Vulgar History - Movie Discussion： A Knight's Tale (2001)

00:00:00.000 hello and welcome to vulgar history the feminist women's history comedy podcast my name is ann

00:00:15.820 foster and this is a little holiday gift for all of you uh so for the last few years i've been

00:00:22.220 having this podcast spin-off series that's available to people on my patreon that is called

00:00:28.800 Vulgar Peace Theater, where myself and people who you know from this podcast, Alison Epstein and

00:00:34.100 Lana Wood Johnson, and we talk about costume dramas from, well, I don't know, just costume

00:00:39.820 dramas taking place in all different time periods, but movies, basically, sometimes TV shows. And the

00:00:45.900 three of us each take a turn picking the film. And it's often, it's usually something that one

00:00:50.040 of us has seen and the other two have not. And in this instance, this was a pick by Alison Epstein,

00:00:55.380 and it's the movie A Knight's Tale.

00:00:57.480 And the reason that I'm choosing this one

00:00:59.700 to just have everybody listen to is,

00:01:01.440 first of all, it's just a joyous episode.

00:01:03.240 We all love this movie.

00:01:05.700 And I had asked on the Patreon to people,

00:01:09.240 like, what do you think is a good episode

00:01:10.880 of Volga Peace Theater that would just kind of

00:01:13.480 cheer people up and be a delightful treat?

00:01:15.540 And this was by far the one that most people voted for.

00:01:17.760 So I'm really excited for you all to hear this.

00:01:20.360 It's my gift to all of you.

00:01:21.940 Thank you, Tits Out Brigade, for supporting me

00:01:24.600 and the podcast and my book. This whole year, this whole fucked up weird year. And there's lots 0.98

00:01:31.660 more vulgar history coming in 2020. What is God knows 2025 next year. And I'm happy to have you

00:01:40.180 all here with me and enjoy, enjoy this little delightful episode of Vulgar Peace Theater.

00:01:46.180 my gift to you. Hi, welcome to Vulgar Peace Theater. I'm Anne Foster. I'm joined here with

00:01:56.640 Alison Epstein, Lana Wood Johnson. I do want to say before we get into the episode,

00:02:01.060 just because I have just recently wrapped up the international season. So I asked on Instagram,

00:02:06.780 what were your favorite episodes? And everybody's like, Cece, Catalina, Lola, and also Sushi. And

00:02:14.280 And so, like, Lana was not on the Sushi episode, but you, like, inspired it.

00:02:18.360 So I just wanted to say to both of you, your vibes are strong.

00:02:21.960 I do want to say that I love every time I come on the main pod,

00:02:26.280 the person I'm talking about gets a 27.

00:02:29.060 And it's in the same way every single time. 1.00

00:02:31.640 Because it's just like, you're a scandalous, horrible, dumbass. 1.00

00:02:35.460 27 points. 1.00

00:02:36.720 And I love that.

00:02:38.100 Yeah, I love that.

00:02:39.860 That sort of grotto.

00:02:42.140 Just that the area.

00:02:44.280 dirtbag yeah dirtbag island is where you stay we have a flag and everything and a couple people 0.65

00:02:51.000 and i have been messaging me like did you know this movie's coming out it's about cc it's called

00:02:54.320 corsage i'm like i'm aware so so very aware coming to select theaters december 23rd i know um and

00:03:05.100 coming to this podcast sometime when it's as soon as it's on streaming we will be discussing it um

00:03:12.600 So today we're talking about A Knight's Tale.

00:03:14.880 This is Alison's pick.

00:03:16.040 I just wanted to quickly say,

00:03:18.240 so it was written and directed by Brian Helgland,

00:03:21.460 a person who's done Helgland, Brian Helgland.

00:03:28.160 He's done some other stuff, but nothing like this.

00:03:31.320 And the costumer is someone who, so Caroline Harris,

00:03:35.180 and she's worked with him on several other films,

00:03:37.920 none of them like this.

00:03:39.980 And when I say like this,

00:03:40.820 it's because this movie is really singular she's really done mostly contemporary costuming since

00:03:48.000 this the costumer which i think is a shame i think that should be out there doing every costume drama

00:03:53.260 because the choices she makes are exquisite anyway i just wanted to say who these people are so brian

00:04:01.340 helgeland what did he do also is he like he wrote and drafted like this was his thing he did that

00:04:09.100 one where tom hardy plays twins twin gangsters i didn't see he did 42 starring chadwick boseman

00:04:14.880 about jackie robinson he's got a real eclectic career which is it's i don't know it's there's

00:04:20.500 so much to talk about this movie it's so specifically itself all i'm gonna say because

00:04:25.420 we i just want to start with like sort of where we were coming into this film and so i remember i

00:04:29.600 saw it not in theaters but like around ish the time it came out and all i remember was shannon

00:04:35.840 Sossaman had interesting outfits and her hair was spiky and there was um one or two red-haired

00:04:41.440 characters so coming into this that was all that was all I remembered and both of those things were

00:04:46.880 true that is correct yeah um Lana what is your experience with this movie I saw it when it came

00:04:53.780 out and I enjoyed it enough and I don't think I've watched it since it is not my time for my

00:05:02.240 my best friend is in sca and she refuses to watch this movie because of reasons but she she and i

00:05:09.680 have an agreement where she doesn't go after 1600 and i don't go before 1600 and then we don't get

00:05:16.680 in fights about history so it's good she's not here to be fair there is almost no history in

00:05:22.480 this movie so correct correct i will say that there's some implications of history yes there

00:05:29.940 are people in this movie that would hint at a year but the movie itself never gives a year that

00:05:35.640 it's in so which is good because it's like smack dab in the middle of the black plague so but you

00:05:43.180 know who's unaffected by that is that sorry i'm going to talk about them later but my favorite

00:05:46.640 character in this movie was maybe the extras who are just all so happy to be there in every

00:05:51.060 sorry allison you you chose this film what is your history with this film i did i chose this film

00:05:58.120 because it is my number one favorite film of all time and this is the stake i put in the ground

00:06:03.720 that a knight's tale is a perfectly constructed film i have no notes i saw it when i was i think

00:06:09.080 in middle school because my mom saw it in theaters and she was like you're gonna love this and so she

00:06:13.120 got it like the blockbuster in like 2005 and i was like ah yes my entire personality for the rest of

00:06:20.140 my life it is this film i will point out as we go along in this podcast all of the extremely

00:06:27.320 formative moments of this film that made it into my novel because like who the direct influences

00:06:33.580 are direct and influential but I must have seen this movie a dozen times between middle school

00:06:39.720 and high school and then I haven't seen it since so this was a delightful revisiting I had a whole

00:06:45.620 journey Atlanta's face is judging me so hard listeners you can't even you can't even begin

00:06:49.740 to understand how hard I am judged no no it's not judgment it's I saw this movie with my husband on

00:06:56.040 a date oh okay okay because i am a literal child i see you're making me feel old but it also

00:07:05.400 explains why we have very different reactions because i have very formative middle school

00:07:09.820 movies that are are not good this is actually a good movie it's just thank you and it came at an

00:07:19.160 important time to me can i just ask for all of us like both when we first saw it and where we are

00:07:24.760 now and our experience of heath ledger as a performer because when i first saw it like around

00:07:30.760 when it came out it was when he thought it was just coming on the scene and it was like look at

00:07:34.540 this handsome guy and i understand now that he was like please don't market me like that i'm an

00:07:39.840 interesting actor but this is very much just like he's ledger here's the new hunk he's on teen beat

00:07:45.580 magazine so i was just like oh this guy he's so overrated so when i first thought i was just like

00:07:49.120 this guy but now looking back on it also how young he was in it he's like 20 years old when

00:07:54.840 he did this movie i really appreciate his performance and in a way that i i know that

00:07:59.640 i didn't at the time because i just thought he was this kind of like overrated heartthrob

00:08:04.060 of a person i thought he was very nice to look at the first time i watched this movie and i still

00:08:09.300 think that i still think that although i think he's an incredible actor and i will watch him

00:08:15.620 anything feel very cheated out of the decades of Heath Ledger films like that I've had yeah

00:08:20.400 I I liked him in um The Patriot I liked him in this I loved him in 10 Things I Hate About You

00:08:27.740 and then it's like and then he was just Heath Ledger he was just an actor that was just very

00:08:33.080 solid in the movies he made oh he was in The Brothers Grimm I do love that one especially

00:08:38.220 oh we should do that that's what that's right for sure that is not historical anything that

00:08:45.260 no that is not history that's lana rant stuff you know half of this is for our own individual

00:08:53.820 rants why do you think we watch anastasia the animated musical i will be uncontrollable because

00:08:59.780 the grims are one of my things i mean we can put that on there but that can be like you choose that

00:09:05.360 when you feel like you're in a place where you're ready to to dive into that emotion when we pick 0.90

00:09:10.940 when we pick our anger thing he was the he was by far the most amazing joker of all time and i hate 0.89

00:09:16.560 that it hurt him yeah yeah yeah he was so good in brokeback mountain like around then it was when i

00:09:22.680 was like oh he's ledger he's not just a pin-up like he's actually colin farrell i think had a

00:09:27.280 similar trajectory other than he did not tragically die very young where it was just like look at this

00:09:33.260 hunk and he's like please let me do interesting movies and he's aged to a place colin farrell

00:09:36.940 where he can do the weird stuff he always wanted to do and i i also kind of think sometimes what

00:09:41.840 what would he fledger have done if he was still around now i think he would be in some sort of

00:09:45.620 like tv series i think he would have done 14 different uh a24 films and also the knives

00:09:52.440 that's what i think he was on a tv show called roar in like the late 90s that was it was so

00:10:02.500 poorly produced but he was like the best part of it and at what like the entire time everybody's

00:10:08.980 torques were worn askew and i was hanging out with my geek nerd friends and of course one of

00:10:15.140 them would wear a torque and it would go askew and every time it went askew everybody'd yell

00:10:18.700 wrong for the me among the listeners what is the torque the um it's the celtic uh necklace that

00:10:30.000 men wear that's like it's it's got it's like a um braided wire and it has little two little um

00:10:36.920 balls at the end yeah open in the front and it like if it's straight on the two balls are like

00:10:43.100 right around your adam's apple and when they're askew it just looks it looks wrong and it was

00:10:48.500 always wrong on him in that show and that is that is a formative experience for me

00:10:55.520 i was impressed when i said we are gonna like listeners this is gonna be a long discussion

00:10:59.900 but you know you know you signed up for somebody actually sent me a message saying like these are

00:11:04.480 her favorite things and she wishes there was more of them the vulgar piece theater discussions which

00:11:08.740 is like i think we do exactly as many as we're like fundamentally capable of doing but like thank

00:11:14.300 you for that um we also love them we do it's my favorite part of the month it's such a treat i'm

00:11:21.160 so happy to talk about this movie that we're all good after like you've had a month to decompress

00:11:25.380 and from the trauma that I caused you last time

00:11:27.860 with Queen Margot.

00:11:29.180 Also, I really, really had to redeem myself

00:11:31.080 after my last pick

00:11:32.140 because like I changed my country

00:11:34.540 when I made you all watch.

00:11:36.120 Les Mis was my last pick.

00:11:37.860 But that's brought so many TikToks.

00:11:41.820 I have ruined Lana's For You page ever since.

00:11:45.340 Yeah, Lana keeps supporting us like your TikToks.

00:11:47.580 They're all funny.

00:11:48.880 They're all Les Mis parody TikToks

00:11:51.340 and they're all great.

00:11:52.900 Every once in a while, my For You page

00:11:54.720 will throw up the most amazing vulgar history tie-in and half of them are Les Mis, but I

00:12:01.480 I sent one last night that was spot Conlin appreciation fan posts. And I'm like, yes,

00:12:07.040 now my for you page knows me. We're fixing the algorithm.

00:12:11.220 Oh, and also what you've taught me is the most recent episode of vulgar history that

00:12:17.720 just came out. And we're talking about Zhang Yisao, the Chinese lady pirate. There was a part where

00:12:22.340 she puts together the confederation of all the pirates and i and i was like in the podcast i'm

00:12:27.380 just like it's like in newsies how all the burros come together and one of them has a slingshot and 0.83

00:12:32.340 one of them has top hats but they all come to work together so like i wouldn't never have made 0.94

00:12:36.860 a comparison if you hadn't made me watch newsies so thank you and and she she which is even better

00:12:43.940 he all right so i was looking at just like various trivia points about this movie and

00:12:49.820 so he was cast in this i think he had done 10 things i hate about you which is where why he

00:12:54.020 became this like teen hearthrob like obviously to me at the time i was martin joseph gordon levitt

00:12:58.860 in that film when i was a teenager but now i can appreciate he's anyway but he was cast in this

00:13:04.480 movie because someone had saw the footage of him being in the patriot and thought he was so good

00:13:08.520 they're like this like 20 year old australian guy can lead a movie and they were not wrong

00:13:12.900 like he has a star quality and a charisma that it's like still sort of like emerging in this film

00:13:18.000 but like he carries a film on his shoulders and this movie could have not worked but he's

00:13:24.680 he makes it go down so easy it all like he holds it together and i think for someone so young like

00:13:32.100 whatever when he's like 20 years old or something it's just like very impressive of him i have to

00:13:37.360 say i'm i'm sorry you can't you can't say that and not include mark addy because that man held

00:13:44.260 this film together i would say shannon saucerman's wigs hold the food together but we will get to

00:13:51.720 that mark addy was a revelation in this film the cat it was you know what across the board it was

00:14:00.780 the casting was perfection it really was but it's not a weak link in this movie i love everything

00:14:05.880 right but like if they'd put like matt damon in the lead it wouldn't have been as good

00:14:09.540 you know i'm just like i want the alternate universe where that movie exists and i can watch

00:14:15.120 it i'm just like yeah the ben affleck shakespeare in love version of this movie yeah like where's

00:14:23.520 that yeah so okay so he's a great choice for the lead character um i have my notes they are i'm

00:14:29.820 gonna say shorter than sometimes i think and that's because so i watched this movie twice

00:14:33.960 because i had time to do that so once just for enjoyment and once to take notes and when i was

00:14:38.640 taking notes i'm just like oh this is like when we did musicals and there's but instead of long

00:14:42.780 songs where i get to not take notes because they're singing it's just long jousting sequences

00:14:47.000 where i was like oh this is actually great i can just type joust scroll on instagram are they still

00:14:52.180 jousting okay and then i can come back and that's because what we're watching is a sports movie

00:14:56.920 not a historical drama so you can skip through all the games you're like ah sport happened and

00:15:03.140 that is what my notes say frequently and that said she did have seven pages of notes when she

00:15:09.700 says they're shorter than usual it's because they're usually nine pages i think i've gotten

00:15:14.060 as high as 12 but um i was just like wow the movie's almost over and i have so few notes

00:15:18.840 it starts off like when i started watching i was just like oh good it starts off with text

00:15:24.060 like every movie we've done has started off with text except for amadeus a movie that started off

00:15:29.880 where i was just like what city are we in what year are we in and i was so unmoored where is my

00:15:34.300 label vienna 1740 whatever tell me a year and date this one doesn't say year and date but it

00:15:39.680 does explain so in medieval times a sport arose embraced by noble and peasant fans alike though

00:15:46.500 only noble knights could compete the sport was jousting for one of these knights and over the

00:15:52.020 hill former champion it was the end but for his peasant squire william it was merely the beginning

00:15:57.640 and then we see footage of a knight in a joust falling off of a horse which i later read was

00:16:03.120 actually footage of like a stunt gone wrong and they were like oh we can put that in the movie

00:16:06.440 let's just use that so no horses were harmed in the making of this film but they do fall down

00:16:12.360 sometimes i want to point out for anyone who's like me and has to check the animals in every

00:16:17.920 movie that they watch every single horse who falls down gets up immediately after and walks away

00:16:22.380 in this movie because i checked and i'm like even on screen they're fine okay good like this movie

00:16:28.740 is only positive vibes truly yes yeah you're right it's a very just like don't worry about

00:16:35.120 the horse is fine yep so the movie starts so the guy who fell off the horse the over the hill

00:16:39.960 former champion is dead by a tree heath ledger with dreadlocks only in this scene um he's looking

00:16:46.360 a lot like the people from that tv show vikings in the sense of being a blonde white man with

00:16:51.320 dreadlocks so he's there and we meet his two pals who are what who is played by how do you say his 0.73

00:16:57.860 last name is it to dick ellen to dyke ellen to dyke who when i rewatch this i'm like oh him

00:17:04.840 like when i first watched it i was just like oh this is a goofy british actor no it's a american 0.77

00:17:10.180 person who's actually blonde playing the red-haired character and i will say later like for a man

00:17:16.800 heavy movie i'm pretty sure they made him go red so he and paul bettany would not be both blonde

00:17:22.280 and i appreciate that and that's what more movies should do to physically differentiate their man

00:17:27.100 characters so we've got what also he's the only one on the cast that's american and you can kind

00:17:34.880 of tell with his accent is shannon saucamon not american i just assumed she was so shannon

00:17:41.840 sauceman is i'm sorry you're right but he's the only alan boy really tried to do an accent and

00:17:48.980 shannon was like sometimes i might scratch my eyes out a little bit yeah i think i feel like it as i

00:17:56.020 was watching this movie i was just like running through our categories i was just like oh my god

00:17:59.460 accent work it's there but also the music we can count that i'm like the costume it's there i was 0.55

00:18:03.580 just like we're gonna have lots to talk about so alan to dyke is there as what the red-haired friend 0.66

00:18:09.760 he is angry that's his defining trait and then Roland is there played by Mark Addy so um Lana 0.97

00:18:16.820 can you explain Mark Addy or why why you like him in this so much I mean he just he he is he is the

00:18:25.360 straight man he's the one that has to be like figuring out all the problems of course I identify

00:18:30.460 with him because he's like um um you gotta wear clothes let's do this um you gotta do like he 0.68

00:18:37.180 wants he just he has big shishi energy he wants to retire but but he can't let his friends down

00:18:43.740 he's the mom friend too like he's literally the mom friend at the point where he starts like

00:18:49.080 sewing i was just like oh this guy he just takes care of everyone and for people that don't know

00:18:55.300 he was robert braytheon in game of thrones that's the only other thing i know him from

00:18:59.220 was he yes we're opposite characters i'm having such a time right now he's also the manager in

00:19:09.280 love actually with bill nye's character do i have to go lay down can i not finish this

00:19:15.300 have we broken this movie for you no you broke robert baratheon for me

00:19:21.260 robert baratheon you deserved to be broken i mean yeah but not not my beautiful beautiful

00:19:27.680 mark adding my favorite childhood great man also my ultimate controversial take which is robert

00:19:33.820 braytheon was john snow's father and i will hear no otherwise we're not getting into game of thrones

00:19:39.060 scandals conspiracy theories on this podcast because i won't do it no nope maybe one day

00:19:45.600 that's not history not even a little maybe one day for charity a lot of charity you guys have

00:19:53.640 to raise so much money honestly yeah that was lana's that was your your offer like you lana

00:19:59.780 will discuss an episode of rain with us but only for charity um i really think if you said that

00:20:05.600 the titsap brigade we might be able to do it right well it could do like a live show and people can

00:20:11.360 watch us and yeah i think patreons if you're interested in that drop however you comment

00:20:16.540 on patreon i don't know like let us know yeah i think i think that is a thing that might happen

00:20:22.380 one day but again like we need to just i have so little knowledge of the stuff in this movie but i

00:20:29.640 could see someone like lana's bff would just be like twitchy about what they're doing with history

00:20:35.200 in the way that lana will be about any episode of rain but um yes that is very much the same vibe 0.90

00:20:42.620 yeah even though she's like specifically an anachronistic performer where they combine all

00:20:47.720 the all of the different periods at the same time it does not matter this one makes her twitchy

00:20:53.100 yeah and it's specifically the soundtrack we will talk about that we will it's coming up

00:20:59.700 if we ever get out of this first scene of the film the first sentence of my synopsis okay

00:21:06.140 so we've got the three guys the three bros um and they're like okay the knight who we all work for

00:21:11.720 is dead but there's like one more joust to do and heath is like well i heath will put on the armor

00:21:17.300 and joust in their place because we need because if i win then we'll get money and we need money

00:21:22.720 because we are poor guys um and this there's a lot of the exposition i appreciate is very clear

00:21:30.940 and just delivered matter of factly throughout so um they set up the stakes of the entire film

00:21:37.520 which is if the nobles find out that he a poor is jousting then they will be in trouble they're

00:21:42.780 like you can't joust you're not a knight but he smiles his he fledger smile i was like oh there it

00:21:48.320 is there's this star quality we all know he's like well i hope they don't find out that i'm a poor

00:21:52.480 person and then we cut to the crowd is clapping um and stomping along to we will rock you and the

00:22:00.320 title a knight's tale comes up and it's tonight uh i just love it so much i love it so much because 0.95

00:22:08.520 it it kicks down the door and says hey bitches this is the kind of movie you're watching enjoy 0.99

00:22:15.020 yourself if you have any complaints you may take them to my ass because i don't care and i love 1.00

00:22:22.380 that so much i know lana came in here wanting to talk about one thing and one thing only and 0.97

00:22:27.980 it is the use of queen in this movie so please go well before i do that i just want to like i have

00:22:34.220 to insert some history into this and the reason why the the poorest weren't allowed to be knights

00:22:39.660 is because it was freaking expensive to be a knight and it literally impoverished like their

00:22:47.500 home districts people were like like overtaxing their their commoners in order to to do the tour

00:22:56.360 so like being a knight was not is not so much hey you have to be a knight look how cool you are it's

00:23:02.020 can you afford this so frankly if a poor person could afford it they'd be like they probably

00:23:08.560 could have been able to figure it out but if a poor person could afford it then they would no

00:23:12.460 longer be a poor person correct because good point that was the only social mobility was the ability

00:23:18.180 to like raise funds and then you could just buy yourself a title if you got rich enough most of

00:23:24.340 the time because the king would be like hey i could really use all of your money that would be

00:23:27.880 which is basically the plot of this movie but um they the use of queen in this movie the one thing

00:23:36.860 i want to point out is that they start out with we will rock you which is a single and the b side

00:23:42.320 of that single which is always played together is we are the champions so the intro and the outro

00:23:48.940 of this movie are a single song and everything in the middle is like this perfect ode to queen

00:23:55.140 and and their whole ideals and as also uh we will rocky was written by brian may the best

00:24:02.900 astronomer in the world astronomer like he's an easy he he went back after freddie died he went

00:24:11.900 back and finished his phd which he put on hold to be a member of queen and became an astronomer and

00:24:17.820 he was one of the um the people that was interpreting the the pluto mission one of the

00:24:24.040 astronomers that was interpreting the pluto mission for um like television and and lena

00:24:29.600 lena could you then say that that brian may changed his stars yes yes he did

00:24:36.460 that's a really good pun for and we're going to talk about in the movie what that means

00:24:45.100 um but if you've watched the movie you'll know the meaning of that so yeah you'll know why i'm

00:24:50.340 so proud of myself so the music is intentionally anachronistic in the same way that i appreciate

00:24:56.300 another well i think the the director said something like he's like well i could have put

00:25:00.120 in like classical music but that also hadn't been written yet like the only music that they

00:25:04.240 would have had would have been like monk chanting so i was like he wanted to make it feel contemporary

00:25:10.860 and fun like the way that going to adjust he wanted us to feel fun not just like oh we're

00:25:16.860 watching an important historical thing and like i respect it and the soundtrack slaps it's great

00:25:20.980 this is how it would have felt to be a peasant at a joust in 13 whatever was happening would make

00:25:26.740 the peasants feel the way the queen makes us feel and so like emotionally it's right yeah but like

00:25:33.320 we're not going to feel that way if someone busts out a lute in a recorder we're going to be like

00:25:37.020 oh something fancy like no it's fun it's old-timey sports yeah it feels very much like in a any sports

00:25:45.020 arena like that the crowd does the wave i think at one point in this opening sequence as well but

00:25:48.960 like the we will rock you like when that plays in whatever a baseball thing or whatever like

00:25:53.520 everyone knows that song that's like a sports song that's also really it absolutely establishes

00:25:58.420 it as a sports movie not a history movie and that's very very important because if you go

00:26:03.160 into an expecting history movie you'll be really really sad i also just really i think it's this

00:26:10.140 opening sequence when the heralds have their trumpets up and it looks like they're playing

00:26:14.520 the guitar solo to we will rock you jump it down the music stops and i'm like i love whosever idea

00:26:19.920 that was that's so good this is the thing this is where i was like wow what else did this director

00:26:24.280 do and i was like nothing else like this like he wrote and directed this like this was his vision

00:26:28.400 from top to bottom and then the fact that he didn't follow it up with anything else that's

00:26:32.380 the same is interesting and kind of too bad hey payback was a very good movie but it was a very

00:26:39.280 different movie that he did and it was like it was a gangster movie almost like an early john wick

00:26:47.580 kind of thing yeah and so like he's always he likes weird stuff but he's mostly been a writer

00:26:53.640 yeah i guess it's all he's just like here's what i'm gonna do this is my weird thing and then like

00:26:58.120 my next thing is gonna be weird in this way and like i respect that too but um so this isn't the

00:27:04.400 first note i have my notes about the extras my favorite character in this movie um so this was

00:27:09.780 filmed you know off the top of your head it was somewhere in europe it was um czechoslovakia

00:27:15.400 prague yeah so the the extras all do not speak english and are just there for a good time and

00:27:22.460 they're just happy they're just delighted to be in a movie a lot of them i think are like homeless

00:27:26.160 people possibly who just like were given work to be so the crowd is so happy to be there um i wrote

00:27:32.880 there's no fingerless gloves to be seen they're all wearing they're not wearing the like poor

00:27:37.740 people colors we've seen in other movies of like light washed out brown they've got like primary

00:27:42.040 colors on the kids have face paint like everyone's just like looks hearty and healthy and just like

00:27:48.520 really happy to be in a movie and there there's this scene later on where the crowd is supposed

00:27:52.620 to be menacing and they are not they're still just like we're in a movie this is so cool

00:27:56.900 so the crowd is like in the same as the horse is getting up like the crowd is just a joy to

00:28:02.700 behold and and yes it was czech republic i am showing my old by saying czechoslovakia

00:28:09.720 yes and i am by not correcting you also showing my old um but also my lack of knowledge of eastern

00:28:16.400 europe entirely so um yeah so the crowd is they're excited uh the rules are explained exposition

00:28:24.340 style i do not care what they are white flags are involved there are rounds so it's very obvious

00:28:30.960 throughout this movie that you do not have to know anything about josting because they'll always tell

00:28:35.000 you immediately after what the characters faces are doing they're like oh that was a good thing

00:28:38.600 oh that was a bad thing okay i don't need to know any facts like oh that's what i think all sports

00:28:44.080 movies should be is i don't ever want to have to know a thing about a sport in order to watch a

00:28:48.480 sport yeah you're right three points exactly but like it's a touch a touch is a point a knockoff

00:28:55.600 is three first to three points there's three rounds lord adamar you want to tell us more

00:29:00.640 yes i am mostly german i love rules the rules are if you are also glad and you like rules they're

00:29:10.140 explained as allison said numerous times throughout the movie and every time my my brain just shuts

00:29:14.760 off i'm like i assume i'll understand what's happening if i don't um if you like rules they're

00:29:21.500 very very clear and easy to follow and new ones keep springing up when a new thing happens so

00:29:27.300 heath wins obviously even though he like has never jousted for real before he's always like he

00:29:32.640 was like the joust the guy who they worked for like he would just opposite him for practice but

00:29:38.160 anyway he's just got the raw goods he's he's got jousting potential so he wins um but then he keeps

00:29:44.960 his helmet on while accepting his prize um to keep his face hidden but also the helmet seam

00:29:49.820 is partially smashed in by the lance anyway his prize is a gold feather statue the prizes are

00:29:58.440 always gold statues which they always hack into pieces to the point where i'm just like why not

00:30:04.100 make the prize be like coins i don't know because most knights wouldn't need the money they'd have

00:30:09.900 the money they would just want the fancy thing most points most knights would be couth enough

00:30:16.080 to take it home to melt it down and they want it in something that's like compact and that they can

00:30:21.360 disguise true okay um so they barter the feather for money and then heath is like let's do this

00:30:28.640 for real let's go on the like jousting tournament circuit and like i'll be a fake knight what and

00:30:37.460 roland are like no we can't do that and then they like literally fight um and then they agree to do

00:30:42.500 it um i just put in my notes because i didn't realize until later but they're in france um

00:30:49.740 that's where the jousting circuit is um it took me a while to realize they are in france for most

00:30:54.520 of this movie and embarrassingly i only realized that when they were going back to england i'm

00:30:58.840 like oh they've been in france this whole time got it okay which they're mostly on the continent

00:31:05.240 between france and they're in france right now but they're like in the continent in my defense

00:31:10.300 everybody speaks english in this movie except for some french french people who show up at one point

00:31:17.920 anyway so they're in french um costume watch um so heath in this throughout the movie actually he

00:31:24.760 wears sort of like a slim fitting linen top and i mentioned slim fitting because watt and ron are

00:31:30.040 wearing size xx large pajamas and he's doesn't have his sleeves ripped off and it's much more

00:31:36.080 fitted to his body and he also has leather chaps that he wears over his like linen pants the

00:31:40.280 other two are in kind of oversized karate geese sort of vibes um and that's how you know he's

00:31:47.940 the main character um training montage set to low rider the song they should have been wearing

00:31:55.520 dresses should they have why is that i mean maybe that maybe some pants but like they just as likely

00:32:03.440 have been wearing dresses because like not dresses dresses but just like a tunic that just covers

00:32:08.740 everything yeah his hose and trousers take a lot of extra work and they're poor right but mark

00:32:14.800 addy does have a way with a needle and thread as we see that is true that is very very true

00:32:19.560 and he might have wanted to like look a little bit uppity by um i don't know putting on pants

00:32:26.660 their clothes are very like one size fits all style so um anyway so heath is like pretty good

00:32:34.140 at this but he you know obviously needs practice the vibe is roland is good at training it's very

00:32:39.860 much like in a boxing movie the guy who like it's very much like the rocky training montage but

00:32:45.480 doing various joust things wats energy is chaotic and angry and by midway through the thing heath

00:32:53.340 has cut off the dreadlocks and now he has sort of a vest added to his outfit it is an extremely good

00:32:59.720 look it's a good look it's definitely a good look and then they run into paul bettany nude who is

00:33:07.100 at the crossroads on the street he's playing famous writer jeffrey chaucer he says briefly 0.92

00:33:12.780 to note that for any of the tits upgrade who have read a tip for the hangman

00:33:17.400 was this chaucer extremely influential on the way i wrote kit marlowe yes yes he was this is

00:33:23.320 very formative to me personally this is my favorite character i love him with all of my heart

00:33:29.280 I can't watch Paul Bettany in Marvel movies

00:33:31.840 because he is always Chaucer.

00:33:33.640 Does I remind me in your book,

00:33:35.860 does Kit Marlowe say,

00:33:37.140 Kit Marlowe's the name, writing's the game.

00:33:40.420 Not in the words, but in the vibes, yes.

00:33:44.380 Because he says,

00:33:45.420 Jeffrey Chaucer's the name, writing's the game.

00:33:48.200 And I thought, that's a great line.

00:33:52.080 Yeah.

00:33:52.880 You also missed,

00:33:53.880 you missed the ultimate pun right there.

00:33:56.220 Which is?

00:33:56.540 Yes, which way they're going.

00:33:57.900 And he said,

00:33:58.380 well this is the road to ruin yes they did which is the french place rouen right

00:34:06.580 um yeah so they're like why are you naked he's like well i've basically taken what you can call

00:34:13.320 an involuntary vow of poverty we find out later that he is a gambling addict and that's why he

00:34:19.420 is but anyway he's like he can write actually i like he's like i'm jeffrey chaucer and they're

00:34:25.940 like he's like no jeffrey chaucer the writer and they're like what's a writer um what are books

00:34:33.060 yeah we are cousins sir but he's like i can write anything you want if you can be a pen and paper

00:34:39.460 and he's listing up the stuff he could write including patents of nobility and heath is like

00:34:44.020 file that information away heath is like i am sir ulrich von lichtenstein from gelderland

00:34:50.720 which is a Catalina de Arraso level pseudonym of ridiculousness um anyway Chaucer is just like

00:35:01.300 the tournament that you're going to requires a family tree going back four generations if you

00:35:05.300 help me get clothes and shoes he'll write up letters of patent for them and they're like I

00:35:10.760 guess we'll do that so Rouen Chaucer presents the paperwork um and enters um they're like which

00:35:19.740 which sports does your knight want to be in and then there's sort of like shields hanging behind

00:35:25.420 the entry guys and he just pokes them that one and that one it's like those are the two sports

00:35:33.340 that he wants to enter in which is sure we need more stick smacking based decision making in the

00:35:39.460 world i think it makes a very satisfying sound yeah i mean it's like a touch screen it's all it

00:35:44.860 yeah yeah this is the old timey ipad is when you whack a shield exactly you can take a long stick

00:35:52.680 and you whack a thing and it's it's a symbol because nobody can read and nobody takes the

00:35:57.680 time to read even if they can read i mean you could just say the sword and the joust but like

00:36:04.020 no but that's what makes this movie next level good they they have this whole setup they don't

00:36:11.160 use it again ever in the movie but it's just like here's how you enter and here's how you

00:36:14.300 choose your categories with this giant whacking stick um so the paperwork for sir ulrich von

00:36:20.700 lichtenstein is presented and then chaucer pieces off to play a game of dice um and then heath who

00:36:28.540 just casually is riding his horse through the crowd no one else is on a horse spots shannon

00:36:32.540 sossaman in a white outfit with hat on and he is in love could you explain this outfit either of

00:36:38.920 you i can't explain but i can explain the horses i think the outfit the outfit is essentially

00:36:47.000 sexy nun i think she's got like a little nun hat and then she's wearing a floor-length 1.00

00:36:52.140 bodycon nun dress with a like a family crest on the back it's a whole look she's committed to it

00:37:01.680 it's she definitely stands out i don't i don't blame heath for that catching his eye and for

00:37:09.320 him falling basically she's wearing all white except for her beautiful face which is and he's

00:37:14.060 just like oh she's beautiful and she's dressed bananas and it's like of course you just fell

00:37:18.620 in love with her at first sight like she stands out quite substantially among everybody else here

00:37:23.440 her later outfits and i'm gonna her outfit journey is one that i really want to track

00:37:31.020 carefully but she does end up in a place that i can only describe as like padme amadala goes to

00:37:37.920 coachella yes that is so accurate so this first outfit is very much like padme amadala

00:37:45.100 doing a diplomatic mission and then it just yeah is this coming out almost the same time

00:37:53.480 as natalie portman star wars i think that that was certainly early 2000s

00:37:59.540 because i want to know what what trend were we following here well the trend we're following

00:38:05.160 is kind of like taking asian culture and mix mixing it twisting it beyond recognition

00:38:14.060 with kind of like a forever 21 aesthetic 0.99

00:38:16.880 um what's that one called the one that she's in oh the phantom menace she's in the middle

00:38:25.180 three phantom menace attack of the clones and yeah when is phantom menace

00:38:29.740 revenge of the sith attack of the clones um yeah so episode one was 1999 and this is 2001

00:38:38.040 yeah and so uh episode two attack of the clones was 2002 so it's like between one and two so what

00:38:45.000 i'm gonna say hot take because in the first film she's just she's not wearing a lot of outfits

00:38:49.180 natalie portman by two and three like so it's more like natalie portman is dressing like shannon

00:38:54.100 Sossaman in this movie I think the influence goes in that direction actually so can you explain the

00:39:00.420 horse Lana why is he wearing a horse riding a horse in a crowd of not horses I mean I can

00:39:04.820 explain why there's no horses there which is horses were ridiculously expensive and no one

00:39:09.020 else had one yes and him riding his horse was kind of him being a show-off snob but that's that um

00:39:18.580 that's the brand new sports guy rides his Lamborghini and picks up the first hot girl

00:39:23.440 he sees that's the sports movie um analog got it so he's kind of showing off here yes um and so

00:39:31.780 he's just like he follows her down the street being like hey like banter banter banter and

00:39:37.340 she's all like i'm a strong independent woman and i'm not gonna like give in to you um he follows

00:39:42.100 her into but she won't reveal her name notably and then he follows her like literally into a church

00:39:46.640 and then a church guy comes up he's like this is a church and he's like oh sorry i like rode my

00:39:52.140 horse i brought my horse into a church also have we seen the church guy in another vulgar peace

00:39:56.840 theater film because his face was so familiar but i forgot he really had a i don't know for a minute

00:40:02.780 i was like is this toby jones but it's not but he's kind of like you can't afford toby jones you

00:40:08.680 get this guy sort of vibe i don't know what's this i should have looked it up that's my bad

00:40:14.180 no and i thought of that too but i didn't what's his actor name do you have the page up it's roger

00:40:20.200 aston grisha griffiths he has a terrell in game of thrones okay everyone in this movie was also

00:40:26.940 game of thrones um they're british it's the law every british person was in game well the thing

00:40:32.080 is that people with um he has a good oldie time like he has a good costume drama face

00:40:39.660 so i feel like he looks like a grumpy priest in an operation he was what he's in he's in movies

00:40:46.720 that we have on our list

00:40:47.660 to eventually watch

00:40:48.520 like Restoration

00:40:49.360 and the Madness of King George.

00:40:50.860 He plays P.T. Barnum

00:40:52.100 in Gangs of New York.

00:40:54.500 Oh, we have to

00:40:55.220 play P.T. Barnum in New York.

00:40:56.080 I'm thinking

00:40:56.880 we are not going to watch

00:40:58.600 Gangs of New York

00:40:59.260 for this podcast.

00:41:00.480 We do not have the time.

00:41:03.440 So many failings.

00:41:07.560 So he's,

00:41:08.480 I think we all just

00:41:09.180 recognize him generically

00:41:10.420 from like all

00:41:11.680 period dramas.

00:41:12.700 He's a known character actor.

00:41:14.440 Okay.

00:41:15.120 He has one line.

00:41:15.960 I got it.

00:41:16.260 district he's been in doctor who but i think again every british actor has been yes oh he was

00:41:22.160 in the tv series the musketeers did you watch that allison sexy tears i feel like that's your

00:41:27.180 vibe though i think it's like a group of young guys who are like historically adjacent i do love

00:41:34.500 historically adjacent dudes i will look into doing hijinks anyway he was in that he played

00:41:39.460 elderly priest perfect he's in the tutors um anyway oh he's sir john hutton i don't know

00:41:50.980 there's a lot of whatever okay there's a lot of you know the tutors is my entire personality so

00:41:55.180 that i'm sure i saw him as man who was also in the two he's in the brothers grim playing the mayor

00:42:01.060 yes I saw that as well so anyway yeah he's just scrolling through this Allison you're not we are

00:42:09.880 and I'll move on from this but it's just all it's all period dramas because he has this oldie time

00:42:14.960 face and look and that's a great niche so um anyway Shannon Sossaman is a strong independent

00:42:22.500 woman who can speak for herself um she also has a lady's maid whose name we learn later is I think 1.00

00:42:27.200 christiana who has like the coolest long hair she's got like waist like long hair with just 1.00

00:42:32.040 like braids in and out of it it makes me want to just grow my hair out and do that with my hair

00:42:35.820 my hair would never look that good second best accent in the show christiana yeah um okay so

00:42:43.200 heath wins his joust and then he heads for the sword fight because he's entered in the two

00:42:47.400 competitions okay so we're getting into the like the canterbury tales of it all a book i have not

00:42:55.560 read although i do believe in high school at some point we read part of it because i do know who the

00:43:00.880 wife of bath is but that's just the only one worth knowing in the can of retails i think so

00:43:06.720 and the woman who farts through a window that's pretty much the highlights yeah so the two people

00:43:13.300 who he's gambling with are apparently characters in the can of retails it's simon the summoner

00:43:18.060 and then some other guy who has a name that's like that and so it's some sort of like deep cut for

00:43:24.200 like the english lit nerds apparently i yeah it was for me i laughed okay okay so like what is the

00:43:32.400 knight's tale in the canterbury tales nothing at all to do with this it is an incredibly boring

00:43:37.560 very long romantic poem that the knight tells when they're on the road and it's about like two

00:43:42.380 brothers locked in a tower and like they should all work like kill each other at some point blah

00:43:47.260 blah whatever okay so because later in this and i'm sure we will talk to it when we get to it as

00:43:53.960 well but jeffrey chaucer is like i will eviscerate you in literature i'm gonna put you on my book 0.91

00:43:59.180 and you're gonna be such assholes so like are they does there's the the idea of the canterbury 0.96

00:44:06.120 tales is like there's like 15 people on the road from london to canterbury on a pilgrimage and 0.99

00:44:10.900 like they all take turns telling stories and so the summoner i think the other one is the partner

00:44:15.560 yeah there are two of the people in the group telling stories and like he goes on and on for 0.99

00:44:21.080 like 500 lines about how ugly and shitty and like pimply and smelly corrupt these people are 0.78

00:44:28.160 it really does he leans in okay so he does eviscerate these guys in literature he does 0.99

00:44:34.460 they suck so yeah so the long-standing tradition of all of it it's it is from the beginning of

00:44:39.760 english writing that we put people we don't like in and say mean things about them it is the way 0.98

00:44:44.080 yeah so these are the guys to whom he owned money anyway so he is heading for the sword fight but

00:44:50.680 then simon the seminar is like hey your guy like owes us money and we took all his clothes

00:44:54.940 um paul bunny nude again i believe and he's like i have a gambling problem and he literally says

00:45:00.560 i have a gambling problem because this movie is not me like they're talking like modern day people

00:45:06.940 and i if you get past that we will rock you like you're not going to mind the fact that a character

00:45:12.440 in like the 1300s is like i have a gambling problem and that's why it's there and that's

00:45:17.240 why it's brilliant filmmaking like here's what we're doing okay so he heads off to the sword

00:45:24.700 fight i appreciate i just noticed here i wanted to point out that so his helmet and throughout

00:45:31.140 this film always has you can see his most of his face through his helmet whereas the people he's

00:45:36.200 fighting against are often just like actual helmets was just a slit for the eyes so you know

00:45:40.900 so you can see heath in his face unless he's hiding his identity except when he's hiding his

00:45:45.580 yeah anyway oh and this is the first time we see chaucer being the hype man um can you talk about

00:45:52.460 chaucer's the hype man allison um i think that what they were going for is like you know in like

00:45:58.520 pro wrestling when vince mcmahon comes out with this microwave microwave with his microphone

00:46:03.760 he's like in this corner the destroyer but i don't watch wrestling i don't know but chaucer

00:46:11.200 is just like really having a great time he is thinking of every single word he's ever heard

00:46:16.000 he's truly off off the off the rails and then this first one i love because the entire audience 1.00

00:46:22.680 is like as you said they're like a bunch of czech people who don't speak english and that's what 1.00

00:46:27.900 they look like when he gives this speech they're just like what bro not a single word of that 1.00

00:46:33.520 meant anything but then but then roland's like yay and everybody's like we're supposed to

00:46:39.020 and that was allegedly this is too perfect to be true but according to the mdb trivia that is

00:46:45.760 actually what happened because the check crowd didn't know they were supposed to cheer then so

00:46:49.040 then mark addy was like yay and then everyone started cheering and they kept it in um and i

00:46:55.960 think when i read that detail i was just like oh i love this check group of extras it was great so

00:47:02.000 they're all um taking care of business plays as we see he's winning sword fighting competitions

00:47:09.700 um but in the course of this he suffered some damage so he's been wearing the armor of the

00:47:15.940 guy who died in the first scene and it doesn't okay i like when i realized that this movie has

00:47:21.780 a lady blacksmith in it i was so excited a scottish it has lady blacksmith the best accent

00:47:30.360 in the entire show she's from glasgow and she does not mitigate her accent whatsoever oh my gosh

00:47:36.860 so he needs to get his breastplate repaired but he has no money because he had to pay off the

00:47:41.860 creditors of chaucer um and so he winds up there's this lady blacksmith but like no one really goes

00:47:48.240 to her because she's a lady blacksmith and he sort of is like oh those guys said that you're

00:47:51.920 not good at being a blacksmith she's like they said that and then she's like okay i'll fix your

00:47:54.840 armor so she's the farrier she she only does blacksmithing for horses oh right right you 0.67

00:48:01.300 know what's blacksmith she's basically a vet as opposed to a doctor yeah but she's yeah she says

00:48:08.740 that she'll fix his armor you're right yeah no this is taking me back i haven't watched my former

00:48:14.360 favorite tv show forged in fire in a while but every now and then the competitive blacksmithing

00:48:19.140 show um on the history channel because it's historical um because they have to do historical

00:48:25.180 weapons anyway there memorably there's one episode where they had a guy on who was a farrier

00:48:29.320 and the judges were all just like look at his hammering technique and he had this different

00:48:33.180 hammering technique they're all just like that's how you know he's a farrier i totally missed that

00:48:37.180 she was a farrier because i'm like oh she's a hammer technique um anyway she's just like a lady 1.00

00:48:43.160 blacksmith and she's fucking awesome and she's the actresses in these shows i have not watched 0.91

00:48:47.480 but maybe people have maybe you have um better call saul and breaking bad she's like a recurring 0.76

00:48:53.400 main character on both those shows good for her i know my husband watched those i assume she does 1.00

00:49:01.200 an american accent but glad to see a scottish woman succeeding but she's so hard to hear 0.97

00:49:08.540 do you have a hard time understanding her accent her scottish accent her scottish accent no okay 1.00

00:49:17.060 good. Do you? No, my great grandfather was Scottish. So I like I have this funny feeling

00:49:25.140 that I know Scots because my grandmother accidentally taught it to me. And I just

00:49:29.060 don't remember and I can never tell if people's Scottish accents are hard or easy. Hers went down

00:49:35.080 nicely. I have watched things like I watch most things with closed captioning now because that's

00:49:40.140 just I don't miss things. But I especially watch things that are like produced in Great Britain

00:49:45.140 with closed captioning

00:49:46.560 because some of those

00:49:47.100 regional accents

00:49:47.780 are just like 1.00

00:49:48.580 they might as well be

00:49:49.440 speaking Icelandic

00:49:50.400 to me

00:49:50.760 like I don't

00:49:51.600 there was one contestant

00:49:53.860 on the most

00:49:54.600 recent season

00:49:55.460 the Great British Baking Show

00:49:56.760 yeah

00:49:57.320 are you talking about

00:49:58.180 that one Scottish man

00:49:59.540 that I was like

00:50:00.040 I didn't understand

00:50:00.540 a single word

00:50:01.140 you said all season

00:50:02.040 yeah

00:50:02.660 yeah

00:50:03.240 he seems so nice

00:50:04.940 I assume

00:50:05.820 no this

00:50:07.520 this actress

00:50:08.300 he was very nice

00:50:09.600 and very cool

00:50:10.400 this Glasgow actress

00:50:11.980 I think she's doing 1.00

00:50:13.180 enough of a Scottish accent 0.93

00:50:14.300 to be like 0.72

00:50:14.720 what a great accent but she also i think is tamping it down enough to be like people in

00:50:18.500 america will understand me because she's a pro and she's so cool she has the glossiest shiniest

00:50:23.860 hair also she's so pretty yeah she's great um the best character in the entire movie and i do 0.78

00:50:31.660 want to just like i want to um also just like recognize and appreciate because she came on

00:50:37.660 the scene i was just like oh god are they going to do some sort of thing where like she ends up

00:50:40.560 with someone with Watt or with Roland no no there's no love story she's just like a lady

00:50:47.320 blacksmith who joins their crew and that is what she does and I love that she just wants to go to

00:50:51.480 Paris yeah what was the name of the actress I don't remember uh Laura Frazier okay she's awesome

00:50:59.460 she's great she's great and I'm glad that she's got a this movie really the careers of everybody

00:51:05.320 in this movie you know he's ledger r.i.p but like mark addy like adam tudyke is doing gangbusters

00:51:11.860 this is like voiceover artists like everyone just really took off from here so they really got a lot

00:51:15.420 of actors who just like went on to be great so which is part why the movie's good they got a lot

00:51:19.340 of they're all great actors as evidenced by their future careers um okay so he's suggesting shannon

00:51:27.520 watches in a hat that i will let allison describe it's the white sort of woven one kind of a bucket

00:51:33.320 oh yeah okay i'm glad you prompted me because um shannon wears many things in this film and

00:51:38.560 it's hard for me to remember but this one is like my grandmother owned one of those like kind of

00:51:46.280 woven bamboo visor hats that you would wear like when you were doing gardening and it looks like

00:51:51.940 that plus a little bit of a mosquito net plus a fence it's like truly incredible like

00:52:00.900 it's got golf club grandma vibes and i'm delighted to see the appearance there is

00:52:08.460 just knowing that you chose this film i was like in terms of this film having everything

00:52:12.940 for you like the the number of hat moments the coat moments i'm just like well this was made

00:52:19.280 just for allison we're gonna talk about the coats i have a whole thing about that or is this why

00:52:23.620 allison likes hats and coats you know i think i don't think it's why i like hats i do think

00:52:30.780 it's why i like coats i'm pretty sure there's a formative coat in this movie that we haven't

00:52:35.280 gotten to yet i noted i noted the coat that i'm pretty sure you're talking about yeah um yeah so

00:52:41.420 shannon sussman this outfit is very asian inspired to me um in some sort of i could picture somebody

00:52:50.460 wearing it in like a joseon set k-drama somehow and then shannon sussman like i looked up i didn't

00:52:58.360 even look at was just like shan sossaman what's her deal and she's it's like she is and it's like

00:53:03.640 irish english blah blah blah so so it's not like shan sossaman has one parent who is chinese or

00:53:09.560 whatever but like she has an asian look to her like you can tell she's part asian you know part

00:53:15.680 part hawaiian filipino part hawaiian filipino yeah so and the outfits that she wears do have

00:53:21.140 an asian influence and then that really works with her look i think although she her character

00:53:25.820 is not a visiting Asian nobility she is very much a French aristocrat anyway she's wearing this

00:53:33.940 amazing hat all for costumes I think if you haven't seen this movie you just need to know 0.71

00:53:37.860 that no one in this movie matches what she's wearing stylistically whatsoever like all of

00:53:43.800 my beloved extras are dressed like the extras from the 1963 Camelot movie like they're wearing

00:53:49.720 medieval times renaissance garb and shannon sossaman is out here in like

00:53:55.020 amadala goes to coachella just like it has nothing to do with what anyone else is wearing

00:53:59.500 and i love it and it just really makes her stand out in a great way

00:54:02.640 this look was bananas um and the hat goes so far down her face the camera angle always has to be

00:54:10.380 looking up at her because it's like that's not a hat you design for the screen because you can't

00:54:16.300 shoot her anything except for down from below anyway she looks amazing rufus sewell comes in

00:54:23.320 sewell do you have feelings about rufus sewell what have you seen him in he's always the bad

00:54:29.820 guy he's just always the bad guy the he was in shakespeare in love right no that's rupert

00:54:36.740 everett god no you're right i get them confused i will not answer this question because i think

00:54:42.360 all my other ones for a second because i have feelings about him it's just they're old feelings

00:54:46.800 he's not the one from north and south but that guy looks like that too is he the one from victoria

00:54:52.920 on he's the one from victoria he was dangerous beauty dangerous beauty is where i know him from

00:55:00.440 i know him from victoria on pbs so he plays the like smoldering prime minister the sexy prime

00:55:04.980 minister the sexy prime minister lana you've not watched victoria on pbs i assume because you hate

00:55:10.160 victoria yeah no i that angers up the blood what a sound you made right there i wish i had that

00:55:17.380 when allison and i both just at the same time said the sexy prime minister lana i think threw up

00:55:22.260 inside her brain um yeah yeah sexy great he's so smoldering i was like oh i just want them to get 0.99

00:55:31.540 together but then albert shows up and i'm just like what is this stupid mustache this is the 0.99

00:55:36.960 most unattractive mustache in the whole show and i'm like look was right there being smoldery and 0.98

00:55:42.660 they had to take him off the show because the chemistry was too good it was too good then you

00:55:47.860 have to watch dangerous beauty at some point because that is him just being smolder all the

00:55:53.180 time and winning his oh good he knows how to do he can do smolder but here he's using a smolder

00:55:58.940 for bad instead of for good it's still working though he's so evil he's so like mustache twirling

00:56:06.620 without a mustache vibes and i'm just like this movie is great this movie is like he's just evil

00:56:12.480 you know he's wearing black all the time in this scene shannon's awesome is wearing all right oh

00:56:17.320 he plays an incredible and he and he's just like visually they both have kind of curly hair but

00:56:22.680 his hair is dark and his hair is light and like his eyes are dark and his eyes are light and it's

00:56:26.540 just like the visual of heath ledger yeah it's great um okay so rufus sewell comes in his

00:56:35.780 characters count adamar and he's just like shannon sassaman me i'm a misogynist and she's

00:56:42.060 like i'm too cool i don't care um meanwhile and then in a weird scene he's ledger's just like oh

00:56:49.620 my god i love her so much but what should i say to her and chasseur's like and whispers for a

00:56:54.220 weirdly long time but then the next scene is not he's saying things so he says things later but

00:57:01.300 that was just an odd thing to me this movie is still perfect but anyway um also there's a guy

00:57:08.040 standing nearby holding a falcon i am not sure why just to really add to this sort of like

00:57:16.320 maleficent like i am evil and here's the bird that accompanies me sort of vibe but that's the

00:57:22.620 guy who i realized more so on the second watch so count adamar's like assistant who just like

00:57:29.840 really has a crush on chaucer and just really wants to be like chaucer yorky harold with his

00:57:36.220 chaucer fanboy crush i love that guy so much yeah he has like a little mini arc that like pays off

00:57:44.300 at the end it's cute and that guy's also been in so many things mostly costume dramas um so

00:57:52.080 heath and adam are they like parry they're like like you're you're not a good knight you're not

00:57:58.200 a good night anemar is like your armor is like old and shanna's awesome and it's like i don't

00:58:02.040 mind a vintage look um so then chaucer comes out to hype the crowd for he's appearance he like

00:58:10.060 these parts the sports scenes are very much just like sports occur in my notes anyway so the notes

00:58:17.020 say he's jousts yeah yeah um i read the uh i think it was written by roger eber because this

00:58:25.720 came out well before he died but roger ebert's review was like the jousting scenes he's like

00:58:30.120 they take what would be in person five seconds and make it 30 seconds and i'm like yeah they do

00:58:36.100 because just like every time there's a joust it's like slow motion his face his face his face his

00:58:40.820 face the horse horse's feet his face his face where it's like in real life that would not take

00:58:46.320 as long as it takes but i don't mind again perfect movie so heath is like winning and the guy who he's

00:58:52.220 jousting is like i've never not seen a joust through when i wish to leave with my honor intact

00:58:55.980 so for the third round they both just like hold up their lances and don't joust because this shows

00:59:00.300 heath is a good guy not going to kick a guy while he's down um shannon sossaman is like oh he shows

00:59:07.180 mercy um and adamar is like me what's wrong with him so then the next scene is the others heath

00:59:15.140 and mark addy are lying sort of like in the tent where they're staying for the tournament it's like 0.62

00:59:20.320 a fur rug and it's like their two heads are in frame um adam to dyke's feet are in frame and 0.78

00:59:26.880 he's ledger is just like it's big romeo montague energy he's just like oh my love my lady like 0.98

00:59:31.520 he's so in love um he still doesn't know her name it's like

00:59:37.740 because it just really reminds me of romeo from romeo and juliet but in a non-annoying way in a

00:59:44.080 really sweet adorable way um kind of like having Shakespeare in love how Joseph Fiennes was just

00:59:50.580 like pouring himself over furniture just being like oh my love like Heath Ledger takes it in

00:59:56.640 a different direction that's just kind of like I like her so much that's just like cute and then

01:00:00.680 we're all like I really like you too so that's good it's just sweet it's cute still doesn't know

01:00:06.020 her name notably um so the next scene Shannon Sossaman and Christiana her maid are in her

01:00:13.880 castle room and this is the only scene in the whole movie where shannon sassaman is wearing

01:00:19.080 just like a traditional medieval long hair wig and i feel like they shot this and they were just like

01:00:24.300 not weird enough because they saw the dailies and they're just like we gotta change up this

01:00:30.580 look entirely because they do um anyway she's like my like sir ulrich that's basically the scene

01:00:38.020 um oh no she's like the maid is like oh would you like do you want count adamar to win and

01:00:43.860 shannon sassman's like no then the maid is like do you want heath ledger to win and shannon's like

01:00:47.920 maybe and that's so she likes him back um next day heath is jousting opposite count adamar

01:00:57.560 christiana for that is the name of the cute maid

01:01:00.740 um presents him with a scarf to be like my lady wants you to wear this

01:01:06.920 her name she wants me to tell you her name is jocelyn um i'm still gonna call her shannon 0.98

01:01:12.380 Sossaman because that's a better name so in this scene Shannon Sossaman is wearing a yellow dress 0.98

01:01:21.640 her hair is in like a half sunshine of spikes like a half circle sticking like she's a bun 1.00

01:01:31.620 and then just like a half circle of just hair standing out straight like it this is the look

01:01:38.580 that stayed with Anne for 15 years yeah yeah I was just like she's awesome man she's into a band

01:01:43.580 she has spiky hair I was just like that's it that's that's look I recall you said that on one

01:01:47.880 of these other podcasts and we were talking about we were going to watch that I was like oh yes I

01:01:50.940 remember the spiky hair scene it's very striking yeah well and to go from like we saw her in the

01:01:56.220 like nun outfit with white hat then we saw her with like long hair and now this is the her look 0.77

01:02:01.580 and she sticks to this look for the rest of this film which is Coachella realness um she looks

01:02:07.940 amazing so um and i think she's wearing this outfit when he's like you're like the sun i'm

01:02:13.260 like literally she's wearing a yellow dress and her hair is shaped like a child's drawing of the

01:02:17.140 sun so um the crowd cheers for ulric and adamar is mad because ulric aka heath doesn't joust with

01:02:25.140 style or technique he's got just this raw new this is like in um i don't know if either of

01:02:30.980 you know this reference lana might in um strictly ballroom where they're like new steps new steps

01:02:38.060 like the guy it's a ballroom dancing competition and he's like inserting new steps and there's

01:02:42.580 all these australian people just being like new steps new steps and they're all shocked and appalled

01:02:47.400 um not done no no he's not jousting in the like traditional jousting way

01:02:53.860 just raw talent and then heath has a flashback of being little kid heath i have to say really

01:03:00.300 good casting little baby heath is so cute it's such a cute little kid with tan skin and like

01:03:06.440 blonde curly hair it's like yeah that's a little heath would look like and he remembers being a

01:03:11.320 little boy watching the nights on parade whilst crouched on what's that thing called the wooden

01:03:16.780 thing with the guys so there's like a guy in the stocks and little heath is on top of it

01:03:23.540 and the best part is when the guy in stocks like joins in the conversation casually

01:03:28.140 anyway he's like sees them and he tells his dad like one day i'll be a knight like them and the

01:03:34.040 guy in the stocks is like you can't change your stars and little heath is like dad can i can

01:03:39.600 someone change their stars and the dad is like yeah you can because he's a good dad

01:03:43.560 um i recently went through copy edits on my second book and um my copy editor flagged a phrase in one

01:03:52.540 of my sentences which is like this seems like an unusual turn of phrase is this the way the usual

01:03:56.680 idiom goes and i looked at it what i had written down was can a man change their stars and i said

01:04:01.480 no this is a quote from 2001's film and i had to take it out so when i say this is formative

01:04:10.160 i mean it changed the way my brain works yeah

01:04:13.260 that's too bad you can't keep that in just as a little shout out i could have pushed but i was

01:04:20.520 like you know what i don't want to explain that to people your first book was effectively jeffrey

01:04:25.860 chaucer as the main character so like yeah right in that still the shout outs are there yeah okay

01:04:32.000 so meanwhile back in the joust heath is semi-unconscious while on the horse and oh sorry

01:04:36.980 i looked down or something somehow adamar got the scarf from him like he hit him real hard

01:04:43.780 is what and did the scarf get on his lance like he did that he like stabbed him okay with the

01:04:50.520 yes yeah okay so then adamar gets the scarf and then he like goes up to the stands with the

01:04:56.300 scarf on his lance and he's like here's shannon and she's like okay you're gross um anyway so

01:05:04.480 heath wins the sword competition but adamar wins the joust category slash also he's the tournament

01:05:10.140 champion and then they say these lines that are said 75 more times in the movie and heath is like

01:05:16.340 next time i face you you will be flat on your back and adamar is like you have been weighed

01:05:20.560 you have been measured and you've been found wanting and these are formative statement like

01:05:27.800 that statement was to you alice and can a man change his stars because these two men just

01:05:32.080 repeat these lines back to each other throughout the entire rest of the movie

01:05:34.920 they do that is so heath is now like i don't want to divide my tension between the sword

01:05:44.880 fighting and the jousting i'm gonna only focus on the joust now so i can be tournament champion

01:05:49.460 um he breaks off a piece of his gold statue trophy to pay off chaucer's debts

01:05:54.380 oh and this is where chaucer is like i will eviscerate you too in fiction

01:05:58.180 and they're like okay and turns out he did so um and then in a plot twist i loved the lady

01:06:09.020 blacksmith is like your armor doesn't really fit you like i can make you better armor that fits you

01:06:12.860 better and a payment i just want like a ride as far as paris so then she breaks off a piece of

01:06:18.200 the statue which is what she is owed for to make this new armor out of we're gonna talk like when

01:06:22.980 like basically i think vibranium is the metal that she invents um anyway so heath wants to head out

01:06:33.200 on foot to the next tournament to like save the horse's energy but chaucer's like no you have to

01:06:36.980 go to the banquet tonight and then christiana shows up asking what color will heath be wearing

01:06:42.060 because shannon wants to match because shannon like cares about a whole look ensemble and roland

01:06:48.480 is like he eyes a nearby tent and he's like um green with trimmed in a kind of pale green with

01:06:55.360 wooden toggles and it's big maria von trapp sound of music energy he's going to make the tent

01:07:00.060 fabric into a tunic and he's like but this is a disaster i don't know how to dance

01:07:06.800 so cut to chaucer is trying to do what is our second time on this podcast reviewing a scene

01:07:15.300 in which a dude teaches the main character to dance by banging a stick on the ground the first

01:07:19.960 one was ben affleck and shakespeare in love these are both my picks oh that's right he's like are you

01:07:25.400 a lady mr kent same scene i look forward to this happening in one of your books maybe it's a matter

01:07:36.200 of time at this point so again so um chas is trying banging with a stick like again

01:07:43.960 stick banging has a big part in this movie so he is dancing with watt while roland is sewing up

01:07:50.160 the tunic off in the side dance rehearsal is not going well until lady blacksmith comes in

01:07:55.040 her character has a name but i just call her lady blacksmith and she her name is kate kate 0.88

01:08:00.720 hate the lady blacksmith comes in and then she's a better dance teacher and then it's very cute

01:08:07.420 and then my favorite line she says to heath you're not going to wear your hair like that are

01:08:11.200 you and heath is like is there another way to wear my hair it's so cute um banquet the man has

01:08:19.860 never seen a comb in his life leave him alone he doesn't need one he looks great as is yeah no he's

01:08:26.080 he's a natural beauty um although earlier on like he did have the sort of dreadlocks that a white

01:08:33.240 person gets by just never washing or brushing their hair which is aka tangles um banquet

01:08:40.160 shannon sauceman is wearing green to match him with punky hair with color extensions

01:08:46.360 all spiky very s club seven meets gem in the holograms by way of coachella and fraggle rock

01:08:52.620 do you know any of those references any at all me yeah you i know fully three of the four

01:09:00.780 thank you very much which ones the only one i don't know is gem in the holograms okay what

01:09:06.420 okay that's worse than s club seven i was a 90s kid i know what s club seven is i've watched the

01:09:13.820 show you don't know what gem in the holograms is and that's that's a racial gap and that was

01:09:19.880 if we did

01:09:20.640 Velgar Peace Theater

01:09:21.320 Gem in the Holograms

01:09:22.180 you would see the development

01:09:23.020 of my entire

01:09:24.340 personality

01:09:25.680 interests

01:09:27.200 music sense

01:09:28.880 she was a computer 0.71

01:09:29.600 and aesthetic 1.00

01:09:30.960 yeah

01:09:32.200 anyway

01:09:33.020 but S Club 7

01:09:34.020 I think had

01:09:34.640 a similar sort of

01:09:35.460 spiky hair

01:09:36.280 situation 1.00

01:09:37.640 especially Tina 1.00

01:09:38.440 if you know that show

01:09:39.320 slash band

01:09:40.600 um

01:09:41.460 anyway 0.91

01:09:42.060 Shannon Sussman looks

01:09:42.920 spectacular

01:09:44.100 um

01:09:46.240 Adam R

01:09:47.780 is like

01:09:48.200 Sir Ulrich

01:09:48.760 why don't you show us

01:09:49.500 a dance of gelderland and he's like sure i will and he steps up and he improvises a mixture of

01:09:55.040 the steps that he was taught by kate the lady blacksmith he demonstrates it kind of uncertainly

01:10:00.880 and it's cute it's kind of like swing your arms to the side swing your arms to the side and it's

01:10:06.580 kind of it's not going well but then shannon sassman hops in and she's like clap and then

01:10:12.000 everyone's like oh now that's a good dance because she like has that's what was missing once there's

01:10:17.160 clapping well and once shannon sauceman is doing it like oh now it looks cool so then everyone is

01:10:22.580 dancing and it all speeds up and it's sort of like they're all doing like the electric slide

01:10:26.660 a little bit in time with each other the song that plays is called golden years by david bowie

01:10:32.000 not a song i knew but i looked it up and found out that's the song and it's great

01:10:36.680 um it's it's a great dance scene um cut to kate the lady blacksmith is smelting armor using her

01:10:45.380 experimental new steel she carves two nike swooshes into it and she's like that's that's

01:10:51.800 my trademark two nike product placement yep they did every time you say kate the lady blacksmith

01:11:00.480 i sing it in my head to top the magic dragon and i just want everyone else to suffer through that

01:11:04.520 no that's great that's good um okay so she's smelling the armor using her new steel

01:11:12.380 and he thrives the next day and he puts it on he's like but it's so light and she's like it's

01:11:17.540 a new steel i invented it's strong but also light they test it it does great it's like before we

01:11:24.420 were recording i was explaining it's very cold where i live today but in my lifetime there's

01:11:30.100 been a switch over from like big winter parkas like they were big and full of down but now

01:11:35.960 there's like you can get a thin parka and it's like well that's not going to keep you warm but

01:11:39.120 it uses technology so it's like a smaller coat but it keeps you warm and that's what she's done

01:11:44.640 with steel apparently she's made a new lighter steel it's just as strong folded it she invented

01:11:53.920 oh my god what's the word anyway it's been so long since i watched my favorite show

01:12:01.000 portion of fire damascus yeah she's invented a multi-layer she's relocated damascus steel

01:12:08.140 yeah yeah so anyway the armor is great fits them great time for the next tournament at which

01:12:16.260 shannon sossman is in black um and with the boob dress yes so she's wearing a dress that is 1.00

01:12:24.580 sheer from like top neck to waist so you see like the full side circumference of her breasts yes

01:12:33.220 it is such a 90s look like this is early 2000s British Spears the VMAs it's incredible yeah so

01:12:41.800 I wrote she's in black with a hat and a dress that has a sheer panel down the front showing

01:12:46.240 a lot of cleave I don't remember what the hat was but it's really the boobs are the statement 1.00

01:12:51.320 I wasn't looking at the hat during this who knows was she wearing a hat maybe she wasn't

01:12:57.960 I don't know.

01:12:58.460 I can tell you.

01:12:59.480 Apparently,

01:13:00.120 it had some involved.

01:13:01.080 Anyway,

01:13:02.160 so,

01:13:02.540 Adamar's hype man,

01:13:03.740 the cute little guy

01:13:04.880 who had the Falcon earlier,

01:13:06.840 is, like,

01:13:07.260 doing his best,

01:13:08.200 kind of trying to be like Chaucer,

01:13:09.460 hyping up the crowd for Adamar, 0.74

01:13:11.360 while Chaucer distracts him

01:13:12.560 by shining a mirror at him

01:13:14.140 that's, like,

01:13:14.500 reflecting the sun, 0.98

01:13:15.600 just kind of like a jerk thing to do, 0.97

01:13:17.540 but, you know, 0.98

01:13:18.080 charming.

01:13:19.460 But then,

01:13:20.220 the person who Adamar was going to joust

01:13:21.580 is recognized as Edward the Black Prince,

01:13:25.100 identifiable by the little cross-shaped

01:13:27.960 tattoo on his cheekbone that you can see when he opens his helmet halfway and i appreciate that

01:13:33.900 because then i knew every time it was him again because he's a very okay james purefoy is the

01:13:39.160 actor i've heard that name but i don't know him as an actor and so i find him very generic looking

01:13:44.140 so i appreciate that they put again this movie was looking for people like me

01:13:48.100 with borderline face blindness of men and put a tattoo on his face so i'm like well that's edward

01:13:55.040 the black prince face tattoo lana can you tell us who edward the black prince is irl

01:14:01.400 he started the hundred years war oh so significant bookends for all the movies we've been watching

01:14:10.080 we've been watching the end of the hundred years war he's the beginning of the hundred years war

01:14:15.060 um at the siege of calais he and his dad um he is uh the first duke of cornwall which is the first

01:14:23.740 duke of england he like he is the first duke of all number one for him there were none and then

01:14:31.960 there was him and so that's why prince charles when prince charles was prince charles he was

01:14:37.720 the duke of cornwall like that went down to that through that family line um but all the other

01:14:44.180 duchies were created after that one uh he was also one of the he's like the third english no he was

01:14:51.240 the second english prince of wales so like this is old history he was scary in france like in

01:15:01.460 england they're like oh he's a really impressive guy and he does stuff in france he was the scariest

01:15:06.560 freaking dude that um nobody actually called him a black prince at the time they actually like

01:15:10.880 that was a name that they came up with or because there were too many prince edwards and it got

01:15:16.700 confusing yep yeah it does but they do that every time it becomes confusing or could we

01:15:26.160 you know brainstorming like not name everyone the same name these are my thoughts that would

01:15:31.900 be amazing but no okay so edward okay so he's like a badass did he eventually become king or

01:15:41.040 did he die like in battle before he became king he died um his plague too long no i don't think

01:15:48.220 he died i can't say it's probably give me a second give me a second um 0.96

01:15:53.100 crap i had this all written down and then i got 0.83

01:15:58.160 dug into the black plague and now i'm i'm too far i'm 0.99

01:16:02.060 got the wrong black teeth 0.99

01:16:05.920 edward the black plague no damn it if they named the black plague edward also just to talk with me 0.72

01:16:16.560 this was supposed to happen like during the same point as the black plague and and of course i was

01:16:22.440 really excited for black plague but there's no black plague and i'm very very sad no no no

01:16:26.760 he died of dysentery wait he died of dysentery yes he was not forging the river but he did die

01:16:33.700 of dysentery that's a that's a big one the poo in the water yeah also lena i i understood that

01:16:41.400 reference i i appreciate that thank you thank you i mean it is a meme now so i don't expect you to

01:16:49.320 um yeah he left gifts for his servants and like yeah he died of dysentery just a little bit early

01:16:55.220 so he was the father of richard the second no that's not there wait yeah wait the third who

01:17:02.540 is no no richard the second he's from the he's he's from the play right yes yeah the play called

01:17:09.520 richard the second that's the one he's in this he's in the holocron he's played by oh i love

01:17:16.240 yeah that guy the he it was so good he um the actor who played him he said he based his performance

01:17:24.440 off of michael jackson and when you watch the hollow crown you see that yeah oh you're right

01:17:28.840 you're right okay so we're just inching towards the shakespeare play people yeah yeah

01:17:35.160 where yeah his his dad was edward the third his great-grandfather was edward longshanks

01:17:43.960 so it's like very very early days of england and where england is being the worst to everybody

01:17:50.320 but back when they were still giving their king their king's fun names like

01:17:54.260 long shanks we should bring that i prefer that to the black prince i forgot to choose my name

01:17:59.660 wikipedia says um this guy was regarded by his english contemporaries as a model of chivalry

01:18:05.440 and one of the greatest knights of his age and that the french thought he was the worst

01:18:10.920 most atrocity driven dude they've ever seen his wife is philippa of heino who is a person who's

01:18:18.820 on my list of people to read about so apparently he had a cool wife um but what we don't know is

01:18:26.440 did he go to jousting tournaments incognito yes yes he did he did father because it was against

01:18:33.060 the law for them to participate in joust but they really really liked it so they faked their way in

01:18:38.180 wait so it was so you couldn't joust if you were poor because you couldn't afford it but then if

01:18:42.480 you're the king you also can't joust because it's too dangerous or what yeah because um that's

01:18:46.960 remember remember catherine de medici's husband the splinter in the eye and by splinter i mean

01:18:54.220 lance higher land it's called the lance hello it was a very large splinter in the eye um but yes

01:19:03.020 that that that set us down a road of history that led us to the last movie i was reading about that

01:19:10.580 guy but um catherine demetri's husband for something else and he when he was young like

01:19:17.740 but like a soothsayer or somebody said like you're gonna die in a jousting tournament he's like great

01:19:22.820 i'll just never joust then no problem but then like there was like a ceremonial like just for

01:19:28.100 fun jousting tournament and then that's what he got the splinter in the eye from he like 0.99

01:19:32.920 of what are you doing jousting sexy nostril um he knows his shit so anyway edward as in a 0.97

01:19:43.680 historically accurate moment in this film um is recognized and so then adamar withdraws because 0.98

01:19:51.900 he's like i'm not gonna joust against like i read the black prince like no sorry i have too

01:19:56.260 much respect for him and also i can't just him that will be i don't know treason or something

01:20:01.700 it's like against the law for english people to joust their prince but but then i love that he

01:20:06.580 would just show up and try to do it anyway that that look on his face so he's so disappointed

01:20:13.640 sad and disappointed like he just wanted to kickball with his friends at recess and they

01:20:20.600 wouldn't let him and i know that there's been moments like that in like contemporary things

01:20:24.860 you know where like a movie star goes incognito in a small town and then has such a nice time

01:20:30.660 until somebody recognizes him and then he can't like do the fun stuff anymore it's just it's that

01:20:34.800 vibe again i don't know it's very very big in k-dramas very very big in hallmark christmas

01:20:40.960 movies yes so but heath's team um so chaucer finds out who edward is and he's like oh my god

01:20:48.340 you have to withdraw heath and he is like a kindred spirit in disguise like me no not like

01:20:55.580 you he quite the opposite he and he agrees to just against him um and then he just like starts

01:21:01.220 writing like he's like okay withdraw and he's like no i'm he just starts writing and edward's

01:21:06.800 like yeah let's go someone's gonna just me yes um and then afterwards giddy happy boy face

01:21:13.600 he's so happy and then afterwards edward is like you knew it was me yet still you rode and heath

01:21:20.060 is like yes because i'm cool and edward is like well maybe this is going to come back later in

01:21:24.960 the movie that i respect you for being a cool guy spoiler it does come back you've got chivalry man

01:21:31.380 lots of chivalry he does it's like in a sports movie when the guy's like you got gumption kid

01:21:37.340 yep so he wins a tournament but because asterix adamar didn't fight against edward the black

01:21:45.220 prince so it's kind of like not a complete victory here's a scene i hope you can explain

01:21:50.020 to me narratively what's happening because i didn't understand this beat so shannon comes

01:21:55.460 to ask him what color is he gonna wear to the banquet tonight and he's in a bad mood and he's 0.99

01:21:58.720 like why do you only care about clothes you're just a silly girl and she's like better a silly 0.98

01:22:02.920 girl with a flower than a silly boy with a horse and stick and that's where watt says it's called 0.98

01:22:07.600 a lance hello why is he mad at shannon and thinks she's so frivolous for this he's mad in general 0.89

01:22:15.560 that adamar uh withdrew and he's having emotions and men are bad at having emotions and so he

01:22:21.860 lashes out at the at her having a good time because like the next scene is big boy feelings

01:22:26.960 yeah okay okay because the next scene is him being like i miss her so much i'm going to write her

01:22:31.040 love letter and i'm like aren't you mad at her weren't you like literally just mad at her but

01:22:34.820 he wasn't mad at her he was just being a little bit he can't regulate his emotions even though

01:22:39.820 that is entirely a modern thing and and we do not attribute to middle ages what is true for

01:22:48.860 post world wars right but validity but this is a movie that where chaucer is self-aware of his

01:22:55.160 gambling problem so yes and also he has toxic masculinity okay so now we're in bordeaux um

01:23:05.180 jousting happens chaucer reports and then oh yeah he's like where's admar and chaucer is like he's

01:23:11.320 been called to go be in the war so he won't be competing heath is mad 100 years war oh edward 0.64

01:23:17.000 the black prince has started it now yeah okay at any point that chaucer is a grown-up the hundred 0.86

01:23:23.880 years war is happening okay because the black prince is slightly older than the hundred than

01:23:28.600 chaucer there was some exposition at the beginning of the movie about like

01:23:32.780 um i think edward but then also adam are it's like oh why are they able to do the tournament

01:23:38.180 are they busy being in the war and there's some reason why it's like no they're not in the war

01:23:42.280 right now they can do the tournament like someone said something about it like um war was very

01:23:48.100 seasonal back then oh because you had you had to go home and make sure that all your crops got

01:23:53.540 like mostly during the summer was wartime which is really inconvenient because germany is usually

01:24:01.140 where you have the wars and that's where most of the grain was grown so like it it did kind of bad

01:24:06.520 things to economies but this is also just like mid slash post black plague so like there's one

01:24:13.860 third as many one to half to one third as many people in all of europe than there was three years

01:24:19.460 prior so like they're killing each other after a plague that killed 50 33 to 55 50 percent of

01:24:28.260 everyone that caught it so there's like lots of space and lots you don't need that much grain

01:24:34.240 is what you're saying they don't need as much grain as they were growing before so they had

01:24:38.260 more time to have more war but they only do the war it's like oh it's a war season like let's just

01:24:43.480 go do war for three months then it's farming season okay and then it was farming go home take 0.72

01:24:48.600 it in and then come back and do more and then you plant it and then you come back and have more war

01:24:53.720 that's that's how you ward back in them times so it's war season but it's overlapping with

01:25:01.080 tournament season and so now heath is just kind of like i'm winning but i'm mad because i want

01:25:05.620 to face off against my nemesis um and he also misses shannon's awesome so he gets the team

01:25:13.880 the squad his bros plus kate the lady blacksmith who's also his bro who's also a bro yeah she's a

01:25:22.160 lady bro um to write a love letter bro okay well when you say lady in front of it it makes it better

01:25:29.800 to me which is why i do it okay he's a lady bro which is better than a regular bro you can have

01:25:34.560 your gender and i'll have mine yeah um okay so the bros are helping heath write a love letter

01:25:42.560 to shannon sossaman they each contribute a nice thought about someone who they love and also miss

01:25:48.680 um is this where we find out that kate the lady blacksmith is a widow or we already knew that

01:25:56.400 because that's why she's a lady blacksmith because she like inherited the blacksmith biz 1.00

01:25:59.740 from her dead husband they confirm it here for sure yeah so they'll sort of share a cute nice

01:26:05.860 thought and then he chaucer writes it into a nice letter um which is delivered to shannon by

01:26:12.520 what and she is moved by how poetical it is um then we're at a tournament what returns

01:26:20.860 and he's wearing sort of like a pink floral allison i'm looking ahead in your notes go ahead

01:26:28.220 but what is wearing well no i'm looking at you because he's wearing sort of a pink floral yes

01:26:35.980 a mono host coat yeah that's they're rich now they have nice clothes that's a new look for him

01:26:43.160 yeah so he arrives and he's like i delivered the letter um he passed us along a kiss that 0.99

01:26:49.360 shannon wanted him to send to heath heath is overjoyed he's not like oh man kissing me like

01:26:54.780 that was not his vibe at all he's just like oh my god she sent me a kiss amazing and he's just

01:26:58.940 like so happy about it she likes me back okay Chaucer is wearing a very cool duster coat with

01:27:06.180 black fur collar I feel like Allison may have feelings about you correct um yeah this is the

01:27:13.360 coat that got me into coats I just love it so much because it looks both incredibly like

01:27:20.900 luxe and rich and also like he just crawled out of the pair of sewers and like a muskrat is on 0.95

01:27:27.620 his back and i love it so it doesn't make any sense and i love it so they miss paris sewers 0.92

01:27:32.700 or um queen margot paris sewers i think queen margot because at least the coat isn't actually

01:27:39.340 covered in shit okay okay we are we are sanitary but it's just it's oh i want one so if listeners

01:27:46.840 if any of you know where i can get paul bettany's second coat in this film call me i will buy it 0.97

01:27:53.080 And Paul Bettany, the way he wears the clothes in this movie,

01:27:57.280 and I was thinking about this with Shannon Sossaman as well.

01:27:59.340 Like some of these outfits on another person would be like, okay,

01:28:02.140 but on these actors, they just like kill.

01:28:04.900 Like Paul Bettany is wearing the hell out of this coat and his pants.

01:28:08.780 He's got kind of like bell-bottom pants that he's so tall.

01:28:11.760 I think he's wearing leather bell-bottom pants in the scene. 0.99

01:28:14.800 And I'm just like, my man, you're 80% limbs 0.98

01:28:17.620 and you're using every inch of them to wear those pants. 1.00

01:28:20.340 Good for you.

01:28:21.020 He looks so good.

01:28:21.860 it's it's also sort of like 70s rock star vibes yeah yeah very 90s very very 90s it's very like

01:28:30.140 90s reinterpretation of 70s vibes yes oh the coat he was like and you could tell he loved this coat

01:28:41.060 he was like the way he's wearing it and just kind of like twirling practically it's like

01:28:45.520 did he take this coat after the movie ended maybe um this coat deserved to be like

01:28:52.220 and also with in the credits might

01:28:54.820 um okay so then they're in a pub this is a scene with the french people

01:29:02.660 so charleston gets the others so he's like hey there's a bet that like is he's gonna win this 0.92

01:29:08.080 tournament or somebody else and the people we're betting against are the most cartoonish french

01:29:12.820 people here are some of the quotes of the french people say english legs are unsteady on french

01:29:19.920 soil french wine is too much for english bellies you did leave out my favorite exchange please

01:29:27.180 which is eddie the pope is french and then uh roland stands up and says yes well the pope may

01:29:34.560 be french but jesus is english and i just i love that so much most english saying anybody has ever

01:29:40.460 i know it's funny and i'm also like yeah they probably do believe that

01:29:45.500 that was what won him over because yeah roland wasn't gonna be in on the bet but then that 0.98

01:29:51.220 wins him over because they just like hate these fucking french guys so much they're just like 0.97

01:29:54.460 yeah and then we have the roy kent song yeah we do what's that he's blonde he said he comes from 0.99

01:30:03.280 elder land Roy Kent you have not seen Ted Lasso no that's a that's a sports show with men in it

01:30:13.480 so no I have not seen Ted Lasso but but Roy Kent is the exact kind of man that you would like

01:30:19.480 is he blonde and tan no no he's a he's a swarthy man a short-haired dark short dark-haired man

01:30:29.500 who is extremely gruff and has a very low voice

01:30:32.680 and says the most feminist things anyone can say 1.00

01:30:36.360 and look like that.

01:30:37.720 He looks like a non-player character

01:30:40.380 from Grand Theft Auto is what Roy Campbell.

01:30:42.760 No, I've seen who that actor is.

01:30:44.160 He's pictured with the Muppets a lot.

01:30:46.460 I'm not sure why.

01:30:47.660 Yeah, but he is very emotionally self-aware

01:30:50.760 and he has this speech, I'll send you the clip,

01:30:54.580 where this woman's out on a date

01:30:57.420 and he's dating her best friend

01:30:58.880 and the best friend's like he's really this guy's really nice and he's he's just really nice and 0.96

01:31:04.100 and you should it's great and you should stay together and Roy's like oh that's bullshit or 0.72

01:31:09.020 something like he swears a lot and then he goes he goes you shouldn't be with somebody that's nice 0.95

01:31:14.420 or okay like you deserve somebody that sweeps you off your feet you need like sparkle makes 0.96

01:31:20.220 you feel like you've been struck by fucking lightning yes I got you he is the best girlfriend 0.97

01:31:27.820 you could ever have yeah but that's my right kid and he cannot make you watch head lasso for this 0.99

01:31:36.180 podcast unfortunately is not on theme but i do think you would like it i mean i think you would

01:31:41.440 enjoy it i mean agree to despite all the boys despite all the boys it's actually very good

01:31:46.980 you would watch it for keely and you'd have a good time anyway sorry we're moving on it's the

01:31:53.240 kind of boys we wish we had i respect people like that show um i'm busy watching singles

01:32:00.500 inferno right now on netflix it's a korean dating show and that's where incredible title that's

01:32:07.260 where i am i'm watching murder she wrote and learning how to be a professional author from

01:32:10.720 jessica fletcher yeah you are like if we're talking about things that are foundational

01:32:15.700 in the creation of someone's personality that is it and me here's what no this is what you do

01:32:22.220 have one book published in the first episode of season one by episode five have somehow like

01:32:27.080 five more published all of them bestsellers travel the world be doing keynote addresses

01:32:32.400 solving murders right i okay another side no but on this one at one point she sold the rights to

01:32:41.720 her first book to a producer the producer was like totally butchering it and turned it into

01:32:46.440 like a sex romp slasher flick she snuck onto the set and was eventually accused of his murder

01:32:54.700 and gets arrested for it she's like that's fair i did have motive 0.99

01:32:58.680 just the biggest mood of any author there's i'm going to say one more murder she wrote thing

01:33:08.260 because i will well we're paused we're paused while we're on this i'm sorry no so there's an

01:33:15.400 episode like later on in a series like when we're well into the 90s where a virtual reality company

01:33:21.460 is adapting has hired her to write a murder mystery for virtual reality but this is virtual

01:33:26.920 reality headsets circa 1993 and so it's like angela lansbury in this booth with these goggles

01:33:34.560 on and this glove just being like oh it's so realistic and i was just like man i'd love to

01:33:39.980 have a thing i wrote be adapted into an insane virtual reality thing in 1990 but she's just like

01:33:44.460 any new technology she's like on board with it and i respect her for that it's such a good show

01:33:49.500 i'm really delighted you're watching atlanta every time jerry orbach shows up it's just like

01:33:55.260 i love him um so he's tall or he's blonde he's tan he comes from gelderland

01:34:03.640 that too heath goes into a big church this is a great weird scene so shannon sassaman looks at

01:34:13.420 her reflection in the holy water um she looks great obviously with manic pixie spiky hair on

01:34:21.540 top and long crimped hair below um and then what's great is heath comes in dips his hands in the holy

01:34:27.980 water as though to wash them runs the wet hands through his hair and i was just like my boy

01:34:34.300 it's great um so he approaches shannon and she expects poetry like in the letter but heath

01:34:42.320 cannot provide that so it's a bit of a Cyrano adjacent moment in that he has set her up to

01:34:46.840 think that he can say poetical things when in fact that's not that does not come naturally to him

01:34:51.760 um he's like your beauty will be reflected in the flanks of my horse and she's like what um she's

01:35:01.440 like I demand poetry he tries it is not good and he's like how may I prove my love to you and she's

01:35:07.380 like lose every match in the tournament he's like what she's like yes a priest comes by to shush 0.94

01:35:14.040 them and shannon is like do not shush me and spare him be gone and it's a great like feminist

01:35:19.660 hashtag moment and the guy's like to his credit sorry bye um yeah oh and that's where i noticed

01:35:30.400 that her because most of the scene is filmed from like very far away in this like experimental way

01:35:35.240 but then they get closer and that's where i realized her hair was crimped on the bottom

01:35:38.560 um so anyway she's like prove that you love me by losing the tournament because it goes 0.97

01:35:44.380 against your nature and he's just like what the fuck um okay i'll bet on him with all of their 0.94

01:35:50.320 money to win yeah that was you know the stakes so chaucer chaucer paces along a railing hyping 0.99

01:36:01.680 the crowd up for heath coat is billowing in the wind sorry chaucer comma with coat

01:36:09.640 no it's it's coat comma upon chaucer

01:36:14.220 coat is billowing in the wind as chaucer is hyping up heath there we go but the subject

01:36:21.720 of the sentence is absolutely coach yes um shannon is still in the same outfit as she

01:36:27.260 was just wearing with the crimped hair green dress um and he heads out and loses on purpose

01:36:33.540 and shannon is like very turned on by this the bros are like oh no but we bet all our money on

01:36:39.740 you and he's like i have to lose because of shannon and they're all like what um so then a

01:36:46.920 song plays the song get ready which is the one that's like never met a girl who made me feel

01:36:52.560 like you do that song um montage heath loses joust after joust and shannon just getting

01:37:02.260 increasingly turned on and horny by seeing this happen she's like she's getting into joseph

01:37:07.560 fine's territory she's like grasping at a host with her arms wrapped around it just being like

01:37:12.920 yes and then christiana comes down with a message that says if he loves shannon he should win the 0.94

01:37:19.340 tournament and heath is like the fuck okay and then he gets out there and starts winning which 0.96

01:37:25.800 means that the squad won their bet against the gross french so good for them that night so 0.97

01:37:33.300 shannon comes to heath in his tent which before his tent had like a bearskin rug on the floor and 0.99

01:37:40.680 he was also on the floor and now he's in this like ornate tent with a bed with sheets and pillows

01:37:46.460 because they're rich now he's also very bruised from having lost numerous jousts in a row

01:37:52.220 shannon is wearing a long white cloak and a nightgown sort of matching set and chaucer sees 0.97

01:37:59.400 her and he's like bed him well my lady bed him well which is a fucking awful line but at the same 0.92

01:38:07.160 time like if you would film that movie today he would be like get it and you would walk away 0.99

01:38:12.800 i want to see in one of your future books allison bed him well

01:38:17.760 i will make you a solemn promise right now that you will never see that in one of my books

01:38:23.240 so she's really serving up sort of a real deanna troy from star trek situation she's got very curly 0.96

01:38:32.780 hair with the voluminous robe i was just like i think we've seen marina sirtis in exactly this

01:38:37.160 in a sexy scene on star trek next generation so she's like i hear that sometimes people call you

01:38:44.280 william and he is like yes and she's like your name doesn't matter to me as long as i can call

01:38:48.880 you my own which i really liked again this movie like swerves in ways i didn't expect because

01:38:54.720 one would think the obvious choice here is that she would find out that he's not rich and she

01:39:00.260 would feel betrayed or something but she's just like i don't care who you are like let's like 0.98

01:39:04.960 kiss right now and because shannon sawson's character is cool as fuck she's so insouciant 0.63

01:39:12.680 and just like cool and like the cool girl in your high school who just like everyone's just 0.98

01:39:17.980 like oh she's just cool like the nice one the nice cool girl was just like you would be friendly to

01:39:23.040 me but also you're so fucking cool i can't stand it yeah we never really find out like what her 0.76

01:39:27.980 title is we assume she's fancy enough ability to sit in the king seats all the time in every country 0.98

01:39:33.760 And that she's following the tournament. 1.00

01:39:36.340 Yeah.

01:39:37.720 And it's just like rich lady, number one.

01:39:42.360 I don't know. 1.00

01:39:43.240 And she's cool as fuck. 0.99

01:39:45.240 Like, this is where I was thinking, like, with her costuming as well. 0.99

01:39:47.560 Like, on another actress, I was thinking, I was like, who else is this age?

01:39:51.480 I'm like, okay, if Melissa Joan Hart had been in this movie, in these outfits, she would look like a clown.

01:39:58.840 But Shannon Sossaman is so cool.

01:40:00.700 I think I would imagine the costumer. 0.88

01:40:02.400 she beat out who eight hudson for this role oh i could see kate hudson being a cool girl as well

01:40:09.200 but not wearing these outfits no her hair would be vastly different yeah i think with shannon

01:40:14.660 sassaman the costume style team put an outfit on her and they're just like well what if we do a bit

01:40:19.040 more and they're like oh she's still pulling it off like what if we do what if we add some like

01:40:22.540 multi-colored hair extensions like oh she's still pulling it off what if we add glitter eye makeup

01:40:28.820 she's still it's like they just kept adding and she just kept pulling it off and they're like well

01:40:32.520 let's just do more and also more and she but she shannon sossaman is so cool that's why this stuff

01:40:41.720 looks cool and we'll talk about that when we get to like the costume score is gonna be i think

01:40:48.080 a positive number but how much of these how much of what shannon sossaman wears is a good costume

01:40:56.680 and how much is just shannon's awesome in is cool as fuck and it looks good on her but we'll talk 0.96

01:41:01.520 about that um okay her dress is backless which i mean i know we're like way in a different universe 1.00

01:41:08.280 from like oh historical corsetry but i feel like lana your friend would lose her mind at the she's

01:41:14.080 she's so far gone that she wouldn't even like she turned it off after queen i think yeah she

01:41:19.340 wouldn't have made it this far into the film okay so then they kissed and the insinuation is that

01:41:23.940 they fuck so um next scene the squad is on a boat heading back over to england through fog

01:41:32.520 about this boat because the way that this boat is working is it's like one old man pulling the 1.00

01:41:42.440 boat along on a single chain yeah is the implication here that he pulls them all the

01:41:47.460 way across the entire english channel this one old man that that has to be on the thames it has

01:41:54.240 to be because that's okay that's how you get up the thames but but when they go they're coming

01:41:58.480 through the water and then they go look there's england and they point like i'm going to i'm

01:42:04.520 going to pretend there's no way there was a chain that crossed the channel i was like that man must

01:42:11.200 be so tired they have to go the other direction people had to go the other direction but then

01:42:16.400 when he's there's a river thing no but is it the same slightly less old man who no it's the exact

01:42:23.160 same man same man right because he's legend has a flashback to when he was little he's

01:42:28.760 with his dad going from england to france and they were on the same boat being

01:42:33.400 chain dragged by the same old man right it's the same guy yes that's the one man who does this

01:42:42.240 that's not how you get across the channel also don't try to swim it i wasn't going to don't worry

01:42:49.100 don't do that that's very very hard so they have this sort of like conversation like how long has

01:42:54.540 it been since we were back in england for heath it's been 12 years so we see when she was dropped

01:43:00.260 off in france by his dad we see i love this young roland is there an actor playing i was hoping

01:43:06.380 there'd be young watt there was not i guess he wasn't part of the team yet and so we see how

01:43:11.120 he's got the job serving the night from the beginning and this was his father's way of

01:43:14.740 helping him achieve his dream of becoming a knight slash changing his stars and then they

01:43:20.960 arrive in london and of course the song that plays the boys are back in town boys are back in town

01:43:27.260 like could not be better yeah so they'll parade in he sees a little blonde boy standing on top

01:43:35.860 of the now empty stocks where little heath was before and he like flashes back to himself and

01:43:40.260 being like wow like i used to want to be here in the parade now i am in the parade and now maybe

01:43:44.580 i'm inspiring that boy and now for a quick advertising break the war is over and both

01:43:52.340 sides lost kingdoms were reduced to cinders and armies scattered like bones in the dust

01:43:58.640 now the survivors claw to what's left of a broken world praying the darkness chooses someone else

01:44:05.700 tonight but in the shadow dark the darkness always wins this is old school adventuring

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01:44:25.140 based on the decisions that the characters make this is what it felt like to play rpgs in the

01:44:29.740 80s and man it is so good to be back join the glass cannon podcast as we plunge into the shadow

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01:44:40.240 the podcast version dropping the next day.

01:44:43.240 See what everybody's talking about and join us in the dark.

01:44:50.420 Welcome to the realms of peril and glory.

01:44:55.660 Explore the mechanically magical vistas of Vale, the paranormal mysteries of liminal

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01:45:12.940 like Oxventure and No Rolls Barred. Search realms of peril and glory to find out more.

01:45:22.320 There are vampires out there. They're beside you in the darkness, but what people don't understand

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01:45:35.540 Those who came before me,

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01:45:54.100 The world of Sonic the Hedgehog

01:45:56.560 has been thrust into a not-so-dark, not-so-stormy, hard-boiled detective story

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01:46:06.140 Follow Sonic and the Intrepid Chaotix Detective Agency

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01:46:22.360 Which is good, because this story might be the only thing that can save their lives

01:46:29.760 Well, if that's all, I can just dispose of you

01:46:33.620 Wait, what?

01:46:38.080 All will be revealed in

01:46:40.140 Sonic the Hedgehog presents The Chaotix Case Files

01:46:44.280 Listen now, wherever you get your podcasts

01:46:47.620 and we're back and then they go somewhere i don't know um adamar is there back from war

01:46:59.120 i guess um shannon and christiana are also there and adamar reveals well heath is like look at her

01:47:04.920 she's so hot and adamar is like i'm in tux with her father to arrange to marry her oh and then

01:47:10.200 he also says like the most important things in life are like i forget he's like jousting property

01:47:16.660 my shoes women and heath is like in that order and hadamar is like yeah actually something like

01:47:24.020 that i like my shoes so this is where he reveals he's in talks with shannon's father to arrange

01:47:32.040 to marry her which is just like i do who the father is i'm in from nowhere like shannon

01:47:37.580 sussman's character not acting like someone who knows her father is going to arrange a marriage

01:47:41.640 for her like she's just like vibing out what is her father doing is letting her groupie along with

01:47:47.960 the jousters for two years right like where are her parents so the crowd is really excited about

01:47:53.980 heath they're all but they all think he's sir ulric so they're all like oh rick oh rick and

01:47:59.360 then cut to it's raining and heath is on his horse he's in a neighborhood called cheap side

01:48:04.700 um allison is the writer of historical london based books is that a place cheap side it is

01:48:11.440 it's a historically very poor part of london it's where shakespeare set all of the poor people in

01:48:17.240 taverns scenes in london so that tracks is that where the word cheap comes from or was it named

01:48:23.700 after the word cheap don't know well it just seems funny that it's like the poor part of town it's

01:48:28.660 also called cheap side it's like this is the rich side and this is the cheap side it means marketplace

01:48:34.100 thank you lena thank you so he's in cheap side oh yeah so importantly when his dad dropped him

01:48:41.380 off as a little Heath. He was like, but dad, how will I find my way home? And dad was like,

01:48:45.980 we'll just follow your feet. Like, okay. The dad is full of just proverbs. Anyway, Heath on his

01:48:52.280 horse heads down the street where his father lives or where he remembers his father lived.

01:48:56.500 He sees a little girl and he's like, do you know a man called Thatcher? And the girl's like, yes.

01:49:01.300 He looks out his window. No one knows why. And he's like, well, why is that strange? The girl

01:49:05.360 is like he's blind now and so he goes to see his now blind dad oh crucially he tells the girl he 0.83

01:49:13.000 grew up on the street so he enters his blind father's house and the father is like making a 0.77

01:49:19.580 net wait so the father's a thatcher and what is that as a job you make like you know like that

01:49:26.840 roofs yeah he fixed his roofs but now that he's blind he just like makes nets well it would be a

01:49:34.080 bad idea for him to get on roofs yeah so he he's made a pivot yeah or cut grass with a very sharp

01:49:40.700 yeah don't want to do a sharp instrument you don't want to do that conducive profession no

01:49:46.500 so heath enters and at first he's like i'm sir ulrich from licton's or from gelderland no i'm

01:49:52.560 sir ulrich lichtenstein from gelderland is that it um anyway and the dad is like oh i've heard

01:50:00.300 people talk about you you're like such a good talented knight and he's like yes and i have a

01:50:04.680 message from your son and the dad is like my son um but then the pretense goes pretty quickly away

01:50:10.760 because he's just like i followed my feet here and then they embrace and the father's like my son

01:50:15.380 and then lurking like a lurking lurker out looking just like could not look more evil

01:50:21.640 with his um metaphorical mustache adamar has witnessed this and now he knows that he is a poor

01:50:27.740 so

01:50:29.900 I mean to the movies

01:50:31.660 especially when he

01:50:32.340 he sees him jump on the roof

01:50:34.280 to fetch

01:50:34.960 re-thatch the roof

01:50:36.060 he's like

01:50:36.420 that is not a thing

01:50:37.360 a knight would do

01:50:38.220 I have

01:50:39.620 follow-up questions

01:50:40.720 for this knight on the roof

01:50:42.420 um

01:50:45.000 and then yes

01:50:46.440 the movie just like

01:50:47.100 really I appreciate that

01:50:47.880 it just cut right to

01:50:48.620 the next day

01:50:49.220 like Adam

01:50:49.900 it goes from Adam

01:50:50.900 seeing this

01:50:51.440 to the next day

01:50:51.980 Chaucer who's like

01:50:52.640 the gig is up

01:50:53.280 Adam

01:50:53.740 spilled the beans

01:50:55.760 um

01:50:57.740 like he knows that you're a poor person this means you can't joust in tournaments and then

01:51:03.420 everyone is like he you should run even shannon sossaman is there she's wearing kind of like a

01:51:08.580 princess leia inspired double buns but with like purple woven into her hair double buns look she's

01:51:14.520 even she's like heath you gotta leave everyone like literally everyone's like the scene where

01:51:18.200 she gets like the football player paint on her face except it's like literally gold and just

01:51:22.920 underneath one eye i'm not sure but she is wearing that when she runs out at the end to kiss him 0.61

01:51:27.720 so maybe she's wearing that yeah but it's a very yeah euphoria type yes yeah glitter makeup thing

01:51:36.240 but again she pulls it off because she's like what can what can she not anyway everyone literally

01:51:43.420 everyone was like you need to run away now heath and heath is like no i never run from anything

01:51:47.500 ever um and so he like goes out to joust and is immediately arrested like everyone knew he would

01:51:55.820 be like he knew he would be and he winds up in a cell with his arms tied to like a wooden

01:51:59.720 long thing a what in the star it's not the stocks it's just like the yoke yeah the oak

01:52:09.980 it's just like a thing and then his arms so he's just like yeah um so adamar comes in to visit

01:52:18.060 him in the dungeon and he's like no man can change his stars and then again he's like you have been

01:52:24.280 measured you've been found lacking and he says this while he's like punching heath who is like

01:52:29.960 attached to a yoke so it's very much just like this is the only way you can defeat him adamar

01:52:34.480 like when he's like can't use his hands and then he adds a new line that is going to be repeated

01:52:40.680 in what world could you have ever beaten me and then heath is in the stocks so this is where i

01:52:49.440 was just like I love the extras in this movie so Heath Ledger is in the stocks in the town square

01:52:55.460 and the crowd is like quote-unquote aggressive towards him they're like half-heartedly throwing

01:53:01.840 lettuce at him but they're mostly just like smiling and being like we're in a movie this is great

01:53:06.320 and then but all of the actors are pretending like this is an extremely menacing crowd

01:53:16.720 roland gets up with a stick to like defend heath the lady blacksmith is there like what is there

01:53:21.960 everyone's just like yeah we're gonna defend you heath from this crowd and the crowd is just like

01:53:25.020 we're in a movie like

01:53:26.360 it's the least menacing crowd possible but they're but the actors are all just being like oh no the

01:53:35.680 crowd i'm getting paid scale for this and then but then these three guys in monk's robes like

01:53:42.820 in disney's robin hood with the fox um the guy throws back his monk's robe and it is prince edward

01:53:51.500 the black prince and his tattoo on his face thank you for that so i knew who that was i loved this

01:53:57.720 reveal so much this was a literal monk cape billowing pull off the hood hello it is i the

01:54:03.780 black prince reveal and that's the vibes he carries through all the way through the scene

01:54:08.300 he's just like hello i have arrived to announce a proclamation there's a line later in the scene

01:54:14.160 this is my second favorite line in this entire movie my favorite one is it's called the lance

01:54:18.860 hello that was formative but here i forgot about it until i watched this last night uh the prince

01:54:24.860 goes this is my word and as such it is beyond contestation and that's how he says it i'm just

01:54:33.460 like the vibes you have to have to deliver a line of dialogue like that just he's fantastic

01:54:40.960 um yeah so he comes out and he's like i like heath you know that time he like just with me

01:54:47.700 even though i'm the prince and then he demands he no one else would joust yeah he was that meant

01:54:54.300 it meant a lot to him that he agreed to joust him so then he's like release heath and then he's like

01:55:01.440 my personal historians have discovered that heath is descended from an ancient royal family line

01:55:06.200 and then i summarized the beautiful line as and because he's the prince and he said it it has to

01:55:12.620 be true so then he knights none of them can read why would they know no exactly they don't even

01:55:20.820 know what's the writer like these people don't know but i have to say the crowd now it's sir

01:55:28.520 heath um and the crowd is like really happy about it but that's not a change from how the crowd

01:55:33.620 always is they're very accepting of him now sir heath so back to the tournament heath can compete

01:55:39.800 now because he's a knight so falcon guy adamar squire has really improved his hype man game

01:55:45.560 after seeing chaucer so often he's like he's got a nice little arc he's like doing pretty good

01:55:50.520 obviously the final jousting match is heath versus adamar so can you explain to me what

01:55:57.940 dirty trick adamar did in the first round because usually his lance is a fist on the end of it

01:56:02.880 but he did something to make a blunting instrument yeah he put uh like the fist that he put on it

01:56:10.340 was supposed to like protect the person you're dousing against from getting fully stabbed with

01:56:15.000 the lance um henry the second style he made that fist i think they said it was out of like

01:56:19.660 sugar and paint or something so it was like as soon as it hits it's going to shatter and then

01:56:24.180 you're gonna get oh okay not that they had sugar but yeah you know from all those trips to their

01:56:30.620 plantations they had to head over to Virginia which wouldn't be discovered yet by the British

01:56:37.700 exactly Colin Firth shows up yeah um no my pantaloons

01:56:42.020 there aren't even pantaloons they can't possibly have sugar okay so yeah so then because of the

01:56:50.140 dissolving fist thing so heath gets like he sharpened it underneath underneath he sharpened

01:56:55.700 it to a very serious point as well so it's not like it's not like a a vaguely pointy

01:57:03.040 wood thing it like literally had a metal shanks like edward long shanks except

01:57:09.200 it was a spear at that point yeah a very very bulky spear and heath was impaled by this

01:57:18.080 pointy thing joust joust joust but heath is like so injured from this impaling he drops his lance

01:57:26.480 like he can't hold it adamar strikes him it hits in through the joints and hits his shoulder

01:57:33.380 so he's like not doing well adamar repeats his line in what world could you beat me such a world

01:57:40.920 does not exist but then shannon shows up she hasn't been there until now with the blind dad

01:57:46.940 she's wearing a yellow dress seeing them gives heath hope the only way he can win because of the

01:57:53.340 like three points system he needs to seat adamar right if he can knock adamar off his horse he'll

01:57:59.520 get the three points and then he'll win yep he's is like i can't breathe with the armor on even

01:58:05.820 though it's made from basically vibranium so they take off the armor and then he's like i can't hold

01:58:10.840 the lance um so then they he just goes up to joust with no helmet no armor and just the lance

01:58:16.880 like tied to him which is a great in terms of cinematic stuff so then you just get heath on a

01:58:21.640 horse hair blowing in the wind you can see his face like it's a heroic moment but also like this

01:58:28.480 is questionable to go jousting with no armor on wouldn't recommend when your arm doesn't move um

01:58:36.900 anyway so as I do this Chaucer kills time because he missed doing the introduction because Heath

01:58:42.220 was like not a knight now he's a knight so he gives another speech walking back and forth on

01:58:45.840 the ledge in front of Edward the Black Prince Shannon's awesome man the blind dad and other

01:58:51.000 VIPs um and he does this using William's real name in front of his dad and his dad gets to hear

01:58:58.880 Sir William the knight and I cried and and didn't even put that in the notes even though it gets me

01:59:06.400 every time. And Watt looks at him

01:59:08.560 and goes, do you hear that?

01:59:10.320 That's your name. Your father heard that.

01:59:12.900 And I'm over here stopping on the couch

01:59:14.660 and he's like, do-do-do-do, whatever.

01:59:16.640 I don't care. I'm just like,

01:59:18.580 a joust happens.

01:59:20.180 No, this is important. 0.98

01:59:21.920 Boys talking.

01:59:23.820 The dad, I did like, I liked that the dad was always

01:59:26.620 only ever supportive.

01:59:28.440 And then, you know,

01:59:29.960 his son did change his stars.

01:59:32.320 And the father said about it.

01:59:33.040 I care about him a lot.

01:59:36.400 so and then of course maybe don't tell the dad that he isn't wearing armor that might

01:59:42.180 and he literally has the lance strapped to his side yeah sitting next to him like he's doing

01:59:49.200 great no one's worried no notes this is fine so then in sort of like a fake out so he knocks

01:59:59.400 adamar off his horse but then we find out later this is kind of a dream sequence um and he

02:00:04.780 imagines adam are coming to and looking up on the squad who say in turn you have been weighed you've

02:00:09.620 been measured and been found wanting but then that was a fantasy um but he does actually in real life

02:00:16.600 knock him off the car goes wild blind dad is crying adamar's valet alice is crying lots of

02:00:24.600 crying adamar's valet applauds even he like you have to stand and then i think yet again someone

02:00:32.420 says something what repeats one of the lines like not that you've been found wanting but like next

02:00:36.840 time i see you you'll be lying on your back or whatever and adamar is just like what what i

02:00:42.620 didn't win could i possibly lose what so shannon gold festive ribbons kind of like christmas

02:00:49.180 wrapping ribbons like literal ribbons curled in her deanna troy hair comes running out to see him 1.00

02:00:56.420 and kisses him in front of everyone also she has a euphoria glitter eyeliner on across her face

02:01:01.300 chaucer is like maybe i'll write about this um and they kiss and the camera like swirls around

02:01:09.380 them and then it goes from the background that they had to the background of like stars in the

02:01:13.440 sky like he's changed his stars and it's orion the hunter the stars that you see what's that

02:01:21.400 because he was he was pursuing her oh yeah right because she was like you're the hunter

02:01:27.280 and she was the sexy lady and then the song that plays first is you shook me all night long

02:01:34.100 but then as the credits progress it switches to we are the champions we are the champions

02:01:39.320 at the very end for that like queen a and b side situation perfection and that was the end of this

02:01:48.400 like incredibly delightful film i also think we talked for almost exactly the run time

02:01:54.720 I think this movie this movie was longer than I expected and that was because I think the

02:02:00.520 joust sequences were lengthy they were you could have shortened some jousting but I didn't come

02:02:06.180 I usually if a movie we watch is over two hours I have to make that a two-nighter I watched this

02:02:11.240 last night and just had a walk so yeah oh and can you tell people if they want to watch this movie

02:02:17.000 after having listened to us talk about it for the length of the movie where do you watch it in the

02:02:21.600 us what what service is it on it's on netflix it is on netflix it's so easy to find oh perfect

02:02:27.960 delighted yeah in canada you can watch it on the ctv app is where i found it where you watch it

02:02:35.580 with commercials but that's what it is okay lana scoring all right keep billowing i mean

02:02:46.260 defaulting to Allison I based my entire personality around a coat from this movie so I am not an

02:02:55.520 objective observer here but I do feel like between Paul Bettany and Shannon Sossaman we have to be

02:03:02.280 in the high positives like come on oh yeah the part where they were dancing to the David Bowie

02:03:07.920 song at the banquet and Shannon Sossaman's dress had like drapey sleeves and like and she's like

02:03:13.260 moving her arms around like there was billowing happening there and so that was where the priest

02:03:18.780 reveal come on like if we're if we're doing literal just cloak billowing like that's a high

02:03:25.060 score just on its own just from the cloaks slash coats slash billowing of things heath being in the

02:03:31.100 like leather chaps um paul bettany's leather bell bottoms her hair throughout the styling

02:03:39.620 throughout i think it was there were moments that were not perfect a lot of too much sometimes but

02:03:50.260 that's just me well and that's where i'm like i do agree this i think this is gonna fall on the

02:03:55.340 hypothesis for sure oh yeah but some of the stuff especially i don't think it's a 10 i will i will

02:04:00.000 let you guys tell me how many points to knock off in my heart it's a 10 but i can agree objectively

02:04:05.060 it probably is like if the code is a 10 but we can't score it just on the code 0.87

02:04:09.200 um and and and no matter what we have to mark off a point for white boys with dreads

02:04:17.440 it's a law yeah it wasn't to their credit it didn't last very long i feel like that was still

02:04:24.800 did it but do you think that was i don't know if that's an artistic choice of like now he's being

02:04:29.580 a knight so he just looks tidier or if like with shannon sauceman had the like normal wig in one

02:04:34.480 scene they just saw the dailies they're like oh no that's not good let's completely change our

02:04:37.680 entire approach to the character but not refilm that previous scene yeah so this is my question

02:04:42.980 terrible at first like they had to show how poor he was and how bad of a fit he was but they chose

02:04:49.400 white boy dreads and that was definitely a point taken off yeah so my question is i enjoyed writing

02:04:58.120 about all the outfits shannon sassaman wore in this movie shannon sassaman pulls them all off

02:05:03.020 But if you, like, remove her from the equation, are those good costumes?

02:05:07.860 I don't know.

02:05:09.460 The hat with the little mesh panel is an incredible hat, no matter who's wearing that hat.

02:05:15.880 You put the hat on me, it looks like you'd be like, look at that hat.

02:05:19.140 Great point.

02:05:19.980 Yeah.

02:05:20.260 So I'm just like, it was enjoyable to see her costumes, but I don't know that I can say they're good costumes.

02:05:26.960 Other than her, it was very adequate.

02:05:29.340 And the coat.

02:05:30.360 Sorry.

02:05:30.680 Other than her and the coat.

02:05:33.020 Are we coming out

02:05:34.640 at like a five or six?

02:05:36.120 No, I think I would go higher than that

02:05:38.400 because the thing is like, if you remove Shannon Sossaman,

02:05:40.460 the outfits are like 0.82

02:05:41.580 ridiculous. 0.64

02:05:43.780 But they are on Shannon Sossaman. 0.96

02:05:46.860 They put them on her

02:05:48.500 because they knew she could pull. I don't know.

02:05:49.940 I could go as high as an eight.

02:05:52.560 I would say a seven or an eight is fine.

02:05:55.640 I will accept either.

02:05:57.860 Should we go eight 0.82

02:05:58.560 because it's Alice's

02:06:00.640 favorite? We'll go eight.

02:06:02.440 the coat really tips it over thanks because next we have accent work okay so people who are doing

02:06:09.560 an accent would just be alan tudyke heath right because he's australian but he's a small accent

02:06:16.580 yeah shannon sussman american who's not really doing sussman has heard shannon sussman is doing

02:06:24.260 a lacroix accent where she's heard of accents before there's a british person in the next room

02:06:30.480 and she's heard it through the wall and frankly like that's all she needed to do so but had

02:06:37.520 accents briefly explained to her yeah it's not i don't think this category is necessarily like

02:06:41.720 are the people in it good at doing accents but it's like are the accents notable but in other

02:06:47.080 movies we've included the soundtrack in accent work the soundtrack gives it points the accents

02:06:53.760 are like adequate like it's not good it's not bad it's not it's not they're not doing anything

02:06:59.160 interesting with it but they get bonus points for the but what about the scottish woman's accent

02:07:03.620 but that's just her that's that is a watered down glass region yeah and and i like that is 1.00

02:07:11.160 that own accent again that's her own accent watered down not even going full force like

02:07:17.960 glass region okay but if we're going with like if we're just looking at the music

02:07:22.240 is that i'm going five like give it a five just for the music yeah

02:07:29.760 i think five is fair overall i'll allow that the music plus like the accents are just kind of there

02:07:37.380 yeah yeah it's already it's it's already going to be the highest scoring we know this that's why i'm

02:07:43.420 accepting these and i'm not fighting like the next category is 10 and we don't even need to

02:07:47.540 have a conversation about it historical audacity it is the it is the definition of historical

02:07:57.180 audacity it is that's what we came here metric by which we created the category yeah it takes

02:08:03.760 a history and then changes it but in fun and good ways there are about six facts in this movie

02:08:10.660 and the rest of it is a great time the people exist the places exist and they know what they're

02:08:16.800 doing with it and they know why they're doing it with it yeah they're not just doing it randomly

02:08:21.700 yeah they've made choices well even the fact that all the way through but the fact that like

02:08:27.700 edward the black prince did go in disguise to tournaments like i'm shocked that that's a real

02:08:32.120 fact but that's like that's one of the facts and they built a whole thing out of that we did send

02:08:37.920 him to the hundred years war for like one scene they built plot around it like i know fact and

02:08:43.660 they built plot around it and they did it well because history doesn't have plot history has

02:08:49.860 and then stories well and this is like if you compare it to for instance shakespeare and love

02:08:55.780 where it's like the audacity of that wasn't of con first having a plantation in virginia like

02:09:02.360 that's not like let's do this for fun like let's take a fact and spin it that was just someone

02:09:06.940 not doing their homework or just thinking no one would notice or care this is someone who like

02:09:11.840 like the three of us like history nerds enjoy this movie knowing it's inaccurate because of

02:09:17.400 the audacity because it's just the fun of it and having now lived through a pandemic i wouldn't

02:09:22.940 want to write that either no that's no fun if you were writing a black plague movie it's going

02:09:28.440 to be a black plague movie you can't have a fun black plague movie i'm saying that as a challenge

02:09:33.300 to the filmmakers in the world if you want to write well monty python okay yeah valid yeah

02:09:40.960 that is formative lana movie i would watch that one for this podcast i've never seen that maybe

02:09:48.200 later but i would i would watch that wait wait you've never seen holy grail no oh okay i'm

02:09:56.020 putting it on the list i'll say okay we'll say if you've never seen it and you're gonna have

02:10:00.120 such a bad time when lana and i have to talk about it you're not gonna enjoy yourself this

02:10:04.500 once fit my sister the thing about to write the outline that we have to talk to and that is going

02:10:12.760 to make it that that might also be something to do for charity that might be that might be

02:10:18.920 but in terms of your surprise i mean not having seen that my like aversion to watching movies

02:10:24.900 with men in it goes like deep i get that yeah and that is a very fair one but we literally

02:10:31.300 watched that in my high school biology class biology class oh is that is that what every

02:10:36.860 class yeah no no that's that's not that we convinced my ap bio teacher to let us watch

02:10:44.180 it for finals because in ap bio you don't take finals or at least you didn't in the 90s you

02:10:50.920 you took the ap class and then there was a month of school where you did nothing but goof off and

02:10:55.580 do egg drops and whatever and we watched this in my ap english class for the same reason so yeah

02:11:00.820 i just didn't have a teacher who is into that clearly she didn't know what she was agreeing to

02:11:08.760 if this is a school-based movie it is not different in canada okay it is not it is not

02:11:15.240 appropriate for school it is not appropriate for high schoolers and yet and yet yeah nowadays

02:11:21.400 there would be letters someone would be fired but it was the 90s okay so are you guys yann are you

02:11:29.940 on board with i'm on board for a 10 and is the next category vibes yes the last category is five

02:11:35.020 because i think that's also i think that's a 10 yeah i mean i i don't think i can i don't think

02:11:40.460 i have anything to bring it down no no like even just like some of the details we pulled out like

02:11:46.080 the vibes of the movie are just like good vibes but the fact that like every time a horse falls

02:11:49.600 on screen you see the horse get back up the fact that the crowd and every mob is just vibing yeah

02:11:56.480 like the angry mob quote unquote like every time the crowd is there they're just like we're in a

02:12:00.340 movie this is great like the only like sort of like and i don't mean negative like bad in the

02:12:07.940 movie i just mean the only like negative vibes in the movie is adamar but he's so over the top

02:12:11.980 villainous like you know he's not gonna win so you're never like worried about him you're just

02:12:17.300 having fun all the way through like there's never a moment where you're like oh i'm i'm upset that

02:12:22.360 i'm watching a massacre with 11 000 naked dead bodies in the hallway for instance

02:12:28.100 that's a different kind of vibes just take his head there were there's a lot of less limbs a lot

02:12:36.100 of new less nude limbs in this all limbs were firmly attached to bodies all the way through

02:12:42.000 this and those bodies were wearing there were no sewers clean or dirty only good vibes yeah

02:12:48.680 all of the songs were good and did not hurt me the songs all had tunes and were sung by people

02:12:56.040 with singers singing them not just random actors live on set good vibes even the chanted songs

02:13:05.040 that this that that they'd made up themselves had rhythm even the one that he's just singing

02:13:11.040 to himself on his little horse i was okay okay so with a score of 33

02:13:21.120 feeding newsies by eight and a half points our new winner is a knight's tale as expected

02:13:30.720 what a treat delighted my next pick will not be this delightful i have a feeling i'm gonna

02:13:38.520 it's hard my usual ways it's hard it's hard to beat this yeah yeah it really i don't know like

02:13:47.180 there's some things that i'm thinking of some of them are movies i have not seen but they're about

02:13:51.360 historical people i'm interested in some of them are movies i have seen but now knowing how queen

02:13:55.820 margot went i'm questioning you're allowed to traumatize us here's the thing okay you have to

02:14:04.360 do it the way that i did it which is if you recommend a film that traumatizes the group

02:14:08.220 you have to recommend a nice one for your next pick and then you can traumatize again after you

02:14:12.540 just have to alter okay i know what to suggest for your next pick what princess caribou princess

02:14:20.880 caribou i want to hold off until i have done that on the podcast okay good point slash i would i

02:14:27.800 will have allison on the episode of princess i knew as soon as you said that i was like oh yeah

02:14:32.160 the dirt bag okay we'll find something it'll be great familiar no i will i will i will find

02:14:40.940 something good but like next time it's lana's pick and it's tombstone right yes we're gonna

02:14:46.120 watch okay so ann made us watch a for a film that was very much her heart and then allison

02:14:53.940 made us watch a film that was very much her heart so we're going back to my teenage dirtbag years

02:14:59.680 and we're watching tombstone with val kilmer and um oh crap his name just went kurt russell

02:15:10.300 as wyatt earp and sam elliott as virgil earp and bill paxton as morgan earp and it's it has it has

02:15:19.900 so many people i can't wait till you see all of the random people in it is there is there a single

02:15:26.140 female character in it yes yes dana delaney is in it okay um josephine there's there is ali erp

02:15:35.540 um there's erp wives there's the three erp wives there's what and they are very they're very um

02:15:41.500 different and they have characters is one of them like an oldie time saloon madame that's that's

02:15:48.860 dana delaney's character okay good because in these films i always hope for that sort of character

02:15:53.840 yeah she's doc holiday's love interest that's all you care about is doc holiday and everything

02:15:57.940 around doc holiday so it'll be great no i'm excited to come into this because i don't know

02:16:02.360 a single thing about any of the names that you just said of the okay historical western people

02:16:06.980 i'm just like oh why are you about kilmer no i don't no oh gracious oh you're about to be learned

02:16:14.520 these are all just words to me so i'm coming in with no you know kurt russell right i know the

02:16:20.240 name kurt russell i couldn't tell you what movie kurt russell has been in um he was let me find

02:16:27.080 the the ultimate kurt russell movie um he's in a long-term relationship with goldie hahn

02:16:33.840 yes kurt russell which both which speaks well of him as a person it does he's in the same

02:16:41.860 escape from new york these are like early 80s action movies he was not a genre i'm into

02:16:50.140 he was in so many things but he was in a he was a child actor he was in like disney child actor

02:16:56.960 70s yeah i'm like the yeah all the way back to the 60s like i want to say he's been in like

02:17:03.080 old yeller or something like that yeah he was i'm trying to find it because it was like

02:17:08.300 there's a movie and you look at it's like oh my goodness that's kurt russell as a baby

02:17:14.240 but like the just the american wild west of it all like i am also coming in with

02:17:20.220 nothing yeah i'm just like i know lola montez was there but i assume she's not going to be

02:17:25.660 in this movie so if she is i'm never gonna stop enjoying myself as the greatest

02:17:30.580 no there's no lola montez i'm sorry yeah yes

02:17:34.700 i can't i i am i am surprised that i'm introducing you to both val kilmer and

02:17:41.520 kurt russell but sam elliot i do know sam elliot i know sam elliot who has a face for westerns

02:17:49.300 like i does and he has a voice for for westerns as well he has like the most chocolate and this

02:17:54.540 is gonna be well no okay so newsies i guess newsies was their first america set yeah yeah

02:18:00.960 this is this is possibly more recent let me let me double check well and this is also all

02:18:07.640 american actors playing american people because in newsies it was christian bill a british person

02:18:13.360 but they're playing western people so there's going to be an accent there's going to be oh yes

02:18:19.360 discounting especially in valetilmer i'm your huckleberry yeah this is

02:18:26.020 older than newsies this is this is earlier than newsies so i'm i'm at least going back in time

02:18:34.420 and i will eventually make us watch um some chinese movies i would love to i would love to

02:18:41.380 get on this podcast series into some sort of like k-drama chinese oh the last emperor that's one that

02:18:47.780 you've talked about the last emperor was yeah um yeah maybe let me see maybe raise the red lantern

02:18:55.480 we'll see i i mean i i have i will take us outside of europe and i will take us outside of of the

02:19:02.500 early modern medieval era i am i am here to do that i am not i like what i like i know that

02:19:11.060 i will i will make us watch a bongli movie at some point and it'll be entirely in chinese

02:19:18.780 and it'll be wonderful but but to match the theme of the last three movies yeah which has all been

02:19:25.860 the movie of our teenage dirtbag hearts yeah i've watched this movie probably as many times as as

02:19:32.140 as you did um on vhs over and over until the tape wore out i'm very excited this will be good okay

02:19:43.440 well since our recording is now i think officially longer than the movie itself that's our that's our

02:19:51.420 regular time to end i guess um thank you so much thank you for another was this the first year i

02:19:58.780 don't know thank you for a year of fabulous discussions and like showing me movies i have

02:20:05.340 not seen before and this has been so much fun thank you to the tits out brigade for like not

02:20:12.540 running us off of the patreon platform for turning out three hour long episodes in which we recap

02:20:18.800 beat by beat films that we like or don't like as the case may be we appreciate you

02:20:25.440 various films yeah and if the tits of brigade has suggestions of movies that they think we

02:20:29.960 might want to try they can leave those in the comments too oh yes please yes if they have

02:20:34.300 thoughts i was excited when after we did the newsies like people were like talk like people

02:20:39.180 the tits of brigade is into spot conlin and i was i was happy to see like oh you know they have 0.93

02:20:43.720 good taste yeah yeah they're all kindred spirits they all are so thank you so much thank you tits

02:20:51.140 So Brigade, Patreons, and we will have another one of these episodes in the new year, I assume.

02:21:02.360 So if you want to hear more episodes of Vulgar Peace Theater, the way that you can do that is

02:21:07.460 by joining my Patreon, which is patreon.com slash Anne Foster Writer, and you become a member at

02:21:13.680 the $5 or more a month level. So basically you pay $5 a month and you can listen to all the

02:21:18.600 episodes of vulgar peace theater of which there are lots i don't i haven't counted i feel like

02:21:23.100 there's at least 20 i don't know so if you want to just like really just dissociate and listen to me

02:21:27.660 allison and lana talk and i mean this was a delightful episode where we all really love

02:21:31.160 the movie sometimes some of us don't love the movie and those episodes are fun in a different

02:21:36.100 way as well um if you also want to like you know do what you want to do but like you can also get

02:21:41.680 a free trial on patreon where you can just like for a month just listen to everything you want to

02:21:47.080 after the month, just like don't renew. And that's fine. And I respect that. And that's a valid

02:21:51.400 choice. Anyway, yeah, this, this was a special bonus episode. So I will just let you know that

02:21:56.840 you can follow me on various social media, Instagram and threads and blue sky at vulgar

02:22:02.980 history pod. If you want to get in touch with me, you can go to vulgarhistory.com and there's a

02:22:07.900 little contact me button there. And otherwise, I mean, I'm here, I'm here for you. I'm your

02:22:14.400 Emotional Support Canadian. We're going to be back with a new episode next week. Next week is going

02:22:21.140 to be a re-release of a classic episode that I think is well worth revisiting. And that's all

02:22:28.820 I'll say about that. But until next time, my friends, keep your pants on, keep your tits out 1.00

02:22:33.740 and happy holidays. Happy New Year. 0.99

02:22:38.520 Vulgar History is researched, written and hosted by Anne Foster. That's me. The editor is

02:22:44.160 Christina Lumagi. Theme music is by the Severn Duo. The Vulgar History Show image is by Debra Wong.

02:22:51.320 Transcripts are written by Aveline Malek. Find transcripts of recent episodes at vulgarhistory.com.

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Vulgar History - December 25, 2024

Movie Discussion： A Knight's Tale (2001)

Episode Stats

Transcript