Poog with Kate Berlant and Jacqueline Novak - A Tower of Profiterole

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00:02:35.440 Hi, I'm Kate Berlant.

00:02:36.900 I'm Jacqueline Novak.

00:02:38.020 And this is POOG,

00:02:39.160 an ongoing conversation about wellness

00:02:41.060 between two obsessive friends.

00:02:42.740 Two untamable intellects.

00:02:44.520 This is our hobby. 0.97

00:02:45.360 This is our hell.

00:02:46.220 This is our naked desire for free products.

00:02:48.500 This is POOG.

00:02:49.920 Today's topic, loosely speaking,

00:02:51.380 a bumper sticker.

00:02:53.020 A coaster, a title.

00:02:59.140 Hello.

00:03:00.480 Hi.

00:03:06.520 When you sigh like that, do you get a response from others?

00:03:11.980 Like, what's wrong or anything like that?

00:03:17.920 I mean, obviously I'm asking because I do.

00:03:20.820 yeah I'm trying to think of the last side like that I've got plenty wrong but right I always

00:03:28.960 feel like no that's the first time I breathed in five minutes you should be applauding me

00:03:33.700 I was suffering in the five minutes before the sigh yeah I don't know if I'm a big sire

00:03:39.120 um good morning uh good morning it's good we haven't done poog in a couple weeks which is

00:03:47.660 funny. We last spoke the day after Thanksgiving, I believe. I mean, you and I, of course, have

00:03:53.580 spoken offline, but. Tons. Tons. Tons. I felt bad for the listeners at times. Yeah. You know,

00:04:01.080 almost like, God, they'd love this. Yeah, I know. They'd eat this up. It's really interesting when

00:04:09.800 you're crying like crying where did the tears come from well that's the question and how do they never

00:04:18.060 end well i told you the other day drink water right oh yeah you said that i mean that's water

00:04:26.620 so you're losing water you're crying all day crazy yeah you gotta be it's literal i did yesterday

00:04:33.260 drink a big LMNT, element electrolyte drink, which by the way, where are they? We need the

00:04:40.240 powder. Okay. So, but I did drink some electrolytes for that reason. I had electrolytes

00:04:46.380 yesterday. They were Vega, you know, Vega. And I read Vega's book years ago. That's not his name,

00:04:53.020 But, you know, and I was really taken with it about energy and the electrolytes.

00:05:02.060 It said I decided to pour some to actually it said mid workout.

00:05:06.080 And I was like, let's try it during my Tracy.

00:05:08.780 And it said, pour into ice cold water.

00:05:12.900 Now, what does that mean to you?

00:05:14.520 What and why do you think that's essential?

00:05:16.540 Why are they saying that?

00:05:17.400 And they were saying that in the instructions.

00:05:19.660 I have no idea.

00:05:20.640 And that's very, you know, anti Ayurveda.

00:05:23.020 yeah i don't understand why you'd want it to be cold the only thing i could think was that

00:05:29.440 they don't want the salts or whatever to dissolve like what i'm confused by that we'll look into

00:05:37.140 that okay so element meaning that we never will but yeah let's reach out to them i'm gonna say

00:05:42.740 oh but i had a moment that i wanted to um i think i texted you about but i don't know but i was

00:05:48.120 it's interesting when you're driving and crying because it you're like anyway I was driving and

00:05:54.360 crying and I saw this bumper and I pulled and in front of me was his car and the bumper sticker

00:05:59.640 said take a deep breath comma you've got this baby and to my horror I looked at it I took a deep breath

00:06:08.460 and I exhaled and I was like like I actually did it and you were healed by a bumper sticker to my

00:06:18.360 horror what you yeah okay no it's like when you were healed by Matthew McConaughey he hey oh yeah

00:06:26.400 You know, one must not be too good for being healed by a bumper sticker, a coaster, a button, or a gif.

00:06:47.100 Or a celebrity's book. Totally.

00:06:49.700 You know, I've been healed by a title. I mean, that's a little, ever healed by a title of a book? Don't need to read it?

00:06:55.700 oh what was the title fear and do it anyway but my mom used to say that to me when I was little

00:07:03.220 it's so sweet and it made you the woman you are today and it made me the woman that's I will I've

00:07:10.220 also been I think what I'm I'm oh I almost forgot about this so I'm going to New York in a few days

00:07:16.480 I'm gonna be doing my show I also want to I'm sorry forgive me Jacqueline but I want to plug 1.00

00:07:20.440 a poog this is for the poog hags this is a discount code for christmas eve and new year's 1.00

00:07:25.840 eve shows yes mac kate m-a-c-k-a-t-e is going to get you 25 off those holiday shows again that's

00:07:35.460 m-a-c-k-a-t-e all caps 25 is a really generous 25 off just those just the holiday shows but

00:07:42.420 got a two o'clock and a 6 p.m okay anyway after this run anyway this this little gift that i'm

00:07:48.400 going to give myself is I want to finally go to Esalen in Big Sur. Oh shit. You're invited. 0.99

00:07:53.480 I immediately went from solo retreat to you also being there, but I want to do it. It's,

00:07:59.220 it's ashram time. You know, I want, like, I just want, not that it's an ashram, but right.

00:08:04.860 But I think I, are you at all intrigued by a silent meditation or like by, by a silent retreat?

00:08:12.200 Literally couldn't be more. I've been waiting.

00:08:16.520 us at a silent retreat like it's because well imagine the eye contact oh yeah well because

00:08:23.980 the silent retreat this is where I struggle no writing I believe some of them that's where I

00:08:28.420 struggle too well that depends I think I would have to be able to write and read

00:08:32.460 well let me ask you this are they all like that are you are they all no no to write no that that

00:08:42.120 was almost a thought that wasn't related to the esalen thing i uh i just was because i have i've

00:08:47.900 had friends that have gone on silent retreats and you know they're like yeah day four is really

00:08:51.660 challenging i'm like yeah i can't do that i don't know if that's is that what i really need is that

00:08:56.320 the medicine i really need yeah but we'll see we'll see um i could do the silence with the others

00:09:03.240 yeah you just nod okay you and me are both addicted to thinking right yeah to figuring it

00:09:09.560 out and the belief of following the thought through and that and that it can be figured out

00:09:15.220 and I can find peace right and that it's a sickness yeah we were talking about because I

00:09:21.520 was saying to you the other day about my spiritual dollar signs in the eyes like a cartoon character

00:09:25.200 you said you said this and I want you to say it for the listeners because it was so brilliant to

00:09:29.460 me thank you and and we're similar and this is where we're it's like when you have a friend that

00:09:36.640 you share a particular kind of compulsion with like it's kind of incredible right and you know

00:09:44.500 dangerous like I don't know I don't know I actually think no I think I think it's good I

00:09:48.660 think because when the other one's in the throes of it the second figure can be the witness and

00:09:53.940 you know we can you can play the role of witness but like I think you and me use our our minds

00:09:59.800 right and we go we can figure this out we can find a way through this we figure out a way to

00:10:02.900 think about this is big for me I'm gonna figure out a way to think about this and I'm going what

00:10:06.720 what is this compulsion about it's about no pain it's about I could figure out a way to think about

00:10:10.280 this all experience no pain so I won't have to have the bad feeling yeah and it's like it's like

00:10:14.960 you don't even remember anymore the possibility that having the feeling is survivable yeah like

00:10:23.200 and I'm still not convinced it is and so it's it's like a cartoon character with dollar signs

00:10:29.660 into the eyes. It's like, wait, I got an idea. I can have it all. Yeah. Yeah. Or even it becomes

00:10:36.420 a mushrooms the whole time thing of like, oh my God. Yeah. The avoiding pain, you know, we all do

00:10:41.220 it, but there's also a clarity that comes with like the rawness of just pain that actually clarity

00:10:50.060 is not the word, just the to be refined by the fires of suffering as James Hollis would say.

00:10:56.820 but speaking of young of course well i always think you know can't i get around it i mean that's

00:11:03.940 i know and yeah yeah yeah i know i know i know young i know yeah yeah yeah yeah i know and then

00:11:09.560 like it's like a sneak like i'm gonna sneak i'm gonna sneak around the pain yeah yeah nope but

00:11:16.460 wait what were you there was something oh the silent retreat i think the harder part would be

00:11:21.860 to me losing thoughts like to not be able to journal silent fine if I was able to journal

00:11:29.800 then conversation with myself all day fine great but the no journal being unallowed to

00:11:38.600 capture thoughts terrifies me and therein lies the ultimate medicine probably well for sure

00:11:45.300 oh god well i mean i've been on my own retreat in the sense that uh i'm clocking in now at over a

00:11:53.660 month of essentially no social media at all and i just want to say no i never so this is the hell

00:12:01.560 of the times right is when you talk about like i'm trying to be on my phone like it's like

00:12:04.980 it's instantly it feels embarrassing and like yes we all know like we're all you know the phones are

00:12:10.980 bad and i know i've talked about this and it makes me sick or it just makes me self-conscious

00:12:14.560 instantly but I am clocking in over a month in a different way and I think I might actually never

00:12:18.720 go back this time and when I say never go back I'm still gonna have social media accounts you

00:12:22.360 know I logged on to post something I had to post but I got out and I actually think I used to still

00:12:29.860 have the anxiety of missing things on there you know a couple of those social interactions that

00:12:36.280 you know you meet someone on there that you like their work and the next thing you know you're at

00:12:39.940 dinner and it's a lifelong friend, you know, something like that. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm over

00:12:44.540 that now. And I'm like, oh, I'm actually willing to sacrifice whatever could have been on there.

00:12:49.700 Yes. Well, it's like this thing that my mother would say to me, and I'm pretty sure my aunt

00:12:54.580 would also say to my cousin. And therefore, I think it came from the grandmother. But it was

00:13:00.980 just like any time there was a thing that you might be going to and then like deciding you

00:13:04.620 weren't going to be going to it. It was like, but your husband could be there.

00:13:09.940 You could meet your husband there.

00:13:13.460 Okay.

00:13:14.040 And then, you know, in terror, in terror, you run off to the, to the, whatever, the potluck.

00:13:20.220 Yeah.

00:13:24.160 That's really funny.

00:13:25.600 And you can hear me even, I'm being unarticulate and kind of fumbling here because I do feel

00:13:30.040 exhausted with my own pontification on this matter over the poog years. 0.96

00:13:35.180 But I swear to God, it's different this time. 0.99

00:13:37.400 And I think, I think I'm just, because honestly, and I'll say it, something that used to bum 1.00

00:13:42.080 me out was I miss reading the poog, going into the poog DMs and hags send beautiful 1.00

00:13:48.120 messages and it's encouraging or it's nice to check in with, but I ultimately can't still 1.00

00:13:53.760 send them, but I ultimately just can't erase myself every day through interacting with

00:14:00.520 Instagram.

00:14:02.580 Yeah.

00:14:03.620 Um, and talk about avoiding pain.

00:14:05.320 Talk about avoiding pain. 0.99

00:14:06.260 the the phone stuff is uh might as well be a bottle of gin 100 well or a fucking syringe 0.99

00:14:13.080 filled with heroin it's like actually it's um she started with syringe full of heroin which 0.94

00:14:20.660 is like what i should have heard and i heard syringe full of hair and i was like vile i was

00:14:26.320 like yeah that sounds horrible um well i have these fantasies of of clearing my phone of

00:14:33.360 everything but healing apps, okay? And nutrients. So I open it up and it's like, because I do this

00:14:42.680 sometimes, I open up the phone and I go, wait, what's the good stuff on here? I'm like, okay,

00:14:49.600 books, right? And I open the books app. It's like, what if my phone wasn't just a literal black hole

00:14:56.900 right yeah that I carry with me to siphon my own energy out of myself yeah exactly yeah I keep this

00:15:04.660 with me because I can't hold my entire soul's energy in my body because I'm too afraid of the

00:15:11.200 light I carry so I keep this just to sort of be able to piss in a bag spiritually yeah no more

00:15:21.340 it's an emergency um had an interesting dinner with you at jar lovely dinner with you at jar

00:15:27.560 oh yeah let's talk about that so to my excitement instead of jack i'm gonna be in your area

00:15:33.480 let's go to jar got the reservation so okay here's a detail i didn't tell you the reservation

00:15:40.000 was early it was i think six o'clock around 5 30 i got a call from jar i saw my phone lighting up

00:15:45.480 at jar and i answered and they go hi we just wanted to confirm your reservation very unusual

00:15:49.400 to confirm a reservation

00:15:50.440 half an hour before.

00:15:51.760 Do you know what I mean?

00:15:52.480 Like us.

00:15:53.020 So in my mind,

00:15:53.880 they want to make sure we're coming

00:15:55.720 so they can get the cake ready

00:15:57.660 or whatever.

00:15:58.300 Like in my mind,

00:15:59.000 I was like,

00:16:01.560 they want to make sure

00:16:02.300 we're really coming

00:16:03.100 before they get the

00:16:04.380 champagne tower together.

00:16:07.340 I picked Jacqueline up.

00:16:09.760 We get to jar.

00:16:12.080 Wait.

00:16:12.520 We check.

00:16:13.720 More.

00:16:14.940 Huh?

00:16:15.200 Pick me up.

00:16:15.600 I'm in a blue blazer.

00:16:16.940 You look amazing.

00:16:17.900 Yeah.

00:16:18.040 and a special brooch

00:16:20.440 yeah you look really polished

00:16:22.120 I'm not polished

00:16:23.520 but I'm kind of accepting that and loving that

00:16:26.520 and then we arrived there

00:16:28.320 I searched

00:16:29.840 the host's eyes

00:16:31.760 wait I'm slowing us down

00:16:33.080 so I want to get more of a setup

00:16:35.600 I said to Chris I gotta shower

00:16:38.100 and I gotta wear something good

00:16:40.060 for quote

00:16:41.620 our big night at JAR

00:16:43.200 I go

00:16:44.740 they know we're coming

00:16:46.660 i mean i

00:16:49.100 okay you you have texted you know with the chef had a lovely interaction all of that

00:16:57.140 yeah i was like jack and i are coming she god bless her was out of town i was like okay well

00:17:02.780 she knows that we're coming i was like they the bell has been rung at jar headquarters

00:17:07.880 and we're coming in so you pick me up my greatest feelings i love getting into your car

00:17:15.420 I gave you a gift

00:17:16.860 we can get to that later

00:17:18.360 oh yes you sure did

00:17:20.440 but then we

00:17:22.220 get there check in

00:17:24.820 I search the host's eyes

00:17:26.960 upon check in

00:17:28.340 for something and then because

00:17:30.980 the reservation whatever we get to our

00:17:33.180 table

00:17:33.560 so

00:17:35.720 I will say this

00:17:38.180 I wasn't really expecting

00:17:41.100 anything

00:17:41.600 I mean in one sense

00:17:44.100 okay speak for your smell yeah no you know what it was i was almost more convinced that like

00:17:49.660 like it was gonna be full of uh of hags okay oh well that's what was funny is that jack and i we

00:17:55.560 haven't been to jar together in a long time and so every table of like youngish women like anyone

00:18:01.960 that like i looked at them being like well they're here because of pook and even i had a couple trips 0.81

00:18:07.920 to the bathroom where i felt i was like hello like i was almost searching the faces of some

00:18:14.160 of the patrons like my eyes were roving at the bar i was like oh yeah i was like oh i feel like

00:18:20.260 i feel like i better turn my head for the natural right because the natural human response of if

00:18:26.100 someone walks by you you just look at them right so i took the natural human response of anyone

00:18:30.140 looking at me as i you know whooshed past them as a kind of a silent poog kind of a silent

00:18:36.880 understanding that we're all here. Okay. On the way to the bathroom, I go, I think I wished a

00:18:42.760 little too fast. Try to slow it down on the return to give him a chance to confirm that in fact it

00:18:48.220 was Poog. It was. It was. It was me. I go, well, Kate's the, you know, because we joke about I've 1.00

00:18:55.160 never been recognized for Poog. Okay. It's not entirely true. Well, by the way, I'll just say 1.00

00:18:59.300 the other day someone was like, oh, I wasn't sure if you were Jacqueline or Kate. That's so funny.

00:19:04.860 They're like, I thought it was Jacqueline, but it's you.

00:19:07.480 That's so great.

00:19:09.080 Okay.

00:19:09.320 When the second they heard their voice, I mean, your voice.

00:19:11.960 I don't know.

00:19:12.340 They just, they came up and they're like, oh, I thought maybe it was Jacqueline.

00:19:15.060 Okay, wait.

00:19:16.280 So keep going.

00:19:17.780 I love that we're slowing it down.

00:19:19.560 Well, I always want to slow it down. 1.00

00:19:21.780 So I think I was so, I'd forgotten kind of the poog element. 1.00

00:19:26.600 Okay. 1.00

00:19:27.020 Because I was so excited to be in your company and excited for dinner and whatever that it

00:19:30.640 act.

00:19:30.920 That's kind of what, that's why I was like, because I didn't feel this intense.

00:19:34.400 Like I wasn't already scanning for whatever.

00:19:36.800 I was really kind of bubbling over with excitement.

00:19:40.980 So I kept forgetting, but you kept remembering.

00:19:44.860 That we have a podcast called Poo, where we talk about jar.

00:19:47.580 Is that what you mean?

00:19:49.100 Yes.

00:19:49.520 Like, so, I mean, wondering whether everyone's in on the joke or no one's in on the joke

00:19:55.800 is one of the strangest places to live.

00:20:00.980 The joke being our presence.

00:20:02.200 like the joke being like we all know uh us and this restaurant is a thing right yeah so like when

00:20:10.780 i i felt like i was performing a little bit for the waiter like oh yeah something oh well i said

00:20:17.440 something actually i can't believe i said this was so embarrassing so really this is actually

00:20:21.940 really dick let's say so we're there this this server who i who we have not had before is talking

00:20:27.860 about the specials or a couple of specials things we go we've had that you know a couple little 0.71

00:20:33.720 yeah add-ons to the menu well we know that and then i even did a whole thing of on the menu i

00:20:38.320 was like oh well there's actually huge news and this does need to hear this actually has to go

00:20:42.820 straight to jar corporate a hag didn't form and it is in fact true the lychee teeny is gone off

00:20:47.840 the menu i repeat the lychee teeny is off the menu so i came in with that information noticed

00:20:52.280 its absence on the cocktail menu was devastated he was like yeah no it's gone like maybe it'll be

00:20:57.480 back but like it's off the menu and then i'm looking at the main menu and there's a burger

00:21:01.780 on there and i go have i lost my mind or is there never is there always a burger on the menu i've

00:21:06.500 never seen that and he was like oh yeah that like can come on and off and i went something something

00:21:11.360 oh and then i said we know the chef i may have even said suzanne you did i think i said we know

00:21:18.980 suzanne to be clear who is the chef i was like well i know suzanne okay again never matter just

00:21:25.640 some text, some lovely text exchange. I threw that in his face on face. And I go, okay, this

00:21:30.700 is nothing. And so in my mind also, I'm like, he is so starstruck. He can't even imagine that it's

00:21:40.860 us. So we take a long time with the menu. We put it in an order. You know, the meal was gorgeous.

00:21:46.280 Of course, the food was great. We're having more. Wait, what? What did I forget? Okay. So

00:21:53.040 So one, first of all, you doing this, this sort of performance of one, the lychee martini is gone.

00:22:05.040 Why? And asking why? And him saying, sometimes we change it up. Okay. Yeah. I actually had a

00:22:11.800 moment. This was my derangement where I thought, did they take it off because they want to be a

00:22:18.120 step ahead like we've talked about the lychee martini so much that now it's like half for them

00:22:24.280 to have it no not flying off the shelves like almost like okay now that that's like a thing

00:22:29.340 and everyone's asking for it we have to we have to abandon it you can't just play the hits that's

00:22:34.000 so funny because i just had the fantasy forward i just had the fantasy of the lychee teeny they

00:22:39.040 had to take off because everyone was listening to poop coming and ordering it and they were like we

00:22:43.040 can't the supply chain is of course as we know been fractured and they can't keep up the supply

00:22:49.180 and only the demand yet again next next the burger thing was fascinating to me because

00:22:55.060 it was like I don't know were you offended by its presence like like this is no I was excited I was

00:23:00.640 shocked because okay cheeseburger is one of my favorite foods and so the thought because when

00:23:05.500 I go to jar I get a steak but it's like I just couldn't imagine that I had ever my eyes had ever

00:23:09.900 seen burger on that menu. Like, how could I have forgotten? I did get the pot roast on this night

00:23:14.860 and it was delicious, but continue. Which we both got last time. It was delicious. So I had a moment

00:23:20.720 now that this is like pristine. So we had loved the tomato onion salad, the heirlooms last time

00:23:28.200 we were there, of course. Tomato is my favorite, one of my favorite things in the world. Take it

00:23:33.380 in any form this is like primo you to me okay so I'm like but but I'm thinking about the tomato

00:23:42.120 salad and and you're like oh I just I'm always shocked to see a tomato salad on a menu in

00:23:49.200 November I mean when tomatoes are out of season yeah right right and I'm humiliated okay obviously

00:23:56.840 because I'm tomato all year whether it's red as a cherry or white as a web browser okay

00:24:06.500 never forgot when Kate identified a tomato as what white is web browser okay it holds

00:24:15.220 imagine that in a food review how cruel so so I'm like I'm arguing but can I just what I mean

00:24:26.700 interjecting with because I described again to insult the chef at that restaurant in Scotland

00:24:31.160 I described the tomato as being white as a web browser and then I was reading a really a vicious

00:24:37.220 takedown of a play in the New York Times yeah and this person was crucifying this one production

00:24:43.640 in a way that I was like really but it was like you know of course like certain things like this

00:24:49.000 actor is amazing whatever but like crucifying the production design and everything and they go

00:24:55.180 something something the lighting design by full name no would make a rat clap

00:25:01.640 okay see this is this is the problem and i was like that's journalism i mean that is you're

00:25:11.680 hysterical okay that is the funny maybe laugh out loud and i and i screen grabbed it i was like that

00:25:16.820 is so that's like the anger in that which i almost thought it's what is that is that like a theater

00:25:22.700 phrase that i've never heard because i don't know the world of theater like it's so good

00:25:26.380 like it would make a rat clap that's okay it made me laugh out loud i'll take a second with this

00:25:32.420 before we return to our meal so what i find so devastating on that is it is there is an art

00:25:40.520 there is this person has a ability with words with imagery with wit okay i'm sorry they're

00:25:47.140 using it in service of taking down another piece of art when when someone who's able to come up

00:25:54.220 with would make a rat clap should hang it up and go make a play. I just I know. OK, I know. But

00:26:03.340 I also don't know. I also think it's wrong. Yeah, it's OK. I hear you.

00:26:17.800 Ever feel like you're being chased by the marriage police?

00:26:21.800 Welcome to Boys and Girls, the podcast where dating isn't dating.

00:26:25.700 It's a full-on love triathlon.

00:26:28.280 A morning what-if, an evening maybe, and a 3pm chai with a could-this-please-be-the-one.

00:26:35.200 Because in the arranged marriage universe, you're basically on a sushi conveyor belt.

00:26:39.300 And like raw fish, you've got a shelf life.

00:26:42.960 And the wild part? You're not just looking for someone you like.

00:26:46.140 You're casting for a mythical hero your entire family approves of.

00:26:50.020 A saint, a demigod, a unicorn.

00:26:53.020 I know because years ago, I sacrificed myself to this chaotic, soul-crushing tradition,

00:26:58.040 hoping to find love the correct way. 1.00

00:27:00.780 Boys and Girls is our absurd, cringy, heartfelt ride through the highs and lows of the Indian-arranged marriage, 0.94

00:27:06.960 finally giving you the validation and healing you deserve. 1.00

00:27:10.800 Listen to Boys and Girls starting February 19th on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:27:18.320 This is Ryder Strong, and I have a new podcast called The Red Weather.

00:27:22.000 It was many and many a year ago in a kingdom by the sea.

00:27:27.200 In 1995, my neighbor, Anna Trainor, disappeared from a commune.

00:27:31.120 It was hard to wrap your head around. It was nature and trees and praying and drugs.

00:27:36.220 So no, I am not your guru.

00:27:39.400 And back then, I lied to my parents, I lied to police, I lied to everybody.

00:27:44.840 There were years, right, where I could not say your name.

00:27:47.820 I've decided to go back to my hometown in Northern California, interview my friends, family, talk to police, journalists, whomever I can, to try to find out what actually happened.

00:27:56.660 Isn't it a little bit weird that they obsess over hippies in the woods and not the obvious boyfriend?

00:28:01.240 They have had this case for 30 years. 0.95

00:28:04.000 I'll teach you sons of a** to come around here and my wife. Boom, boom. 0.90

00:28:08.280 This is The Red Weather.

00:28:11.480 Listen to The Red Weather on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:28:18.280 The more you listen to your kids, the closer you'll be.

00:28:22.260 So we asked kids, what do you want your parents to hear?

00:28:26.280 I feel sometimes that I'm not listened to.

00:28:28.580 I would just want you to listen to me more often and evaluate situations with me and lead me towards success.

00:28:35.360 Listening is a form of love.

00:28:36.980 Find resources to help you support your kids and their emotional well-being at SoundItOutTogether.org.

00:28:43.820 That's SoundItOutTogether.org.

00:28:46.340 Brought to you by the Ad Council and Pivotal.

00:28:48.740 Crook and Chase Nashville chats with the coolest cat in country music.

00:28:52.460 He is edgy. He's fun. He is Chase Matthews.

00:28:55.800 Keith Urban helped make him a global sensation last year, but it's his recent number one hit darling that put Chase on the map

00:29:01.540 and launched a fun and difficult conversation about lovers who cheat and lie.

00:29:06.680 That's why I'm scared to get married.

00:29:08.160 You're giving me trust issues, brother.

00:29:09.700 Crook and Chase Nashville Chats with Chase Matthew.

00:29:12.420 Listen and subscribe on the iHeartRadio app,

00:29:14.860 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts.

00:29:24.560 Wait, let's continue back to the meal.

00:29:26.740 Okay.

00:29:28.060 Oh, the tomatoes are out of season, yeah.

00:29:30.060 So I start defending my honor going,

00:29:32.920 well, Kate, I mean, but of course,

00:29:34.640 But I assume that a restaurant like this.

00:29:37.320 And I said, well, if it's on the menu, they're not going to serve it.

00:29:40.200 If it's on the menu, then they've got the tomatoes somehow and they're doing it.

00:29:43.580 I started arguing that maybe they had like a climate controlled like tomato factory in the back.

00:29:49.260 Yeah.

00:29:50.480 Yeah.

00:29:52.000 So I'm struggling with wanting it, the whole thing.

00:29:54.900 And then I even like as though the waiter would be a shame for me if I ordered something that's on the menu.

00:30:00.640 I felt the need to ask him.

00:30:02.180 So tomatoes in November.

00:30:03.520 It was as if, how quickly, okay, the student stole the countenance of the teacher, you.

00:30:10.980 How quickly.

00:30:12.000 This is how people hurt each other, right?

00:30:14.440 I felt ashamed for thinking it was safe to order a tomato in November.

00:30:18.080 And I turned to the waiter and go, I will, now I will essentially shame you for having

00:30:22.660 it on the menu while hoping that he convinces me that I can still get it.

00:30:26.980 Whatever.

00:30:28.020 And he does.

00:30:28.840 We put together an order.

00:30:29.880 We're a little worried it's not enough food.

00:30:31.360 and you say

00:30:33.460 what did I say

00:30:35.660 what did I say

00:30:36.500 can I say it or no

00:30:37.760 yeah yeah say it

00:30:38.500 I don't remember

00:30:38.940 okay okay

00:30:39.500 and then we were

00:30:40.800 you were like

00:30:44.180 whatever it's an actress meal

00:30:45.220 it's an actress's meal

00:30:46.040 oh I forgot

00:30:46.840 no no sorry

00:30:47.440 I forgot about that

00:30:48.840 it's an actress's order

00:30:49.640 I wasn't like starving either

00:30:51.480 that's the thing

00:30:52.200 my appetite was like

00:30:53.400 I was like

00:30:53.780 I don't know how much

00:30:54.460 I can even eat tonight

00:30:55.680 yeah

00:30:55.980 yeah I

00:30:57.100 well then also

00:30:57.780 you know what I thought

00:30:58.320 I don't know what I was

00:30:58.760 I can't remember

00:30:59.340 I didn't even say this to you Jacqueline

00:31:01.060 Can't imagine.

00:31:01.460 In my mind, I went, they're going to send an app or two.

00:31:04.380 Oh, wow.

00:31:05.660 In my mind, I go, let's put this order in.

00:31:09.500 They're going to send over an app.

00:31:10.940 I think it wasn't just in your mind.

00:31:12.640 I think I recall you saying, well, dessert's coming.

00:31:15.100 Oh, yeah.

00:31:15.760 I was like, they're going to get a tower of profiterole on this table.

00:31:20.720 Yeah.

00:31:21.420 So then we eat the meal.

00:31:24.380 It's great, as always.

00:31:26.600 Delicious.

00:31:27.720 And then eventually, it's check time.

00:31:30.440 we're anticipating the check being dropped

00:31:33.700 we start talking about no i we start talking about i was shocked okay that you thought

00:31:43.660 there would be anything okay you weren't shocked you didn't know i was hoping yeah no i was hoping

00:31:52.000 when you're like round of drinks you know like this i was like okay our drinks aren't going to

00:31:56.840 be on that bill i think your thought was like they were playing it cool the whole meal right

00:32:02.700 because we're kind of going like i don't know if this waiter knows what's happening here i don't

00:32:08.720 think he's been informed yeah eyes darting around the restaurant waiting for the customers to

00:32:14.040 perhaps inform inform the staff so we've been let down by by all well the dessert because we didn't

00:32:21.300 order dessert we were like oh the meal was amazing we're full too full for dessert i thought

00:32:26.620 maybe here comes a slice of cake on the plate and written in hot fudge we love you or something I

00:32:36.660 wouldn't that would have been amazing but I wouldn't have been shocked I'd be like yeah

00:32:40.800 I thought we were gonna get something like that so the the dessert never arrives okay so then I

00:32:48.840 in my mind I go well drinks are off the right probably and I did feel because I've it there's

00:32:55.340 such a gamut okay there are places that you go every night for two years and you never see a

00:33:00.200 free drink you never see a friendly smile right so you just you just never know and uh i felt i

00:33:08.420 had to lower your expectations because you know lowered expectations it doesn't hurt if if then

00:33:15.560 you know if the dessert's coming it'll come and maybe it'll be even more exciting so but i was

00:33:20.820 like, I don't think it's happening. And you were like, no, you were like nowhere. You're like

00:33:26.240 nothing. I'm like, I'm not convinced anything has been clocked here tonight. I was like, I think

00:33:33.500 this is a lovely meal at a great restaurant. And that's all it is. Yeah. Yeah. Which is a lot,

00:33:43.140 which is, you know, lovely middle, great restaurant. But so I'm, I think to myself,

00:33:47.340 And I'm embarrassed to say, I think, oh, yeah, the drinks are coming off this tab.

00:33:51.420 And then I think to myself, and this is really, this is where I feel embarrassed.

00:33:57.240 I thought there was a chance the waiter was going to come and say, your meal has been taken care of.

00:34:08.160 I thought he's going to lean forward.

00:34:10.400 I pictured him, hands behind the back, nod.

00:34:14.280 Your money's no good here.

00:34:15.940 Get home.

00:34:16.260 I thought we were going to get

00:34:18.200 Get out of here

00:34:18.940 Something like that

00:34:19.480 Get out of here

00:34:20.040 I don't want any filthy money

00:34:21.140 And I thought like

00:34:22.280 Well that would be like

00:34:23.180 Really over the top

00:34:24.220 Right

00:34:24.540 But I thought

00:34:25.940 Who knows

00:34:26.340 So the checks dropped

00:34:28.280 I grab it feverishly

00:34:30.680 I scan

00:34:31.260 I scan

00:34:31.800 Every item I counted for

00:34:34.000 Now what if

00:34:37.280 What if there had been

00:34:38.180 Just regular old check

00:34:39.480 And a little heart

00:34:40.840 Okay

00:34:41.480 And it said

00:34:42.240 Love Poog

00:34:42.860 Would have gone a long way

00:34:43.860 Like we love Poog

00:34:44.700 Would have gone a long way

00:34:45.780 yeah now do you think and again this is more fantasies where people know who we are and the 1.00

00:34:52.940 whole thing it's a secondary layer because i was just fantasizing about you know two pooghags at 0.95

00:34:58.200 dinner that night seeing us march into jar seeing us looking around expectantly seeing us not be

00:35:06.440 feted oh my god yeah so i mean i had a great night love jar forever wonderful evening but

00:35:13.780 and then we were dying we were cackling or cackling on the street because of our

00:35:18.880 audacity assumption our what's it called grandeur our delusions of grandeur yeah yeah well then i

00:35:25.920 start to i mean i'm starting to go well maybe maybe these people posting you know a jar and

00:35:32.400 the whole thing like maybe this is more this has happened twice and in our minds it's like

00:35:39.400 the place is overflowing with listeners who come in saying you know poog sent me whatever we're

00:35:45.620 here we're here for a poog night and it's actually like only a couple but i don't know i don't know

00:35:52.200 i don't know i don't i mean the other thing is yeah no go go no it's because i had a fantasy of

00:35:58.820 of the chef texting the general manager tonight make sure to you know whatever whatever we want

00:36:04.580 to send them and the phone she fell asleep with the phone in her hand and the text was unsent

00:36:09.660 and she's like in marrakesh and the phone falls onto the hotel floor so you think

00:36:15.760 human error you think this is human error not i've been rocking my brain about what happened

00:36:21.900 something had to have happened and i'll say this jacqueline you and i both were like do we even

00:36:27.160 talk about this on poog because the last thing we want because we have no anger we have no but we

00:36:33.780 well listen i'll be back in a couple months springtime at jar yeah sounds great well what

00:36:45.840 all no i didn't yeah i certainly didn't want to come off uh you know whatever i think next time

00:36:50.660 we go in we go in like monks oh yeah we go in humbly we go in yeah i mean that's that's the

00:36:56.080 medicine uh we needed it wasn't it really was the word the name of our podcast written in fudge

00:37:02.400 or written in the blood of our check okay it's to be reminded well first of all on principle

00:37:11.040 there's nothing uglier in the world right than doing something that someone didn't ask for

00:37:17.460 and then expecting something in return right right so to merge into jar like

00:37:21.860 uh hello when they might be like we never asked for your promotion we don't require your promotion

00:37:29.900 If anything, the people who have come here as a result of listening to your podcast have been some of the most disturbing people.

00:37:40.640 Could you stop mentioning it?

00:37:43.520 Yeah, yeah.

00:37:52.380 Ever feel like you're being chased by the marriage police?

00:37:55.060 Welcome to Boys and Girls, the podcast where dating isn't dating.

00:38:00.340 It's a full-on love triathlon.

00:38:02.940 A morning what-if, an evening maybe, and a 3pm chai with a could-this-please-be-the-one.

00:38:09.840 Because in the arranged marriage universe, you're basically on a sushi conveyor belt.

00:38:13.940 And like raw fish, you've got a shelf life.

00:38:17.600 And the wild part? You're not just looking for someone you like.

00:38:20.800 You're casting for a mythical hero your entire family approves of.

00:38:24.480 a saint, a demigod, a unicorn.

00:38:27.660 I know because years ago I sacrificed myself

00:38:30.260 to this chaotic, soul-crushing tradition

00:38:32.460 hoping to find love the correct way.

00:38:35.440 Boys and Girls is our absurd, cringy, heartfelt ride 1.00

00:38:38.660 through the highs and lows of the Indian arranged marriage, 0.96

00:38:41.600 finally giving you the validation and healing you deserve.

00:38:45.880 Listen to Boys and Girls starting February 19th

00:38:48.600 on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

00:38:51.020 or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:38:52.740 This is Ryder Strong, and I have a new podcast called The Red Weather.

00:38:57.060 It was many and many a year ago in a kingdom by the sea.

00:39:02.020 In 1995, my neighbor, Anna Trainor, disappeared from a commune.

00:39:05.860 It was hard to wrap your head around.

00:39:07.180 It was nature and trees and praying and drugs.

00:39:10.820 So no, I am not your guru.

00:39:14.600 And back then, I lied to my parents.

00:39:17.220 I lied to police.

00:39:18.500 I lied to everybody.

00:39:19.480 There were years, Ryder, where I could not say your name.

00:39:22.260 I've decided to go back to my hometown in Northern California,

00:39:25.160 interview my friends, family, talk to police, journalists,

00:39:27.960 whomever I can to try to find out what actually happened.

00:39:31.300 Isn't it a little bit weird that they obsess over hippies in the woods

00:39:34.220 and not the obvious boyfriend?

00:39:35.900 They have had this case for 30 years. 0.98

00:39:38.820 I'll teach you sons of **** to come around here and my wife. 0.97

00:39:41.860 Boom, boom. 0.99

00:39:43.160 This is The Red Weather.

00:39:46.180 Listen to The Red Weather on the iHeartRadio app,

00:39:48.660 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:39:52.920 The more you listen to your kids, the closer you'll be.

00:39:57.000 So we asked kids, what do you want your parents to hear?

00:40:00.980 I feel sometimes that I'm not listened to.

00:40:03.240 I would just want you to listen to me more often

00:40:05.200 and evaluate situations with me and lead me towards success.

00:40:10.020 Listening is a form of love.

00:40:12.240 Find resources to help you support your kids

00:40:14.620 and their emotional well-being at SoundItOutTogether.org.

00:40:18.300 That's SoundItOutTogether.org.

00:40:20.680 Brought to you by the Ad Council and Pivotal.

00:40:23.420 Crook and Chase Nashville chats with the coolest cat in country music.

00:40:27.100 He is edgy.

00:40:27.920 He's fun.

00:40:28.940 He is Chase Matthews.

00:40:30.440 Keith Urban helped make him a global sensation last year,

00:40:33.180 but it's his recent number one hit darling to put Chase on the map

00:40:36.200 and launched a fun and difficult conversation about lovers who cheat and lie.

00:40:41.440 That's why I'm scared to get married.

00:40:42.800 You're giving me trust issues, brother.

00:40:44.340 Crook and Chase Nashville chats with Chase Matthews.

00:40:47.060 Listen and subscribe on the iHeartRadio app,

00:40:49.500 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts.

00:40:59.360 Somebody recommended for me some throat-soothing tea,

00:41:03.020 and they were like,

00:41:03.620 you need to drink this when you're doing your show.

00:41:06.060 And honey, don't come in here with a throat coat, okay?

00:41:08.620 And I have a huge tea announcement,

00:41:10.260 which is that a friend was telling me about how tea in the bags,

00:41:13.620 classic boxed shelf-stable tea, is like garbage.

00:41:16.960 It's literally mold and dust, to quote her.

00:41:19.200 like we cannot be ingesting it. The tea industry is like ruled by exploitation and hell. It's like

00:41:25.700 the darkest industry. And so there's a company called Rare Tea, Rare Tea Company. And I just

00:41:31.420 want to give them a little plug because they're, you know, ethical. The teas are great. So it's

00:41:35.860 all about whole leaf tea for 2023. It's totally affordable. Talking about a gorgeous tin of tea

00:41:44.100 for, you know, I mean, it's more expensive than a box, but you know, 10 bucks maybe for like a

00:41:49.280 $7 loose baby loose. So you got to get a steeper in the whole thing. You got to get a steeper in

00:41:56.040 the whole thing. But let me tell you the other night I had, cause I ordered some of their

00:42:00.020 peppermint or spearmint tea. I had it. Oh, and this was, I was going to say some POOG listener

00:42:04.720 sent us the sweetest little baby teapot for loose leaf straining. Do you recall? I do not.

00:42:11.380 you got it this is early poo this is your anger this is the early days of poo anyway thank you

00:42:17.040 to whoever sent that and I used that little darling teapot to to strain my peppermint tea

00:42:22.560 picture it and it was but I might be right gone and it was just and then here I was and this was

00:42:27.580 very mornings could be huge I was like loose leaves huge this is the routine I'll do this

00:42:32.000 till my deep into my 90s yeah and having a little moment with myself I was writing in my journal

00:42:37.120 drinking loose leaf tea can you imagine oh wow i mean it was unreal it was spectacular

00:42:43.620 tea but we got it we got to get over the bags classic celestial seasonings

00:42:48.860 yeah see that stuff what about the ears off there's

00:42:52.300 well there's something about like pulling like what is tea right like you're using boiling water

00:43:00.400 to pull the essence right potently out of something and if those items are dust and mold

00:43:06.520 and wood shavings and cardboard from, you know, I mean, can you imagine like how easy it would be

00:43:13.180 to just, oh, we didn't get the shipment. Let's drop in some sneakers. Finally ground paper.

00:43:20.280 Absolutely. But why is the bag the problem? Okay. If it's loose, you're not mortar and pestling it,

00:43:26.540 right? There's, I don't know enough to speak on the subject and therefore I will extensively,

00:43:30.980 but I think that, I mean, of course, you know, there was this, you started to see this,

00:43:35.180 the upscale tea bag right which is plastic like a net so that releases literally like

00:43:40.300 an orca's amount of plastic like into your mouth it's like you are having you're not having tea

00:43:49.120 you're having plastic like you're having the boiling equivalent oh well this also made me go

00:43:54.440 really spin out so hey everyone you go to starbucks or whatever they pour your hot hot

00:44:00.600 water into the BPA lined cup and then you have the plastic top. So you're steeping, you're having,

00:44:07.160 and then that, that hot water is just absorbing, absorbing the BPA, all of it. You're running it

00:44:11.760 through the top of the little mouth spigot of plastic. And you're just really imbibing a cup

00:44:18.460 of toxins right there. Something to think about. I really have to start decanting my factor meals

00:44:24.360 out of the plastic. It's BPA free and the whole thing, but you got to decant.

00:44:29.140 leave but i gotta get it i have been on a hunt for because i still want the kind of tv meal

00:44:35.660 experience i enjoy the sections it's very fun yeah tv dinner kind of thing like an advent calendar

00:44:41.740 you ever had that as a child no like if you ever had like we're going to the supermarket my parents

00:44:45.700 had weight watchers for a while and i remember their cuisines and i'd be like please can i have

00:44:50.420 a swedish meatball lean cuisine and i remember that and like ripping off the plastic well and

00:44:56.780 know it's like it's so weird that they're like like sofas I think that's a plastic tin with 0.90

00:45:02.680 plastic cover and it's supposed to go in the goddamn oven yeah it's crazy not even just the

00:45:06.680 microwave it's like yeah it's like grilling in there yeah um but I'm looking for something I 0.94

00:45:14.460 can easily because it has to be microwaved I'm not taking it to the pan that's not the point here 0.99

00:45:19.380 that's okay three minutes okay and i bless the microwave okay i remember this woman in a like 0.92

00:45:27.440 crystal shop in new york east west books um she was selling young living oils as a side sort of

00:45:34.540 so young living oils is like essential oils but they i think there's a multi-level marketing

00:45:40.040 element or at least there's an option where you can have a suitcase okay full of these oils and

00:45:46.860 you can sell them. Okay. There's a very least you can order a suitcase and sell it. So she was kind

00:45:51.740 of, I think selling it sort of half out of the store or something. And one of them was black 1.00

00:45:56.840 pepper. And these were, there were the food grade ones, you know, and she said that if you dropped

00:46:01.920 this particular black pepper essence, whatever in to like lesser food, it would raise the vibration

00:46:08.340 of the of all the food oh yeah yeah totally now that that's appealing i love that the um

00:46:17.020 uh i had a friend telling me how she was she like had a hair someone who was like a hairstylist

00:46:23.520 was like peddling a lot of olaplex was like olaplex olaplex olaplex is the best right

00:46:28.540 and that he was like you can even use this as there was a hair mask and he's like you can use

00:46:34.240 as a face mask he's like you can just put it on your face let it sit for 20 minutes and she was

00:46:38.000 like just that level of being so in with the product but that's Olaplex though I feel like

00:46:47.020 there are a lot of places that are like Olaplex salons where I've been like okay is it just that

00:46:53.160 good or or are they running yeah possibly like this an intense campaign where they're just paying

00:47:03.720 salons and yeah i don't know product and whatever to become and we'll take a box of olaplex let me

00:47:10.660 tell you i like the hair oil and i have purchased it myself um and then i'm going to do a hard left

00:47:17.300 turn into acupuncture i uh a dear friend as you would say very sweetly gave me a session with this

00:47:26.920 unbelievable body worker a couple days ago if it's the friend that sent you the pie on thanksgiving

00:47:33.160 who no no no it's a different okay I was gonna say this friend's doing too much okay listen I

00:47:40.240 get there on the table this guy is unbelievable he immediately starts pressing me going oh yeah

00:47:45.760 you're right hip here giving me that structural understanding things he's like also knows about

00:47:51.580 Chinese medicine stick out your tongue he's like he looks at my tongue he goes oh you're like in a

00:47:56.140 lot of emotional distress right now aren't you I was like yeah and then he's like we're gonna do

00:48:02.240 emotional stuff on you today. I was like, great. He starts, he puts needles. He starts massaging

00:48:06.400 this little point on my foot. Hurts so badly in this way that I can't even fathom. He sticks

00:48:11.780 a needle. Boom, boom. Each foot. Boom, boom. Each shin. My stomach. My hands. The needles are in

00:48:18.700 there. I'm doing deep breathing. He's massaging my head. I start weeping on the table. It was,

00:48:25.120 yeah, oh yeah, baby. I start weeping on the table. Get me in now. Get me in now. Get me in now.

00:48:31.060 he's like really sweet he's like let it go i'm like weeping and then somehow just kind of

00:48:36.860 eventually it stops my tears are getting on my hands for sure he's massaging my head what

00:48:41.220 just tears or is there at first no no there's sounds at first there just was a steady stream

00:48:46.260 of hot tears and then i said no those kinds of things yeah yeah fully amazing fully and i feel

00:48:54.600 just fine with it like i'm not holding back i'm just kind of like yeah i mean i wasn't going you

00:48:58.480 No, but I was, I was crying. Okay. And then somehow it kind of stops. So key point before

00:49:04.240 he put needles in, he was kind of testing my flexibility. He was like, Oh wow. See,

00:49:07.520 I can barely get this leg here, this he's presses on this part of my sternum. And I'm like, Oh,

00:49:12.380 that's really tender there. He's doing this little tender spots on my neck. Oh, that hurts.

00:49:16.800 He brings the needles out suddenly, honey, I am flexible. My leg that 20 minutes ago couldn't go

00:49:22.820 here. It's going there. No, he presses on my place on my sternum that was really tender before

00:49:27.440 painless he presses on the place on my foot that was really hurting a second ago the fucking pain 0.96

00:49:32.020 is gone did he go let's see how this room feels now no oh no he goes he well yeah like afterwards 0.96

00:49:38.240 he pressed on these spots which i don't have a problem with i just how does that feel now and i

00:49:41.140 was like wow now that's fine he i mean it was he was like you're gonna be really tired later

00:49:45.740 don't eat any raw food eat like warming foods i sat up drank some broth instantly

00:49:52.980 and whoa felt the release and that passed out dead asleep at like 8 30 I couldn't stay awake

00:50:02.000 slept woke up the next morning eyes open around 7 30 8 a.m steady steam of tears from like 8 to

00:50:10.160 12 30 I texted you I was like this is crazy I'm just like crying crying crying crying he texted

00:50:14.420 me he was like how are you I was like well I uh slept really well my body feels great but I

00:50:19.040 can't stop crying. And he was like, yep, totally. Like do some squats, do some breathing. But this

00:50:24.780 guy, this guy, and I'm going to New York and I'm like, I need to do weekly acupuncture. I have to

00:50:30.540 get back into it. Yes. I did acupuncture for a little while for migraines, like many, many years

00:50:35.920 ago, but didn't commit because it was so expensive. And I just was like, I can't do this like every

00:50:39.760 week, but I'm feeling like I got to. When's the last time you did acupuncture? I've done it once

00:50:46.220 in my life. Yeah. So calling all New York body workers and acupuncture practitioners.

00:50:50.760 I wonder if there's any, when we're in New York together, if there's any treatments that would be

00:50:55.580 worth doing simultaneously. And my job, I like the listeners can't see my jaw,

00:51:00.360 my eyes and mouth just widened. Remembering a, we're both going to be in New York at the same

00:51:03.600 time. B I'm doing a major call out of, um, yeah, to everyone, of course, cause I'm going to be

00:51:09.480 there for a couple of months. I need the body work, the treatments, all of it.

00:51:13.500 we have to do a major spa day yeah I'm in the mood for that I'm in the mood I you know I keep

00:51:19.260 intending to I mean that's the thing it's like I mean I've said this a thousand times but just

00:51:24.300 you know oh you know in crisis then you try to start the meditation practice it's like I know

00:51:28.840 I know no and I'm really I'm realizing truly over a month now like the phone just being like

00:51:35.300 not in my life the way it's been for so long I'm journaling wow the journaling's huge I actually

00:51:42.220 have to do it every day. Journaling is huge. And yet I resist because I'm afraid of meeting my own

00:51:49.060 mind, I guess. And yet I'm afraid to be without it. So what? You got to get into journaling and

00:51:55.520 I'm, I got to do the meditation now. Need it now. Gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta. I mean, I guess,

00:52:03.240 I don't know. Will we ever develop habits? I know. I don't know if I'll ever develop a habit.

00:52:10.180 It's really, guess who hasn't Gua Sha in 10 days? 0.87

00:52:14.720 Me. 1.00

00:52:15.140 Remember the Gua Sha changed my life? 1.00

00:52:17.160 Guess who put it down? 1.00

00:52:18.540 Me.

00:52:19.180 Oh, wow.

00:52:20.520 I got to get back.

00:52:22.280 I mean, the closest I've had is probably like my consistency with doing Tracy.

00:52:28.140 Yeah.

00:52:28.880 I'm trying to think what else I've had, but like, I just, I can't, you know, start, there's

00:52:33.940 a book, Atomic Habits, right?

00:52:35.720 once again healed by a title but it's you know making like I think it's like making one

00:52:40.460 degree changes kind of thing like add up big time you know so it's like instead of oh these big

00:52:47.520 changes well that's the thing because guess what I'm also off I was really on to my Melissa and I

00:52:52.240 was really committed 15 minutes a day and then like I got home one night and I just like like 0.67

00:52:57.600 literally was like wait is my ass like different now like suddenly I was like the 15 minutes a 0.92

00:53:02.900 day every day with you that's like hours a week you know yeah it's doing the math and i was like 0.99

00:53:08.600 wait what and then i had to stop because i was getting from the planks i think i was getting

00:53:13.980 this pain in my chest i pulled some muscles and i had to stop but i got to get back on but yeah

00:53:19.140 but i was doing i stopped i stopped yeah i mean the implementation of that which uh we know we

00:53:28.840 need to do and the refusal and then and then yeah I know that's it it's really hard it's hard to

00:53:35.580 it's absolutely hard to do anything but I also want to just throw in because as the listeners

00:53:40.200 might remember I was watching I was going to the Kardashians the last couple months yes dipping

00:53:44.760 in and out and becoming very consumed also I went on the skims website got the bras I'm loving the

00:53:49.960 bras okay oh my god yeah huge news but then I bought I couldn't resist I'm not I'm not proud

00:53:55.820 a Black Friday sale. I bought these sweatpants. He's like teddy bear. I was like, these are

00:54:00.800 going to be so cozy in New York in the winter. You mean the skims ones? Yeah. They're like, 1.00

00:54:04.820 yeah, I know. Like teddy bear brown. Yeah. They're insane. I put them on there. First of all,

00:54:09.260 they're made for someone who's six, four. Like there's so much fabric at the bottom. It's eerie

00:54:14.900 and they look, I'll be honest, awful. Like it's just crazy. Like they look, I don't know what,

00:54:21.120 I got to put them back on, but I put them on last night. Like, Ooh. And I was like, well,

00:54:24.160 all wear these in the home but right they look like they were made by someone who works at a

00:54:30.740 carnival like what I should buy a bear but what I actually meant was I was gonna say by a carnival

00:54:38.300 bear and I was like well I'm not gonna say that like a like a nice teddy bear made them yeah so

00:54:42.840 it's like where you're like I wish I had that sweet this was made of the teddy bear self yeah

00:54:48.500 this is lesser than the teddy bear but wait did you only get the pants no I got the pants and

00:54:53.540 There's a couple of bras in there that I haven't tried.

00:54:55.120 Cause the one skimmed bra that I got, I love.

00:54:57.440 No, no, no.

00:54:57.840 They're just like regular bras.

00:54:59.120 See, I feel like those teddy bear, and I could have this wrong,

00:55:01.340 but those lounge sets that I've seen from them,

00:55:03.860 it only looks good if you're a full teddy bear.

00:55:06.960 Yeah.

00:55:07.560 You can't have teddy bear pants and a shirt.

00:55:09.560 I mean, you can do anything with colors.

00:55:10.940 You're right.

00:55:11.400 You're right.

00:55:11.760 No, I almost, I got to post a picture on the Pooh Instagram.

00:55:14.640 Yeah.

00:55:15.200 Because these pants are like, they're, it's just comical how like bad they look.

00:55:19.840 On me.

00:55:20.520 I don't know.

00:55:20.940 it's just anyway it's we're like two weeks out of christmas can you believe this me alone on

00:55:26.240 christmas in new york you're never alone if you're in new york it's gonna be hard yeah well i agree

00:55:32.700 and we're we're gonna work on that we're gonna figure that out great i started googling like

00:55:36.340 christmas cocktail recipes and then also christmas mocktail recipes like because like i i can't like

00:55:44.460 add something to christmas eve that like doesn't account for like the non-drinkers do you know

00:55:49.320 what I mean like I'm doing a fun thing this year and it's like only for for myself but then you go

00:55:54.800 what is you know what's exciting to drink what I love a Pimm's cup and you can do a virgin Pimm's

00:56:02.080 cup kind of what is Pimm's cup again I forgot already forgetting it was it was one of those

00:56:06.280 things where I was having Pimm's cup ginger one Christmas I was completely obsessed with Pimm's

00:56:12.340 cup. So what it is, is Pimms, liquor, lemon juice, ginger. It's really just Pimms, lemon juice,

00:56:21.080 ginger. And then you do a cucumber slice, mint, a lemon wheel, an orange wheel, put it on ice.

00:56:26.620 And what's great is that it's a pitcher cocktail, so you can make it for a group. It's great.

00:56:30.560 Because I remember one Christmas. Well, that's the other thing.

00:56:32.260 For everyone. You once had a party 15 years ago, and I think there were two punch bowls.

00:56:39.060 and yes yes it was so fucking cool so I started looking at Christmas punch too but I'm trying to

00:56:44.620 like because I love making a punch to me the the mocktail or to even use that word isn't even what

00:56:50.200 I want like a fun Christmas drink it's like it shouldn't be like mimicking the cocktail it has

00:56:56.200 to be good on something like for example like a mulled cider is just delicious right like a hot

00:57:01.480 mulled like apple cider I don't even know what mulled is but you know what I mean like kind of

00:57:05.200 like that one I have at Thanksgiving with the cranberry and the cloves and the cinnamon sticks

00:57:11.400 and the whole thing. So I'm like, that is an option. I'm imagining this like basic. Okay.

00:57:15.700 A couple of things. One eggnog. I love it. I love one of the four sickos that would get the eggnog

00:57:20.760 latte. Whoa. I'd get it at Starbucks. Damn. Like one eggnog latte for me, please. Like,

00:57:28.120 yum. And it's sort of. I used to get the white chocolate mocha at Starbucks after school as a

00:57:32.800 child god shantico we've talked about shantico right no shantico starbucks had a thing and i

00:57:42.800 used to drink this in high school and like i think it was the ninth grade they had a drinking

00:57:46.680 chocolate called shantico or shantico and it was like a little it was like an espresso but it was 0.68

00:57:52.200 fucking chocolate maybe it was like a little thing and it was dense it was like the densest 0.90

00:57:58.760 hot chocolate what's that company in new york they always have the um you know those the market 0.99

00:58:05.020 holiday markets in new york god strolling through those the one in columbus circle the one in like

00:58:10.740 um bryant park you know honestly are you ready no i've this is actually my first christmas in

00:58:15.540 new york city can you believe that oh okay god is that true well yeah it is maybe we'll go together

00:58:20.320 because it's really fun even though i don't know i'm not gonna i'm not gonna obsess and try to

00:58:25.000 lock you down but yeah no yeah and you you know you go you get um the one that would go into

00:58:32.180 columbus circle these huge gingerbread cookies gingerbread men and women okay and

00:58:39.760 and i get that and the hot slider just like calling them men and women that like

00:58:48.660 like it's one thing to say ginger man or whatever gingerbread woman i've never even heard

00:58:55.000 I think they add a skirt, you know, it's very much, you know, that sense, but, and then hot

00:59:00.200 cider and then I'm going to have to offline. I'm going to have to do low stress here. Cause I want

00:59:04.620 to stress you out, but I'm gonna have to do some offline Christmas talk with you. I know you're

00:59:08.140 already thinking about me with love for Christmas. Hugely. Okay. I know. I know. There's factors in

00:59:13.580 motion. Okay. It's what we'll do. We'll do it offline. Okay. Great. And we'll have to celebrate

00:59:18.120 Christmas in some way with the, with the show as we did. We did a live, you'll recall when I was

00:59:23.320 sobbing in California. We did a Christmas drink or whatever. We did ranch riders on Christmas.

00:59:29.360 I was sobbing. No, I had been because I had to stay in California. Oh, that's right. That's

00:59:35.600 right. Of course. COVID, blah, blah, blah. Pandemic hell. Yes, of course. I remember a ranch rider

00:59:39.600 Christmas. Yeah. Yeah. And I haven't heard from them in a while, but I know I'm on their list.

00:59:45.100 And I drank a couple of ranch riders last night. I took a four pack of ranch rider to John's house.

00:59:51.000 did he like them did he try it had he tried oh yeah he's had a few yeah now what flavor

00:59:54.700 this was just a four pack of the vodka the chilton yeah i think so what color was it i'm

01:00:01.120 sorry i know pale like a very pale color it's a color i don't even know like beige yeah yeah i

01:00:09.240 think i think i know the one the jalapeno tequila one is is a fave i think i like the paloma and i

01:00:15.820 like the tequila ones well here's an ad for ranch rider so and they have been very generous to us

01:00:20.900 And we hope that continues in the new year.

01:00:23.160 Tequila ones are my favorite,

01:00:24.380 despite loving vodka and other contexts.

01:00:26.420 I want to say,

01:00:26.980 and I think the next episode of Poog,

01:00:28.880 we should do,

01:00:29.960 I think it'll be really fun to do a bit of a Christmas roundup wishlist stuff.

01:00:34.260 So I'm actually going to save it.

01:00:35.220 I'm just going to tease that for the next episode.

01:00:38.080 And Jacqueline's frozen for me. 0.86

01:00:40.060 I thought she was doing a loaded inhale and pause before speaking, 0.61

01:00:45.300 but she's just frozen.

01:00:47.780 And now of course,

01:00:49.320 wondering,

01:00:49.800 is she talking?

01:00:50.760 Am I frozen for her?

01:00:52.140 Am I here in the abyss?

01:00:53.580 I think I'm here in the abyss alone.

01:00:56.400 Okay, Jacqueline just texted me.

01:00:57.520 My computer just died.

01:00:59.320 So in a shocking twist of events,

01:01:03.080 I'm going to have to end this episode alone.

01:01:08.180 Thanks for listening.

01:01:10.300 In case she doesn't come back, I'll just say,

01:01:11.900 good night, good day, good night.

01:01:20.380 POOG. If you enjoyed POOG, please subscribe, rate, and review. If not, we will press charges.

01:01:50.380 This isn't just a podcast. It's unconventional therapy for your entire year.

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01:02:02.720 This is Ryder Strong, and I have a new podcast called The Red Weather.

01:02:05.880 In 1995, my neighbor, Anna Traynor, disappeared from a commune.

01:02:10.260 It was nature and trees and praying and drugs.

01:02:14.040 No, I am not your guru.

01:02:17.720 Back then, I lied to everybody.

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01:02:22.980 I'm going back to my hometown to uncover the truth.

01:02:26.520 Listen to The Red Weather on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

01:02:33.020 You know Roald Dahl. He thought up Willy Wonka and the BFG.

01:02:37.060 But did you know he was a spy?

01:02:39.340 In the new podcast, The Secret World of Roald Dahl, I'll tell you that story and much, much more.

01:02:45.180 What?

01:02:46.060 You probably won't believe it either.

01:02:47.420 Was this before he wrote his stories?

01:02:49.320 It must have been.

01:02:50.980 Okay, I don't think that's true.

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Poog with Kate Berlant and Jacqueline Novak - December 13, 2022

A Tower of Profiterole

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