Under the Influence (with Jo Piazza) - The Secret Life of a Real Life Mormon Trad Wife

00:00:00.000 Hello, all. Jo here, and you're listening to Under the Influence. I'm so happy you're

00:00:09.000 with me today. We're going to have some fun. Now, we've been talking a lot about trad wives

00:00:15.080 on social media and a lot about the new Secret Lives of Mormon Wives TV show. One of the

00:00:23.000 things that I can't say enough and that I do sometimes become a broken record about

00:00:28.440 is that it is very hard to hear real, raw, honest, unfiltered stories from women. 0.95

00:00:39.080 We see images of trad wives. We see images of their quote-unquote domestic bliss. 0.91

00:00:45.440 And we think it looks beautiful. And more importantly, young women looking at this

00:00:50.280 content on social media think that it looks beautiful. And I'm not being a conspiracy

00:00:54.460 theorists when I say that some of these young women who are getting a lot of their culture 0.99

00:00:59.100 from TikTok and Instagram, they are making choices based off what they see. They're making choices 0.92

00:01:05.640 based off this beautiful imagery of tradwives and domestic bliss. And the fact is, a man is never a 0.82

00:01:14.480 plan. That's why I think it's incredibly important for us to continue telling the stories of real

00:01:20.720 women who have escaped from trad wife situations, like the incredible Tia Lovings, who have

00:01:26.320 said, no, this is not what I want for myself, and this is not what I want for my children.

00:01:32.080 Today's guest DM'd me to tell me that she was a former OG trad wife.

00:01:39.120 She was just 16 when she was on her own and when she fell in with the Mormon church, and

00:01:44.920 she got married incredibly young, at 18. Her husband was so controlling, so controlling,

00:01:52.560 that he wouldn't even buy her a Kindle so she could read a book. She asked if she could go to

00:01:58.020 college, get some work experience. He didn't want her to do either of those things. He took the

00:02:05.780 church's teachings to believe that he had complete ownership over her. And when she chose to leave

00:02:13.100 him, it was hard. It was really hard. She had no money. She had no work experience. And she had to

00:02:21.980 build a completely new life for herself. Now, as many, many millions of people are watching The

00:02:29.520 Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, I want you to know that this is the actual reality.

00:02:36.480 hi i'm christianne when i was 16 my parents got a divorce we lived out here in the hill

00:02:51.000 country of texas and i went to high school with probably like 100 people in my class

00:02:56.760 and my mom and dad volatile relationship super unstable um i was fighting they ended up

00:03:05.280 separating and I went with my dad to San Antonio which is a big city outside of the hill country

00:03:11.260 um so I ended up kind of on my own at 16 my dad and mom were going through all of this turmoil

00:03:18.860 I was an only child at one point he basically said you know I'm done racing you you're kind

00:03:25.060 of on your own um I was working trying to go to school um kind of just getting into a lot of

00:03:32.780 trouble. And I mean, it's really hard to be an adult, right? When you're 16. It's hard to be an

00:03:40.180 adult when you're 44. Yeah. So I cannot imagine how hard it is to be an adult at 16. So I kind

00:03:47.560 of decided, well, I guess what's the point of school? Like I wasn't ever a really good student.

00:03:54.720 I didn't have, my parents were working both of them 40 hours a week. They worked like 45 minutes

00:04:00.440 from town. So I didn't have a lot of supervision. I had already been skipping school a lot. And at

00:04:04.780 that point, I mean, I'm probably 17 by now and I just stopped going to high school. There was like

00:04:10.580 4,000 kids in this new school. I was overwhelmed. I wasn't doing well. I didn't have any parental

00:04:15.860 audits. Nobody was telling me to go to school. So it stopped. My dad kind of was getting in

00:04:20.500 trouble, I would assume. So he went up to the school and unenrolled me. Oh, wow. Okay. So he's

00:04:26.640 just like fine it's done we're done with this for you you should probably get your gd and i was like

00:04:30.780 okay i guess so i guess let's have a waitressing um kind of waitressing overnight it was odd like

00:04:38.740 i was there's like diners out here called gyms and i would work from 6 p.m or sometimes 3 p.m

00:04:45.540 to like 6 in the morning and so there really wasn't a way for me to even go to school i was

00:04:50.220 so tired just to make money to like have gas in my car and shampoo and soap and all the things

00:04:55.300 um so i finally just he kept bugging me about the gd thing and kind of guilting me into feeling like

00:05:02.620 i was kind of worthless because i didn't have some kind of education so i went and took the test i

00:05:07.980 passed thank goodness which actually gave me some hope that i wasn't like not so hard you know right

00:05:14.940 right yeah of course yeah so then i i don't know i had always kind of befriended older people so i

00:05:23.500 friends with like our neighbor we lived in like a trailer park not a great situation either

00:05:27.500 um but she was an lbn and she was like you should go to school to be like a medical assistant or an

00:05:33.780 lbn so i looked into it um my dad wasn't nice enough to sign on a loan i went to school to be

00:05:42.060 a medical assistant and that's where i was introduced to the church i was you know getting

00:05:47.400 to the mormon church so i'm an xlds called latter-day saint um to the outside world it's

00:05:55.280 known as the mormon church but it was during that time that i was introduced to kind of a

00:05:59.680 different way of living okay yeah yeah and so how did you get involved with the mormon church like

00:06:05.180 what what was the what was the first first thing that happened to you yeah so i was in school to

00:06:10.920 be a medical assistant i was still working like two jobs i was waitressing in the evenings

00:06:15.220 was going to school but i was getting into trouble i mean like nobody was telling me it was trouble

00:06:22.860 right i didn't know right of course yeah but like something inside me was like this isn't the way to

00:06:26.480 live like drinking smoking running around with certain crowds of people things like that i mean

00:06:33.960 something in me knew like there's a better way out there right like you i could see like people

00:06:41.060 lived in nice houses and had nice cars and had nice lives we just didn't and i just i knew there

00:06:46.080 was something else out there so i'm going to school with this girl she's a teenage mom you know she

00:06:51.700 introduced me to this boy and he was mormon and i didn't even know how it came out throughout the

00:07:00.720 night but we had like a really fun time not drinking not smoking not doing anything to get

00:07:06.540 you in trouble you know um and i was intrigued i was like well he had he then he invited me to a

00:07:14.500 party at like the bishop's house his bishop's house he was telling me that he was in he was

00:07:21.340 in the military but he was home for a month on leave and kind of telling you about his church

00:07:25.900 and how it's a college ward so when you're in the lds church you kind of go to church in your area

00:07:32.900 or like with your group of your age group of people so the college ward was nearly local

00:07:37.600 university and people who were like 18 to late 20s that's where they would go to church to be

00:07:43.720 with their peers and go to church with their parents like say you're away from home or you

00:07:49.500 don't have a family or things like that right you go to church with your peers so you could

00:07:53.020 pretty much meet a me okay yeah my feeling from being in it but like that wasn't the feeling it

00:08:02.740 got right off the bat it was just like well this is really neat i can hang out with other people

00:08:06.240 my age who have fun and don't drink um so that kind of just rolled into me i was i mean i thought

00:08:13.580 it was the best things in flight spread i really did these people had so much fun they were healthy

00:08:18.920 and shiny and the bishops were nice and they were usually so that people kind of in charge who would

00:08:26.200 lead the group were older people whose kids were like our age or out of the house and it was like

00:08:31.640 having parents so it was very appealing to me i can see that i can totally see that so so what

00:08:38.620 happens next so are you mated do you find a mate yes so i was actually pretty interested it's like

00:08:47.500 really strange i was pretty interested in that boy who was in the military but like he had to go

00:08:53.620 back um so i i was just his family kind of took me in during that time like i would have family

00:09:00.800 there's a thing in the church called family home evening usually like on a monday and you spend the

00:09:05.820 evening having dinner and games and just family time reading the scriptures and praying and i was

00:09:11.720 spending that month of family home evenings with his family um he had a brother who actually ended

00:09:18.980 up baptizing me into the church that summer i was just completely smitten because the family was just

00:09:25.120 so different from what i was used to so i started going to church regularly being very involved

00:09:31.900 and that's where i met john and my husband so i was with a group of girls that i had made friends

00:09:39.320 with in the church already baptized already super into it studying my scriptures uh really just

00:09:46.080 ready to dedicate my whole life to this better way of living this cleaner way of living that's

00:09:51.160 shiny and not like where i came from so you guys get married how old were you i would be 18 all

00:09:58.140 right i'm gonna stop us now let's take a really quick break and when when we get back i want to

00:10:03.040 hear about your engagement and when you started having kids and when you realized that you were

00:10:10.600 were becoming sort of a trad wife right when you emailed me you described yourself as an og trad

00:10:15.400 wife yeah okay and we're back you are a baby your baby pants right now and you're you're 0.94

00:10:31.400 you're engaged tell me about what happens next so our vision was ridiculous like walmart ring 0.53

00:10:37.620 um but in the church it's like it's a big deal to get engaged everybody knew

00:10:45.120 every like i think it was like sunday and then by the end of church on sunday we were being called

00:10:51.020 to the bishop's office we'd probably been engaged like a couple of days he sat us down and he asked

00:10:56.660 us if we were having sex we said no he said good and basically said we don't believe in short

00:11:03.800 engagements that leads to premarital sex that's a sin you should get married as soon as possible 0.54

00:11:10.600 i'm okay great you're you're 18 i'm 18 i'm susceptible i come from a bad life and a bad

00:11:17.660 family i just became baptized and i'm thinking this is a bishop um he knows better than i do

00:11:25.880 and he knows what god wants right so um we started planning for our wedding and we were married

00:11:32.580 within probably two or three weeks after that wow okay okay yeah i mean this is the fast track

00:11:40.980 for sure and so what was married life like for you you described yourself as as we said in your

00:11:48.060 email as an og trad wife yeah and i understand every single step you've taken so far you had

00:11:55.020 no real parental figures the church felt safe as human beings we are desperate for safety and

00:12:01.200 security so i am completely completely with you i get it yeah so what happens next so

00:12:09.260 i had never met his family john was from el paso i'm from san antonio it's like eight hours apart

00:12:16.600 it's like a whole nother world texas is huge um so we go to el paso to get married we get married

00:12:23.840 by his grandpa in the backyard i meet his older sister and she hands me a little pamphlet um from

00:12:30.600 one of the prophets in the church had written and it's like a little story about john and mary and

00:12:37.660 like i read i read it and it basically kind of was like the first glimpse into what i had gotten

00:12:46.080 myself into um the little story was basically like as a woman your job is to have the home

00:12:55.540 clean take care of the children um if your husband is upset you should do everything you

00:13:01.700 can to comfort him not take it personally um turn the other cheek if something happens with

00:13:09.640 your husband it was like a setup for being dominated kind of like by a man for the rest

00:13:19.180 of your life it was kind of surreal i kind of shoved it under the rug and over the years there

00:13:24.120 was like a lot of things like that but I was so dedicated to the church because it made sense in

00:13:32.560 a way and I just it was like being freaked out over and over again that I kind of just

00:13:38.280 pushed under the rug right right and a book like that I mean so when I was researching

00:13:43.200 my my book how to be married I remember finding a book like that you know how to please your

00:13:49.160 husband how to keep a house how to greet him when he comes home and it was and it was from 1942

00:13:53.960 I think this book was probably during the 80s.

00:13:57.880 Yeah, right. And still being used today. So make no mistake, there are communities and religions out there who are still saying this is a woman's highest job and a woman's highest role, right?

00:14:15.900 Yes, it was.

00:14:16.720 Yes.

00:14:16.960 And that was something that was repeated often in the church, that you were called by God

00:14:24.580 to be a mother, to be a wife, to take care of your home, to take care of your household, 0.99

00:14:28.840 because they held what was called the priesthood, which was something that a woman could not 0.98

00:14:36.500 hold.

00:14:37.920 And so they were almost revered.

00:14:41.100 Your husband held the priesthood.

00:14:42.640 He was in charge of your family.

00:14:43.980 He was in charge of you.

00:14:44.960 the decision making the purse strings all the things and he was the one that could bless your

00:14:50.380 family could bless your children when they're sick could go and bless other people could hold

00:14:55.620 positions of power in the church like a bishop and a deacon and women were just the spouse

00:15:01.920 he definitely subscribed to that he wanted to be in charge I had to have dinner ready every evening

00:15:14.380 we started having children i mean right away we were married in october and i was pregnant

00:15:18.900 by december with our first child and i delivered like two months before i turned 19

00:15:25.900 wow wow yeah so it was very shortly after that i was pregnant again with our second son

00:15:36.120 okay okay and so yeah this is the very definition of a trad wife and this is the reality uh

00:15:44.380 You know, on Instagram, there are a lot of accounts that make this look beautiful and idyllic and easy.

00:15:50.840 What was the reality for you?

00:15:54.620 So in a way, the church makes it seem like you're doing God's work.

00:16:02.220 Like you are doing what is right so that you can have this eternal family.

00:16:07.300 That is like a big selling point in the church.

00:16:09.500 Like you're going to be a forever family.

00:16:11.380 You're going to be in the highest level of heaven.

00:16:13.160 you know you do everything that's right and there i mean there are sayings about this all

00:16:20.360 the time choose the right choose the still small voice um doing the right thing you know if you're

00:16:26.280 thinking something negative it's probably your fault so you need to change your point of view

00:16:31.280 um when it came to like john and what he expected it was all those same things like dinner needs to

00:16:39.280 be ready i worked all day so i shouldn't have to do anything my clothes need to be clean at one

00:16:45.020 point i wanted to go back to college because i i just had dreams of doing more and like being able

00:16:52.520 to contribute and he was like no no wife of mine is ever going to be working this is your job

00:16:58.300 at home one time when i was pregnant with our i knew that it was i knew that things were

00:17:07.080 great and i knew that eventually i'd have to get away from him i was pregnant with our second son

00:17:14.420 and i didn't have dinner ready when he got home one night because i was so sick i had horrible

00:17:19.320 morning sickness all day sick hiss you know how that goes oh yeah and he came home when he was

00:17:25.240 furious furious like throwing things around yelling screaming at me because i didn't do my

00:17:30.920 duty while he was at work and he was so angry and i was like there's leftovers and he was

00:17:36.100 there was no excuse to him. He's like, you could have at least heated up the leftovers

00:17:41.280 because that's your job. And I don't think it was independent to him. I mean, we had meetings where

00:17:48.020 we, you know, swapped recipes, talked about how to be a good wife and be a good mother. And this

00:17:52.860 was all like part of it. We were there to serve. It really felt like that. And

00:17:58.260 yeah, it was just a difficult, it was a difficult time. I mean, at one point,

00:18:05.240 I mean, he didn't, he controlled the money, too, to, like, how much you spent, how much you spent on groceries, what you spent it on.

00:18:13.940 I remember once I wanted a Kindle because I really enjoyed reading, and he would say things like, you don't need something like that.

00:18:22.300 Reading takes you away.

00:18:23.340 When you're reading things like that, it takes you away from me and the family, and your attention's not on us, and that's not right.

00:18:29.220 And, I mean, it was just insane like that.

00:18:32.540 And that's real control, okay?

00:18:34.400 and i love hearing these details my heart breaks hearing these details but you know again when we

00:18:41.220 see the trad wife fantasy what we're not seeing is the level of control that goes down to i don't

00:18:50.420 want you to read yeah um and then goes goes even further to i don't want you to go back to school

00:18:57.080 to do something that you think will better yourself make you feel good about yourself

00:19:02.920 and that is a level of submission that no one should go through not not men not women not

00:19:10.340 children um it is a complete stripping of agency yeah definitely and you know

00:19:16.240 on some level when you're for me being in a church I felt like I was doing the right thing

00:19:23.660 though I was being a mother with being a homemaker that was like revered in the church

00:19:29.240 like you're a good homemaker there was almost like a competition among women of like how good

00:19:33.860 of a homemaker could you be how clean can you get your health let's swap recipes let's swap 0.99

00:19:38.160 baking recipes and how well am i raising my children on organic food that i've cooked myself

00:19:45.940 i can see where the trad wife on instagram can look beautiful because it did look beautiful

00:19:55.320 from the outside. Of course it does. Of course it does. And because it strips the labor and you

00:20:02.500 don't see this submission. And that's what I think we have to be talking about because it is

00:20:09.260 essentially cosplaying these beautiful lives. Let's take one more quick break here. When we

00:20:14.080 get back, I want to talk about the end of this marriage and what life was it like for you when

00:20:19.720 you came out of it with no work experience and no money yeah we are back so christine

00:20:33.820 talk to me about how your marriage your first marriage ended so

00:20:38.660 john so we're along the way after we had our second son he started to fall away from the church

00:20:49.500 He didn't want to go with me anymore. He didn't want to participate. He didn't want to go to the priesthood meetings. He wanted to start drinking and, like, have more fun. I don't know what it was that he was exactly getting lost from the faith, but I was so deep in the faith that I was deeply upset by this.

00:21:15.440 i gave him a hard time about it and he didn't like that so he started buying me books um

00:21:23.320 about how the mormon faith was a lie oh okay so he he was very manipulative and like always wanting

00:21:31.680 to get his way you know if it was the church that was helping him to keep me under his thumb he was

00:21:37.140 using that and now it you know he didn't want to be a part of that anymore he didn't believe in it

00:21:41.960 So now he wanted me to not believe it.

00:21:44.240 So he bought me a bunch of books.

00:21:45.540 One of them was called Leaving the Saint.

00:21:47.520 I would highly recommend that to anyone who is questioning their faith.

00:21:51.520 It really did help me see that it was a cult and it was keeping me down.

00:21:59.200 And that revelation made me realize that I didn't need to be married to him anymore.

00:22:06.400 I didn't need to worry about being divorced, worry that I was going to be punished by God,

00:22:11.640 worried that i wasn't going to have this eternal family because i was married to an abusive man

00:22:16.420 right so in pulling me away from the church it ended up freeing me from him great i love that i

00:22:26.400 love that i love that side effect really admit that his biggest mistake in our marriage was

00:22:33.380 getting me to lose faith in the church because it made me realize i don't need to be married

00:22:39.360 to an abuser. No, no. And you said in your email to me that you guys also grappled with his porn

00:22:46.360 addiction, which, as I'm learning, does become a big issue with men in conservative communities.

00:22:56.020 We're seeing it on the reality show The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives right now. Talk to me a

00:23:01.360 little bit about that. You know, I actually was very hesitant to watch that show. There's a lot

00:23:06.140 of things about the lds church that i still kind of subscribe to um no r-rated movies no movies

00:23:13.180 that are overtly sexual just things like that kind of stuck with me and i still feel a bit of

00:23:18.040 shame and sin when it comes to them so i was struggling with even watching that show but

00:23:22.300 my uh curiosity got the best of me coming from that faith and i actually felt very deeply for

00:23:28.860 whitney um everything that she was going through with her husband was exactly what i went through

00:23:34.920 with John and just like this porn addiction and making you feel like it's like your fault keeping

00:23:40.360 it quiet being very ashamed about it and then having to like because of the church accept this

00:23:47.820 person like I have to forgive and accept this man and even the bishops are telling you at that point

00:23:55.040 when you're struggling with your marriage that like you have to forgive you have to help him

00:24:01.540 like it's almost like the blame comes on to you in a way like you have to help him you have to

00:24:08.440 fix you have to fix this yeah yeah definitely it's definitely very common i think because when 0.97

00:24:15.180 you have a religion that has no and very limited sensual education masturbation is completely

00:24:22.780 like discouraged i mean you the young men from what i know go in to speak with the bishop when 0.99

00:24:29.460 their in their early teens and they explicitly ask them have you masturbated and they will tell

00:24:38.140 them you should not think about this you should not do this this is a sin you will not get your

00:24:42.260 temple recommend um it's i i think that things like that can really lead to problems like board

00:24:49.780 addiction and cheating and things like that that happen a lot in the church and nobody wants to

00:24:54.360 talk about it absolutely absolutely so you decide to leave did he make it hard for you oh girl so

00:25:02.040 he we sold our house and made a little bit of money and moved back to his hometown of el paso

00:25:09.960 we had been living like in colorado he worked in the oil field and i took some of that money

00:25:15.200 um because i was on the account and i bought a car um that angered him horribly because he knew

00:25:21.640 that I was trying to kind of get away from him and get divorced. I had brought up divorce many

00:25:25.920 times. He took the car and gave it away to someone that was working for him and told me that women 1.00

00:25:33.080 who are married do not, like should not, do not have property. That their husband has the property 0.91

00:25:41.060 in his name, not the wife. So then I'm left without a car again. Luckily, my parents had helped me

00:25:47.000 um buy a car i mean can you imagine like took my car i don't have a bank account he controls my

00:25:53.020 money how am i gonna get away um my dad helped quite a bit helped me get a car gave me some

00:25:59.680 money um i rented like a really terrible apartment i got a job at a call center just anything i could

00:26:06.460 do to make money and take care of the kids and keep them in daycare but i went back to him i'm

00:26:13.940 not even kidding, probably four or five times because he just continued to not sign divorce

00:26:19.580 papers, to harass me, to show up at my door, to threaten me. And sometimes it was just easier to

00:26:24.720 go back. Of course it was. Of course it was. I mean, leaving is hard. Leaving is hard. And you

00:26:30.000 had no resources and no money and two children. Yes. And they were very young. I tried to leave

00:26:38.140 him when our youngest was probably under one years old was the first time it took about five tries

00:26:44.820 and then um in those five tries there's probably a period of two years and he kept making what he

00:26:52.500 thought were like i don't even know the word for it's not coming off the top of my head but he

00:26:57.400 would let me do things so like he let me go to college for a while which really helped me get

00:27:04.780 away because I was able to get grants and student loans that put some money in my pocket that helped

00:27:10.560 me actually get away from him in the end but he would like let me do these little things trying

00:27:15.900 to entice me to like stay with him like oh look I am more I'm gonna give you more and be a better

00:27:21.160 husband like you can go to college and then when it would get annoying to him he would like

00:27:25.580 take off with the car because at this point we still only had one car take off with the car and

00:27:30.600 I wouldn't be able to go to class and then he would come home and yell at me that it's my fault

00:27:33.620 because his work comes before me going to school kind of thing there's still a lot of control

00:27:38.700 still a lot of control but you left you made it out i did i did i was here of college and i got

00:27:45.840 a student loan and i moved um about 45 minutes away to a neighboring city in a neighboring state

00:27:55.180 so that i was still kind of close to him so he could see the kids and couldn't put that resentment

00:28:00.300 in them because i knew that's kind of the way he would be like oh your mom took you so i moved to

00:28:06.680 new mexico which was like 45 minutes from el paso and um i had this big student mode in my pocket

00:28:12.820 and i made it work and i graduated college with two little dudes on my hip and i made it out yeah

00:28:20.060 i did thank you and you made it out you made it out but and you did it yourself like you were the

00:28:26.640 hero of your own story yeah yeah i would our culture sets men up to be the heroes and that is

00:28:33.080 almost never the case true okay yeah almost never the case and so wow like just you deserve a big

00:28:40.820 big round of applause you did it what advice or warnings do you have for other young women

00:28:47.680 who think that this life looks beautiful and idyllic as opposed to a life of working to

00:28:54.320 support yourself i think that that's like a double-edged sword almost to say because 1.00

00:29:01.520 the women like you've mentioned many times that are on tiktok and on instagram they have an income

00:29:08.880 yes when you look at the secret lives of mormon wives or whatever that show is called 0.89

00:29:14.740 they have an income this is not the same thing like they are making being a trad wife look so

00:29:21.300 great and if a young woman subscribes to that you better have a backup you better have a savings 0.94

00:29:26.300 account that your mom that's in your mom's name that she's going to sign over to you and you

00:29:29.860 better be sure that your parents support you leaving that person if it gets bad because

00:29:35.740 if something goes wrong and you have no money how are you going to get away i at least had

00:29:41.560 a parent who was willing to send me money when i needed it and help me out because if i didn't

00:29:47.460 have that I don't know if I would have gone away I don't know if you would have either that's true

00:29:51.800 have an income there was no income there was no social media there was no making money on the

00:29:57.360 internet there was none of that I mean there were times when I felt like I had no choices

00:30:01.780 what am I going to do how am I going to make money how am I going to feed these kids how am I

00:30:05.320 going to get away from this person so they can make it look as beautiful as they want but they 1.00

00:30:12.060 have an income right exactly exactly it's true and the women on the show the secret lives of 0.60

00:30:19.900 mormon wives look i got a lot of feelings i got a lot of feelings but they do not mince words when

00:30:25.180 they say we are the breadwinners we are making money here and so but what gets me on these social

00:30:32.200 media accounts and i say this all the time i'm a broken record when women claim i'm submitting to 0.90

00:30:39.800 my husband I have I let him control all the finances and they're making money off of that 0.84

00:30:44.700 I don't think that that's what's happening with the women on the show I think they're very up 1.00

00:30:48.460 front about making money but there are a lot of trad wives who say no we just you know I am just

00:30:53.500 you know responding to my highest calling as a wife and mother like I don't do anything outside

00:30:57.980 home and that's a lie it's just a lie they're making money and good for them I want all the 1.00

00:31:01.740 minute I want all the women to make all the money yeah I mean there is a chance that if they truly 1.00

00:31:07.040 are in a faith like this that they are their highest calling and the man is controlling the 0.79

00:31:14.920 money that they bring in which in itself is that's also a dangerous situation because what if

00:31:19.780 something goes wrong something can always you i mean you should i hate to say that i hate to be

00:31:26.020 a downer on marriage because i am remarried and i have a great husband but i mean you have to have

00:31:31.360 a backup plan just in case because you never know you should always have a backup plan okay like i

00:31:38.140 love my husband i am married to a good plan i'm married to a good man i'm like i'm married to a

00:31:42.520 good plan i'm also married to a good plan to be honest um but uh he could die tomorrow yeah

00:31:48.880 i would say that yeah i don't i don't mean to be negative but i don't want to be negative but like

00:31:54.860 he could die he could he could have a nervous breakdown uh he i'm gonna i'm knocking on all

00:32:00.900 of the wood right now like you could lose you know lose his mind get dementia like there's a 0.54

00:32:04.400 he's walking into the room right now i mean i'm about to go to the gym there's a thousand things

00:32:09.080 that can happen to a man so you need a plan definitely at least yeah yeah i definitely

00:32:14.940 agree at 18 getting married having zero education zero skills that transfer into making money

00:32:22.220 that just gets bigger and bigger and bigger as you get older i mean what are you going to put

00:32:27.700 on a job application at 20 sadly we live in a country where you can't put mom on a job application

00:32:33.180 but um that's also i mean because it is it is a job of course it's job you do all the things you're

00:32:37.960 a ceo you're a project manager you're so many many things um that said we don't live in that

00:32:42.300 country so true um there is that christine i loved hearing your story so much thank you so much for

00:32:49.500 sharing it with me have a wonderful wonderful weekend i'm just i'm inspired by you thank you

00:32:53.860 I'm inspired. I loved your book. It was so good. Couldn't put it down.

00:32:58.220 Christine is so brave. So brave. That's all we have for today. I loved being here with you.

00:33:05.660 If you enjoyed this show, please leave us a review. Share it with your friends. Go buy 19

00:33:10.580 copies of The Sicilian Inheritance. It's nearly the holidays, people. You need to be gift shopping

00:33:16.160 already. You need to be gift shopping already, right? And if you buy a new copy and you DM me,

00:33:22.680 I will send personalized nameplates for anyone on your gift list.

00:33:27.620 Now go have a great day and do something nice for yourself. You deserve it.

00:33:52.680 Transcription by CastingWords

Under the Influence (with Jo Piazza) - September 21, 2024

The Secret Life of a Real Life Mormon Trad Wife

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