stage diagnoses of

00:11:48.060 ADHD or autism, especially women who are like trying to understand themselves getting this

00:11:53.800 diagnosis and being like, maybe this in part explains why I'm different, why my brain is

00:11:58.400 different. Why I feel like I can talk to trees while I've always felt like an outsider. Can you

00:12:03.860 think out loud about that for me? Yeah. Yeah. Think out loud. I love that invitation. So, so this is

00:12:09.460 the gift of astrology in spades because the client student comes to see our school. It's a six week

00:12:14.980 class. And the very first class we established the elemental. So we'd say to you, Oh, you don't

00:12:20.240 have any fire. And you would be given the homework assignment to turn up the volume, start singing

00:12:25.080 loud, stand up in the shower, like turn on the music in the car. We would give you specific

00:12:29.660 practices to get that fire channel open. Now with a diagnosis, as you described those

00:12:38.020 personalities, it's kind of obvious looking at a chart when there's conflict into someone's

00:12:43.320 mercury, for example, they've got a square to their mercury and their mental constructs

00:12:47.160 are here to do a different thing than we are. I don't know why we diagnose it with good or bad.

00:12:52.000 it's just, they are different. And that's the essence of astrology. So I was diagnosed as a

00:12:57.940 kid with a learning disability. Well, they didn't know him because I'm old. I'm like headed towards

00:13:01.640 70. You can't tell by looking. You absolutely could not. But when I was young, they had no

00:13:06.860 such term as learning disabilities. And I could not figure it out till many years till I got to

00:13:11.760 university. And I felt so self-conscious. Now, if they would have told me your Mercury's in Taurus,

00:13:17.700 So my mind, Mercury is in earth and it requires slowing down and repeating things.

00:13:25.580 Well, then I would have done so well at school, just say it six times and then I'll remember.

00:13:29.240 And then I won't, I'll be the one that never forgets it.

00:13:31.340 But if you go fast and my little Mercury, you'll tell me something's wrong with me.

00:13:37.400 Well, I can see it in the chart.

00:13:38.740 Nothing was wrong.

00:13:39.560 I just learn experientially.

00:13:41.720 I have to touch it, eat it, smell it, taste it.

00:13:44.160 And then I learn it and I never forget it.

00:13:46.460 But I had a real problem in school because while the teacher was talking, my little Gemini

00:13:51.960 raising her hand, asking, they thought I was so smart. 0.98

00:13:54.100 Then the test would come and I'd be like, uh-oh, didn't stick.

00:13:57.780 None of that stayed in my head.

00:13:59.460 I needed to repeat it.

00:14:00.620 And when I finally figured it out, school got way easier.

00:14:04.780 But it took me, hey, listen, I learned the diagnosis of my challenging brain long after 0.97

00:14:10.900 the school was, they called me, you know, they kind of, one teacher told me I was dumb. 0.97

00:14:16.460 that stayed. That's the kind of stuff that we do in a class of astrology is, oh, you mean my 0.76

00:14:22.920 Mercury's in Taurus and it wasn't dumb. It was thorough and it required deep listening and

00:14:27.420 repetition. That doesn't sound dumb. That sounds really profound. Can you give some other examples

00:14:33.100 of what Mercury in different placements might affect? So let's just do it right with what I

00:14:38.920 showed you. So if your mind is in a water sign, which by the way, you have, that means that your

00:14:45.000 thought process is emotional. Now you have a crazy memory for emotional content. Like I was wearing

00:14:52.600 a pink dress the day my brother hit me. I was standing right in the corner like, what? But if

00:14:56.840 I say to you, if I ask you a question about something that you can't remember because you

00:15:00.060 weren't emotionally vested, it would slip out like a bar of soap. Like, I don't remember a thing you

00:15:04.440 said. So your memory is based in memory of emotional content. When mercury is in water,

00:15:10.640 it's not logic it's feeling that your mind operates with that would be cancer scorpio or

00:15:16.980 pisces mercury if your mercury is in air gemini libra or aquarius your mind is so much faster

00:15:22.760 than ours and you collect so much information and you get so bored with us going so slow

00:15:28.020 that you just talk over us and you have so many more ideas that when it comes time to make a

00:15:33.500 decision you can't so you don't make this as you you're the person that says i don't know what we're

00:15:38.160 having for dinner yet. Or if I'm going to go with you, give me, wait till the end of the day. Like

00:15:41.120 what can't you decide? Nope. The water person goes, Oh, I so want to be with you. I'll make

00:15:47.000 my whole schedule around you. I've made the plans for everyone, but don't let me step on your toes.

00:15:52.640 And the Mercury and air just changes her mind and forgets that she put her phone down somewhere 0.86

00:15:58.680 and can't find it. And then Mercury and earth, as I described Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn, they want

00:16:04.140 systems. Like you make a schedule with me and don't you dare change. And if you're going to

00:16:08.620 change it, you would better let me know at least five hours before. And by the way, I don't like

00:16:12.540 when you change it. I'm going to have my little checklist. I get off on the checklist and I will

00:16:18.380 do everything on my list. And the air person's going, where did I put that list? And the water

00:16:23.480 person's going, Oh no, I have the list. I can help you. Yeah. Yeah. I made a list for me and

00:16:29.900 and yours is a poem it's so cute yes that's the poem the mercury water and mercury and fire is

00:16:38.960 these are the psychics these are the witches that just go blah like they have no filter

00:16:43.600 and their mental body comes out with one-liners and sometimes it's psychics they just know things

00:16:49.640 because it's so impulsive and their voice is louder than the rest like you there's no value

00:16:54.120 when fire mercury is um in fire is aries leo sag and they talk so loud i always know it's them

00:17:00.660 they there's like a volume knob on them but they are so much louder and so excited you're like oh

00:17:05.800 my god they can't help it and so you've been doing this practice many decades you've taught

00:17:15.460 many people you've helped many people find out this information about themselves like that must

00:17:21.800 be deeply comforting like what a gift every time is it it feels like it would be I think it's my

00:17:28.180 most like I you know it's like I feel so full because every time level one finishes and we

00:17:37.000 have hundreds of students that come there's only 10 people in a class it's an intimate class and

00:17:40.900 you study your own chart so it's not like a vague I don't like theory because my mercury is an earth

00:17:46.020 Now, you know, I want to teach people how to catch the fish, skin, the fish, identify

00:17:51.360 the fish.

00:17:51.980 I get very technical.

00:17:54.280 Yeah.

00:17:54.800 Sorry.

00:17:55.220 My partner has my three-year-old fire.

00:18:01.040 So he's loud.

00:18:01.700 It's not his fault.

00:18:02.620 He's literally tending the fire and yelling.

00:18:04.820 Don't you dare take that out?

00:18:06.500 It's gotta be in this interview.

00:18:07.880 I promise.

00:18:10.140 I promise.

00:18:11.260 I promise to leave it.

00:18:12.540 so all these personalities it's the the gift I have this life is all these personalities come

00:18:18.220 back to me after they finish level one and they say things like you changed my life I have had

00:18:23.680 husbands write me notes and say my wife is back oh she was depressed she'd lost her chi she stopped

00:18:30.480 making love to me and you gave her back her chi her fire her air her earth her water and yes it's

00:18:37.060 the most satisfying I always say this but it sounds bad but witches understand this if I die

00:18:41.780 tomorrow. Today's a good day to die is one of my mantras that most people, but you're Scorpio,

00:18:46.360 you get it. I would feel very fulfilled. I have done my job. I have watched thousands of people

00:18:52.380 come home to themselves. Yeah. What an incredible gift. And all I did, you know, and I did reset so

00:19:00.180 crazy at the sweet age of, I want to say like 20, I became a professional astrologer and all I did

00:19:08.000 was just get so passionate i'm so in love with astrology and it's never diminished so i was

00:19:14.160 going to ask you we have members of our our coven who are starting out with their business tarot

00:19:22.060 astrology um struggling and like sometimes like young queer black neurodivergent like you know 0.88

00:19:29.840 people coming from a marginalized space financial stresses who are like god i fucking want this to 0.94

00:19:35.540 work and I don't know how to make it work. Can you think a lot about that? Can you give us some 0.99

00:19:40.240 advice? Here's what I did. This is what I did. And I really appreciate that because that's a

00:19:44.580 particular category that requires extra love. Because once again, they're separated, just like

00:19:51.140 in astrology, there are certain signs that get separated. It's also true with our color of our

00:19:55.480 skin and our thought process. The simple version is my answer is give away as many free readings

00:20:00.780 as you can. Get obsessed with giving it away. There's a law in this universe. I assume everyone

00:20:06.100 knows this, but maybe they don't. If you keep giving out, there's a law. It will come back.

00:20:12.000 Now, it will feel exhausting if you overdo your own capacity, but I brought the neighbors in when

00:20:18.600 I was little into my room to do tarot readings. I brought everybody. I did every single human's

00:20:24.060 chart I could find. Now, that's my fire, so I was a little obsessed, but don't stop. You can say,

00:20:30.100 let's do a barter. Let's do a trade. You pay me whatever you feel like this is worth when we're

00:20:33.860 done. So that I don't mean free as in nothing comes back. Like I used to ask people, bring me

00:20:38.840 a gift. So there's a natural exchange. This is a law, but just keep giving out sessions. So you

00:20:46.400 refine the skill because astrology and the tarot, which is one of my deepest passions

00:20:50.520 takes years and years and years. That's really powerful advice.

00:20:55.960 really powerful. I've definitely experienced that even in the last month, just like investing in

00:21:02.260 other people's projects. And three days later, check in the mail for something unexpected,

00:21:06.520 you know, it's really true. And giving is the gift of the soul. The reason why we come to this

00:21:13.260 planet, if anyone's wondering why you're here, it's one to evolve your soul. Like you keep

00:21:19.180 incarnating again and again and again to become your authentic self. So the sooner you learn

00:21:23.720 astrology and who you are. That's the fast track. And the second is to serve. I have this friend

00:21:30.320 that has this quote he made up. You know why we live forever? Because it takes that long to say

00:21:34.880 thank you. Yeah, I feel that. He's cancer rising. And he's double water like you. He has the most

00:21:41.720 beautiful one-liners. If you can't handle what's in the here and now, don't worry. You can try again

00:21:46.580 later. Don't worry. Here's another question. And this is in part inspired by our community here

00:21:53.660 to thinking about astrology psychology mind body stuff um the impact of our stars or our psychology

00:22:03.700 our mental state and our body or our lived experience thinking about like chronic illness

00:22:09.220 people i mean i myself many people especially in this like kind of environmentally fucked world

00:22:15.620 many of us living with chronic illness is there guidance for us in in thinking a way back through

00:22:22.080 or feeling a way back into our bodies. What is yours? I had a neck injury when I was like 13.

00:22:29.280 And then I had a migraine for 10 years. I couldn't, I couldn't see clearly for 10 years. I saw

00:22:34.820 auras and was in constant pain for 10 years. And so now sometimes it comes back, um, the auras come

00:22:41.120 back or like this thing will start to come back in my back, but I don't get migraines anymore.

00:22:46.520 that's so in your chart is it yes you have Uranus it sounds so funny whenever I say it I hate saying

00:22:54.160 it because it sounds so funny never stop thinking that word is funny Uranus I don't know like a

00:23:01.500 six-year-old you have Uranus I don't know if you know this when you were born on the horizon exactly

00:23:06.920 at the moment of your birth on the eastern horizon was the planet Uranus and so the first house is

00:23:12.440 the body the the Uranus is sitting in the first house on the eastern horizon that is the body

00:23:17.860 that's the soul whatever was whatever planet if there was one sitting on the horizon at the moment

00:23:23.360 of your birth it's the signature of the chart and yours is Uranus rules the non-traditionalist who

00:23:29.240 cannot follow she cannot be part of the group and it's in Scorpio which is um it can be physical

00:23:36.240 pain. Scorpio has a huge tolerance for pain. So you came in prepared to alter, like your soul 0.75

00:23:43.420 said, I'm going to deal with physical pain as a doorway to push me into stillness. Yes, literally.

00:23:52.200 What was she thinking? So it's, it's in, and you, it opened the door for you to say, I cannot be

00:23:57.800 part of the group because I'm not going to follow that rhythm. Cause I've got to tend to my body

00:24:02.040 because I've got Uranus sitting here on my body, on the physical, on the first house side,

00:24:07.000 my body is being asked to radically depart from what everyone else does and to go into the pain

00:24:12.980 body, Scorpio, in order to find wisdom. I don't know what you were thinking when you signed up

00:24:17.420 for that. Feels right. Don't know what to tell you. There's a wonderful man out there called

00:24:24.720 Christian Sundberg, S-U-N-D-B-E-R-G. And he tells the story of what happens before we incarnate. 0.68

00:24:32.040 And before he incarnated, he also took pain on.

00:24:35.960 That was his agreement.

00:24:37.560 I mean, really, people are either on drugs or they're just taking one for the team.

00:24:41.740 I don't know.

00:24:42.520 So he and then once he moved through the pain, he became the wisdom source of why we come

00:24:48.660 into a lifetime and absorb chronic pain.

00:24:52.020 And I had a husband who died of MS, so I watched it up close and personal.

00:24:56.700 He was a saint.

00:24:57.500 A person that takes on collective pain like you have has the capacity to meditate it away, but it requires pure silence.

00:25:07.060 You need a lot of, don't bug me.

00:25:09.420 Yeah.

00:25:10.100 Right.

00:25:11.620 Yeah.

00:25:13.380 Yeah.

00:25:14.080 Yeah.

00:25:14.400 I mean, the process for me of coming out of migraine, I worked with an Alexander teacher.

00:25:20.760 so it was also just about like coming into my body like coming back gestures that were gentle

00:25:28.140 coming back into my body and now maintaining it is definitely like wall of silence spaces of silence

00:25:34.880 oh that's so beautiful i loved the imagery of the body moving slowly in a wall of silence and no it's

00:25:40.640 not for all scorpios this is specific to a planet conjunct the ascendant scorpio rising to general

00:25:46.440 terms, you could easily say they will suffer from physical symptoms in order. Listen to me,

00:25:51.820 ready? Scorpio will destroy the ego in the pursuit of its soul. It's the only sign that will kill

00:25:59.000 itself before the attacker comes to get them. Their tail will kill itself. So they have a 0.99

00:26:07.740 very high level of intensity. This is you. And that includes pain down here on earth.

00:26:13.100 and then the high road of that is to your point let me do gentle and then you master that and

00:26:22.140 then that's that's a heavy path that is scorpio rising did you not know that scorpio risings use

00:26:27.860 pain as the doorway no no i didn't know that that makes sense though and you're a soul who took on

00:26:36.080 a lot of karma because you can't with a son and that you your son is in the eighth house

00:26:40.120 you can write this down astrology students whatever house the sun is in

00:26:43.800 is the most important house in a zodiac you'll learn this in my level one class and you have

00:26:49.140 sun in the house of scorpio you probably didn't know that no so not only are you scorpio rising

00:26:54.180 but you have sun in the house of scorpio and so this now explains that this person did not do a

00:27:00.480 beige life you're like give it to me give it to me i can handle it i can handle all of it let's

00:27:06.640 see how intense you can put me into that small space, which is what migraines do and see if I

00:27:12.860 can find the door out. Yeah. It's so funny. I often have like a story about my life that people

00:27:20.340 are like, what the fuck? I happen to love them. I I'm in love with it because people one get a bad 0.99

00:27:28.700 rap, but in the system I teach, which is esoteric astrology, Scorpio is one of the very top highest

00:27:34.780 evolved signs because you come down here to eat pain. People have a misnomer. And I think witches 0.62

00:27:40.480 know this. We suffer in the soil of pain is where wisdom grows. We suffer to find wisdom. I mean,

00:27:48.020 I don't know who made it up. I don't agree with it, but it's too late now. That's how it goes

00:27:52.940 down here. So if suffering becomes the door to joy, eventually, then eat the poison and turn it

00:28:01.680 into colors that's what the peacock does the peacock eats poison off of the tree and it turns

00:28:05.780 into neon colors that's what scorpios do they eat poison and turn them into beauty

00:28:11.900 i have one more question about my own chart and then i'd love to give the folks here an

00:28:17.180 opportunity to ask you questions i can hear my kid i had another astrologer tell me once

00:28:22.500 that something about family was in a place that had to do with death so that people in my family

00:28:29.060 would have to encounter death or face death or something like this. And my, we were at the

00:28:35.520 hospital again last night. My daughter has a, has an anaphylactic allergy to bovine protein. So it's

00:28:40.540 like butter, margarine, milk, meat. So it sneaks in kind of everywhere and it crops up in things

00:28:46.740 that, yeah. Anyway. So what happens to her? She can't breathe. Yeah. She goes into anaphylactic

00:28:51.440 shock. Oh my God. She didn't last night. She didn't go into anaphylactic shock last night. 0.98

00:28:57.440 thank goodness. We're doing desensitization. So she takes a teeny, teeny bit every day and we

00:29:03.460 increase it every month. And she had her regular amount yesterday, but if her immune system is 0.98

00:29:08.300 down, I guess she was getting a cold and we didn't know her immune system is down, then 0.96

00:29:12.620 she'll react to amounts that were previously. Okay. So she just got all swollen and wheezy.

00:29:19.260 you yeah this is so you you're built for intensity and i wouldn't say death that's way too strong i

00:29:27.800 would say what i think she's talking about you know i would it's hard to point at what she's

00:29:34.400 aiming at but i can see that you have a you're a crisis management person i'd have you in crisis

00:29:39.760 anywhere you are built to come into the calm when there's stress yeah that's true yeah my we leave

00:29:47.660 these things and my husband is weeping we leave the hospital my husband's weeping and he's like

00:29:51.580 are you gonna be okay i was like i i mean yeah i don't know i'll find a time to cry about it a

00:29:57.280 week from now it'll seem unrelated exactly right good catch that is so you so funny um okay well

00:30:05.580 i'm glad you don't see like death looming in my children or something for astrology police

00:30:12.360 like there'd be a little astrology witch that would come to the person's house and say do not

00:30:16.600 say that to anyone. That is not okay. That's not true. It's true that you are fearless in the face

00:30:24.160 of deep pain, sorrow, death. You would be a doula. You'd be a great doula. My sister's a doula.

00:30:33.140 To be fair, I also took something thoughtful that she said and blew it up in my mind over time.

00:30:39.480 Yes. That's why Scorpio and negative thoughts. It's less on her and more on me, but I did want

00:30:45.540 ask about it. I have so many more questions, but I do want to give the folks who are here

00:30:49.700 an opportunity to ask because what a gift to get to have you with us. And it's so nice for our

00:30:54.960 coven to get to be here live and not just listen to recordings. So that's the real treat of being

00:31:01.160 here. So go ahead and unmute and, and say hello. Cassandra, you're good. Isn't that the name of a

00:31:11.980 witch and no one listens to cassandra well isn't that the story of too many women uh so i have a

00:31:19.200 leo sun and an aquarius moon and my oldest is a leo and my youngest is an aquarius

00:31:26.840 do you have any like hot takes on that first of all did you know you were born under a full moon

00:31:33.380 uh yes because um i go uh pardon batshit crazy on full moon well your chart whenever the sun

00:31:41.120 and moon are opposite that tells us it's a full moon because the sun that's the clue a new moon

00:31:46.800 is when there is no reflection and that sun and the moon are hanging together holding hands make

00:31:50.180 it out in the back room don't love the dark sky leave me alone but when it's a full moon it's like

00:31:54.900 so you have that very and that means that you're extremely intuitive it's no surprise you'd be

00:32:00.520 interested in understanding the magic because that's what the chart suggests when the moon is

00:32:05.320 that full and we're all outside dancing that was the perfect time for the witches to come out

00:32:11.700 And then, of course, this is a great question because it is classical, just like we found

00:32:16.100 out that Reese's husband was fired because she has no fire, no surprise.

00:32:19.700 You would have children who match your chart.

00:32:22.400 We come in pods.

00:32:24.040 And when I look at the family's charts, it's unbelievably consistent that the children's

00:32:29.020 chart and the parents chart are perfect mirrors and that they trigger each other.

00:32:33.260 So the more comfortable you are with your Leo, the more comfortable your Leo child will

00:32:37.900 be.

00:32:38.140 the more wisdom you have for your Aquarian child, the more wisdom you'll get to yourself. So there's

00:32:42.820 a echo chamber and it's like my, I have children and there, there was three of them sitting at the

00:32:48.880 table, one married into the family and they're all Gemini rising. And I was like, isn't this 0.60

00:32:53.200 funny that I'm a Gemini and there's all, so we come in clumps. And then I watched the way we

00:32:58.560 all talk so fast and everybody's moving their hands and everybody's changes topics. And we're

00:33:01.700 all laughing. We don't even know what the cryptic. And I'm like, welcome to Gemini. So in your family,

00:33:05.840 it's a little different it's the willfulness your um what the challenge for you Cassandra is with

00:33:12.640 those kids is you can't argue with a Leo or an Aquarian well you know that right right yeah

00:33:18.540 thank you you just uh so what the medicine for that is pick your fights and say okay you don't

00:33:25.920 want to take a bath tonight it's fine but tomorrow night you get no vote so you you work on where

00:33:31.180 your bump because you do not want to fight with those people they'll lose their will when we take

00:33:37.120 our children and we start to impose on a leo or an aquarium they get feisty they get by the time

00:33:42.200 they're teenagers they're like i'm out of here so the way to do that is you say to them this is a

00:33:46.520 non-negotiable and use that term very slowly and very deliberately like this moment and let them

00:33:51.940 learn that this is not you do not get a vote but this time you don't want to wear those weird

00:33:56.400 clothes mr aquarius cool you wear whatever you want i'm not going to tell you what to wear

00:34:00.160 who wants to fight with the kid about what they're going to wear nobody so you remember that your mom

00:34:06.340 trying to tell you what to do and how your will would show up and not want to listen

00:34:10.440 oh yes she told me multiple times that i should be a lawyer which i'm like oh ma'am i have anxiety

00:34:16.440 i can't do that but she had the point was that she didn't want to fight with you absolutely and so

00:34:23.880 so when we know those people are like that when you have a child like that you like is distinct

00:34:29.080 from what Risa would be like, she would be at the softest, sweetest little child who was using her

00:34:34.700 will secretly with her eyes and staring at people, but she wasn't going to argue. She was just going

00:34:40.160 to stick her feet in the ground and not move when she didn't want to. That's what Scorpio rising

00:34:44.200 does. That's not true with Aquarius Leo. They're loud and they are not going to listen to you.

00:34:49.280 And so then you have to have, this is what I call, I call it the mean mom. When my kids got to that

00:34:53.620 point where I could tell, cause I had one child who was a double Aries. And so I didn't want to 1.00

00:34:58.120 fight with a double, like it's going to burn the house down. So, but I would do it like this. As 1.00

00:35:01.540 soon as it would get to that pitch, I would say, Oh, mean mom's here. And they'd go mean mom. It

00:35:08.360 would only be rarely that I would ever do that, but they knew to be scared of me, mom. Cause when

00:35:13.380 I warned them, you do one more of that thing. And me, mom is here. And I taught them because I

00:35:18.920 learned the very neutral spot. I'm going to use my voice and you're going to hear me. And I scared

00:35:24.840 the shit out of them. And then they learned they never had to have mean mom. If they would, 0.99

00:35:28.340 when I reached that pitch, when the kid gets that willful, you get to either say I surrender

00:35:33.280 and they love when you do that, or you get to call out mean mom, but warn them, stay awake

00:35:40.640 because that's two willful kids. Thank you. You just gave me very, very many affirmations

00:35:46.920 how I've been feeling. Thank you. I appreciate you. What an interesting thing to notice over

00:35:54.160 the years that reflection between parents and kids I mean that that so speaks to what so many

00:36:00.100 of us know that our kids are there to bring out the thing that we needed challenging on but to

00:36:06.520 see it even reflected in charts is so interesting and so what happens to your point recently is a

00:36:11.840 mom like you would end up with a fire kid because she has no fire and then you're like I don't know

00:36:15.820 how to do this well that kid's gonna teach you yeah she's like Libra um and then she has like 1.00

00:36:23.120 Scorpio all throughout her chart. She's got no surprise. See my point? Yeah. Seven different 1.00

00:36:28.420 kinds of Scorpio. I was like, I'm in for this. I was looking at her chart. I go, okay. And she

00:36:34.180 does, she gets like, she's summoning her rage and good for you. So then your willingness to

00:36:42.040 be comfortable with it is you get to say, this is what I do with kids. You echo it and you go,

00:36:47.060 whoa you look angry don't don't say stop being angry to a scorpio that just makes them pissed

00:36:53.460 off or to a leo how do you get leo pissed off tell them to stop being loud tone it down no you tone 0.51

00:36:59.900 it so you just raise your voice and match the kid or if it's the scorpio kid you say i really see

00:37:04.900 your anger right now by the way you may have to go in your room because this is more than i can

00:37:09.480 handle but you don't dismiss it you don't diminish it you don't you name it i call it tagging with

00:37:14.280 kids. You tag what they're doing. You name it. Yes. And then you give them a vote. Yeah. Yeah.

00:37:21.160 We did this just the other day. Yeah. She stormed off with my, you know, kept checking back to make

00:37:26.500 sure my parents were following her, but she stormed off down the street. I'm going to the park.

00:37:31.360 Parents just don't understand. Sorry. Sorry. I don't understand. Sorry. But then like checking,

00:37:37.420 make sure someone was with her you know i came to get her and she was like kind of agreed to 0.92

00:37:44.500 leave the park got into my arms but then looked at me with like she's like do you see my face

00:37:49.540 do you see my face like what's that face she's like i'm so angry i'm like gosh you are so angry

00:37:57.480 ingo and you echoed yeah i have parents of two psychologists they don't speak astrology but

00:38:03.940 they do speak psychology, you know. You can see the magic of knowing children's charts. And I got

00:38:09.680 the privilege of working in a school, a whole school one year where every kid in the school

00:38:14.400 with the teacher, I went through their chart. I got to say to the teacher, you do not let

00:38:18.480 that little Libra girl sit next to that little Aquarius girl, because they're not going to stop 1.00

00:38:21.840 talking. And then we really learned distinctly, this kid needs you to touch them when you're

00:38:26.840 talking. This kid needs you to leave them alone when you're talking. Like there was distinctions.

00:38:31.060 And I can't think of more significant work in this lifetime than helping children understand

00:38:35.940 their chart.

00:38:36.360 And we have a specialist in our team on Instagram called Luminary Parenting, and she specifically

00:38:42.560 deals with the kids chart and the parents chart.

00:38:45.940 And she is brilliant.

00:38:47.800 Oh my God.

00:38:48.580 On my team, I have 20 astrologers that I've trained professionally and they have all different

00:38:52.540 interests, but there is one specifically working with parenting.

00:38:55.700 That's so powerful and so awesome.

00:38:57.520 Can you tell us more?

00:38:58.320 so um registration will open again in september i think for the school that's right yes september

00:39:03.760 and january the two times that's only when we have the school open there is a um immersion

00:39:09.080 coming up that's going to happen before it opens in september where i meet with everyone for 10

00:39:14.840 days and we do meditations and prayers and we do all kinds of magic but um you want to get on the

00:39:19.620 waiting list you just go to my website deb it's three words debra silverman astrology d-e-b-r-a

00:39:25.580 and um yeah the school starts twice a year and there's about 600 students that show up we can

00:39:33.720 only do that many so there's a wait list and people finish level one and they really remember

00:39:39.100 who they are and you can study your kids during the class because that I think that's the most

00:39:43.040 important thing in the whole world is think of how different I would have been if my mom would

00:39:48.400 have understood I had fire god and then the school goes on in levels and people can actually take

00:39:54.520 this training to come astrologers, right? Yeah. Level one is just a personal transformation where

00:40:00.760 you really study your own chart. Level two is the technology of how to do a reading. You actually

00:40:05.180 get the how-to and we give you a client, your first client, so you can get the ball rolling.

00:40:09.740 And level three is with me or one of my advanced astrologers. And then you do readings in front of

00:40:15.000 us and we teach you the skill. And then if you're really keen, well, you can, by the end of level

00:40:20.600 two, you can start doing readings and get paid. I mean, it's that succinct. And we have such a

00:40:25.980 good track record of people paying us back. The level one's a thousand level two is 2000. And by

00:40:31.760 the time they finish level two, all you got to do is get, you know, 10 students that you volunteers

00:40:38.040 pay you a hundred dollars and you've paid yourself back for level one. I love the fact that you've

00:40:41.680 been doing it for so long. And there's such an investment in learning yourself and understanding

00:40:46.280 yourself. And because I'm a therapist, it's not, it's not normal astrology where it's technical

00:40:51.860 and it's jargon. I can't stand that. They start talking about all this stuff and you're like,

00:40:56.020 I don't know what she just said, but if I can simplify and say, look, Uranus is sitting on,

00:41:00.220 sounds so funny on your ascendant, on your body this lifetime. So you're going to deal with

00:41:06.140 radical entrance into the pain body. And then the beauty of stillness and silence taking you

00:41:11.980 out of the pain body. Yeah. I mean, the greatest thing I learned from that experience is what it

00:41:19.060 is to know pain, right? Cause then you're just, you just know other people. You just have this,

00:41:25.220 it just opened up my highest road. I mean, Scorpio is the point of the avatar. There's

00:41:30.540 one thing that humans don't ever admit to, but look how we come into this planet. Our mom is 0.96

00:41:35.860 screaming and yelling. Yeah. Hello. Anyone that's given birth goes like, who made that up? But 1.00

00:41:40.960 that's how it goes down here. It's oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, yum. Like I tell people when people are

00:41:46.940 making love, you can't tell if it's fun or painful. Like what are those sounds? Yeah.

00:41:52.980 Yeah. That was a funny image. Gotcha. You went right from the one to the next too. I had them

00:41:59.400 blurred in my mind. I love it. So something we often ask at the end of an interview,

00:42:08.160 and I think I have you for maybe five more minutes is what is a ritual or a practice

00:42:15.260 something that's helping you right now I know you're going right now into a live meditation

00:42:20.580 you're offering so there's a lot of places that people can connect with you and your work

00:42:24.420 that are free and incredibly generous and that people can kind of follow with you and your

00:42:29.740 shiny shiny light but what's something what's something that's helping you right now in the

00:42:35.040 world? What's something that we can, we can carry from Deborah today. I do a really strong practice

00:42:42.800 with my breath and I don't do pranayama. I, I literally am on my bicycle, my witch I'm on my

00:42:49.140 broom electric bike. And every single day, wherever I am in the world, I'm on that bike. So

00:42:55.900 I think of it as my broom and I do deep breaths. I'm very deliberate about

00:43:01.700 breathing in holding it and then slowly breathing out peace or calm or love I do it every single

00:43:11.820 day I do a conscious I count them in a day how many times did I stop time

00:43:16.200 breathe in hold it and then breathe out slowly and if I I literally have learned to do this as

00:43:23.100 a practice I mean it's not woo woo and it's not like some sophisticated mantra that comes with

00:43:28.580 some culture that I don't even know. I just breathe. And it's really supported me in being

00:43:36.220 deliberate mindfulness. So that's one simple one. I have many rituals. I am a candle burning,

00:43:41.900 incense burning every single day. I get in trouble because there's little incense droppings all over.

00:43:48.100 I am a little, I call it incense poop. I am a ritualistic monster because I remember the temples

00:43:54.980 that I came from. And I didn't get this lifetime, this gift of astrology without having spent

00:43:59.500 lifetimes inside of a temple. So that has carried through with me. And that means,

00:44:04.240 you know, cleanliness. I didn't understand this till I got older earth. My was missing.

00:44:08.700 My element was earth. So I've created ritualistic, repetitive. I have my favorite smells.

00:44:14.140 I have my favorite candles. I have my favorite routes that I'm like a broken record.

00:44:19.040 everyone knows where i am because i go in circles but it's given me the gift of calm

00:44:24.900 and taking deep breaths is my very favorite one thanks for that we are definitely big fans of

00:44:33.600 the practical practical practical magic because your moon's in virgo

00:44:37.860 four planets in the 10th house of being a professional you can't stand fake

00:44:43.420 that's true except when i uh i wasn't fake but i definitely uh wrote it out in the corporate

00:44:51.640 world for quite a while yet to learn yeah oh my gosh you are just a delight to talk to thank you

00:44:58.680 so much for your time it's really such a pleasure um i sort of wish this was video recorded so

00:45:05.360 people could just see your, your beaming. So funny. I don't, I, it's just, I think I ate the

00:45:13.080 sun when I was little. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You you've got that fire thing, but not that fire

00:45:18.520 thing where it's like, Whoa, turn it down lady. I need a break. I know. You know what? You're so 0.99

00:45:24.180 sensitive and it is a problem with all my fire. I've had to learn this lifetime that not everybody

00:45:29.340 can handle my, it's the sun that I ate on their sunglasses and move a little back a little bit.

00:45:35.520 I used to take a personal and get my feelings certain. Then I realized there's some of my

00:45:38.940 friends who are fire who just think I'm cute and little. Yeah. What I also interesting gift,

00:45:46.800 just the focus on the elements. I think I knew that was there in astrology, but to have that as

00:45:52.180 just this core touchstone, these four things to look at will help me. 0.55

00:45:56.380 And that's witchcraft. The book I wrote, The Missing Element, which is subtitled Compassion for the Human Condition. You learn about the four elements right off the top. It's a very simple book. You take a test in the second chapter, and you figure out your missing element, and then you go read about it.

00:46:13.420 And it, I pretend there's, well, there's four wheels in a car, like four elements.

00:46:17.960 One of those elements goes down and you can't drive.

00:46:21.840 You want to have water, air, earth, and fire.

00:46:24.000 And that's the whole, my system that stands out the very beginning of everything I do.

00:46:29.160 It starts with the honoring of the four directions.

00:46:31.820 Yeah, us too.

00:46:33.100 Yeah.

00:46:34.320 I mean, you'd call yourself whatever you like, but you were in the pantheon of witches I

00:46:40.800 was missing, certainly.

00:46:41.880 so it's a real pleasure to meet you i'm so happy thank you so much thank you for your time i can't

00:46:48.380 wait to share this episode and share all your work with our listeners thank you again be safe

00:46:54.980 and just remember the faith that you have the sun will come up tomorrow and the moon is moving

00:47:03.920 through the sky and it's completely dependable and while this world said the elder gets scarier

00:47:09.040 and scarier you can trust that there is a design every astrologer knows that perfectly organized

00:47:15.340 by an intelligence we cannot understand and i don't think they can understand us either

00:47:19.540 i just made that up all right i'm spinning open the circle go and find deborah's meditations and

00:47:29.860 books and work find each other support each other find your missing elements if you're like me let's 0.67

00:47:36.260 go turn up some fucking music and yell real loud and find our fire again all right my loves my 1.00

00:47:42.960 friends my witches my wise ones blessed fucking me you must be a witch 1.00

00:47:52.200 here are a couple tiny quick free things that you could do right now to help the missing witches 0.97

00:48:00.360 project stay afloat and grow the old rate review and subscribe to this podcast on apple or wherever

00:48:10.180 you listen honestly truly it helps so much and even better share it with a friend share it with

00:48:18.360 someone who might love it let's weave this web together and gather all our kin thanks and bless

00:48:26.420 if I can be

Missing Witches - July 28, 2022

WF Debra Silverman - What Does A Good Witch Do But Dance With Everyone That She Meets？

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