Poog with Kate Berlant and Jacqueline Novak - Scratch on the Yacht

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00:02:35.440 Hi, I'm Kate Berlant.

00:02:36.900 I'm Jacqueline Novak.

00:02:38.000 And this is POOG,

00:02:39.160 an ongoing conversation about wellness

00:02:41.060 between two obsessive friends,

00:02:42.740 two untamable intellects.

00:02:44.520 This is our hobby. 0.95

00:02:45.360 This is our hell.

00:02:46.220 This is our naked desire for free products.

00:02:48.500 This is POOG.

00:02:49.920 Today's topic, loosely speaking,

00:02:51.780 colostrum.

00:02:52.420 to our body

00:02:53.640 a house I'll become

00:02:55.180 the fact that this is not an actual

00:03:00.960 we are not sponsored by Lima

00:03:03.240 I'm Lima-ing at the moment

00:03:05.280 wait

00:03:05.740 this is like

00:03:06.700 American Idol drinking Coca-Cola

00:03:08.460 yeah go get yours

00:03:09.440 this is insane

00:03:10.800 American Idol drinking Coca-Cola

00:03:13.500 and

00:03:14.720 Coke was paying for that

00:03:16.320 make no mistake

00:03:17.660 I'm just laughing

00:03:20.400 imagining if

00:03:21.120 I thought people were ignorant to the fact

00:03:23.500 that Coke was paying for that.

00:03:25.240 Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.

00:03:26.980 Okay, hello?

00:03:28.020 She's injured.

00:03:29.020 Sorry, okay, we're here.

00:03:30.000 I was just laughing with myself

00:03:31.320 and the eavesdroppers

00:03:32.500 that this is like on American Idol

00:03:34.360 where the judges have the cups of Coke, you know?

00:03:37.080 I don't know.

00:03:37.480 I've never seen a single frame.

00:03:38.800 Just Coke, Coke.

00:03:40.320 You'd love it, honestly.

00:03:41.620 I'm sure.

00:03:42.320 You'd love it.

00:03:43.260 Watching them audition and the whole thing

00:03:44.660 and someone comes in

00:03:45.540 and it's like, how are they going to be?

00:03:47.020 I always got spooked by like

00:03:48.340 when they have like the crazy person audition

00:03:50.940 you know what I mean

00:03:52.740 and everyone is so fake

00:03:54.260 like the producers

00:03:55.620 it feels weird

00:03:57.400 everyone's like um anyway

00:03:59.880 wait my marionette lines have gone out of control

00:04:03.240 look at the marionette lines

00:04:04.460 you're low res Kate 1.00

00:04:07.240 fuck 1.00

00:04:08.100 I blame your internet connection 1.00

00:04:09.480 what have you done

00:04:10.200 did you writhe and dance your way across the router

00:04:13.820 something has been weird with my internet for months

00:04:16.060 and I just choose to ignore it

00:04:17.520 well I mean who wants to make that a day

00:04:19.220 All right.

00:04:19.340 Let's launch in because there's a lot to say.

00:04:20.900 There's a lot to say.

00:04:21.500 I have a lot to say too.

00:04:22.320 We are Lima-ing and no one's paying.

00:04:23.700 We're Lima-ing.

00:04:24.260 Well, they paid meaning they sent us the Limas and I fell off.

00:04:27.400 Yesterday, I was feeling like, wait, I was like, my face is, something's happening.

00:04:32.120 So I was like, you need to zip.

00:04:33.460 So yesterday I did a zip.

00:04:34.900 Wow.

00:04:35.460 I did.

00:04:35.860 I've been doing the Dennis Gross light mask quite religiously.

00:04:38.620 I did it last night and I smashed my toe because I tried to live my life while wearing it.

00:04:42.760 Oh, no, no.

00:04:43.160 I just lay on my back.

00:04:44.460 Yeah.

00:04:44.760 If you, it's interesting.

00:04:46.100 I don't strap it on.

00:04:46.860 I use it as a three minute meditation.

00:04:49.120 Well, I strapped it on and was like, I guess because it has eye holes in my mind, that means you're supposed to live your life with it.

00:04:57.300 But it's actually just because they're trying not to blast the eyeballs.

00:05:00.520 Although I wouldn't mind a little red light right in the eyeball.

00:05:03.380 Right through the eyes.

00:05:04.580 Which is supposed to be good.

00:05:05.840 Go on.

00:05:06.420 Speak of your devices.

00:05:07.360 Speak of what's happening.

00:05:07.980 There's a lot to say.

00:05:08.480 There's a lot to say.

00:05:08.940 There's a lot to say.

00:05:09.520 Okay.

00:05:09.740 So, well, first of all, I'm having, this is when an ad works.

00:05:13.740 Well, by the way, the ads always work as we know.

00:05:15.700 I woke up looking at Instagram, of course, because I've relapsed, as we all know. I was served a

00:05:24.780 Saqqara ad of the metabolism chocolate powder. And there was a woman making it. 1.00

00:05:30.720 You have it. 0.94

00:05:31.900 Well, let me finish. I look at the ad. I look at the ad. I see a woman blending it into her coffee.

00:05:38.100 I go, fuck. And I go, Kate, you have it. I run to the kitchen, nude as usual, 1.00

00:05:46.720 find the sachets, blended. Here's what I did. I blended the Sakara metabolism powder into my- 0.99

00:05:55.320 Walnut milk?

00:05:56.020 No, honey, into my-

00:05:57.060 No, although I had been making my own walnut milk.

00:05:59.000 Okay.

00:05:59.280 No, into my Elmhurst cashew milk. And then I poured that into my coffee.

00:06:04.480 Whoa.

00:06:05.300 Wow. Really nice.

00:06:07.200 Was it good?

00:06:08.100 Yeah, it was good. It's very strong cacao because it's not sweetened. It's like barely

00:06:12.880 there's one gram of sugar in the powder in the sachet. So it's like, it's not a sweet thing.

00:06:17.800 No, I've been brutalized by that powder before. Like I like put it a little too eagerly into

00:06:21.820 something. It was a treat. It's not a treat. It was just going to be a nothing.

00:06:26.300 I like cacao though. What? Okay. You know what happened to me? This is where you're so deep into

00:06:32.820 the thing so i'm sitting there on instagram i don't say like i relapsed because i haven't

00:06:37.920 pretended to you know whatever i say an ad for the colostrum and they they show a photo that

00:06:45.140 is just like okay here's a hag on the left yeah and he's a gorgeous goddess on the right yeah

00:06:50.340 same woman only difference colostrum yeah yeah but i'm like i'm in okay i'm like i need to order 0.77

00:06:56.400 this and then i'm like something about this feels familiar go to the kitchen there it is

00:06:59.560 No, I don't know if they sent it or if I've ordered it before.

00:07:04.440 It's called like Armra.

00:07:05.820 I may have just been served it and bought it.

00:07:09.740 And then I served it again.

00:07:11.420 Well, there's been a lot in my house.

00:07:13.600 So I was experiencing stomach pain, bloating, discomfort, texting Jacqueline, something's wrong.

00:07:22.280 Like I was like, like my jeans were like, my jeans were, okay, we've all been through this, right?

00:07:28.100 Your jeans, you wash them.

00:07:29.560 And then they're so tight, which is a detail, Jaclyn, I didn't share with you.

00:07:32.660 My jeans have been washed. 1.00

00:07:33.780 You're an asshole. 1.00

00:07:34.260 So they were really tight. 1.00

00:07:35.220 You're a fool. 1.00

00:07:36.660 No, but they were really tight. 1.00

00:07:38.040 You thought you'd gained?

00:07:39.720 Well, I was like, whoa.

00:07:41.560 And they were really tight.

00:07:42.560 It was making me upset.

00:07:44.080 I was like, well, this is what happens.

00:07:45.200 You have to break them back in.

00:07:46.080 You have to wash your jeans.

00:07:47.220 Okay.

00:07:47.980 And so, but I was having some stomach issues.

00:07:51.020 I was like, or like, by the way, when you say stomach issues, here's what people think. 0.91

00:07:55.420 Diarrhea shitting. 0.93

00:07:56.320 Okay. 0.98

00:07:56.640 And I just want to say, that's not what it is.

00:07:58.420 when i say stomach issues this is it's like anyway and so i bought out of pocket this has

00:08:05.980 been served to me on instagram and such array a-r-r-a-e uh bloat pills like digestive interesting 0.89

00:08:13.240 whatever the fuck you're supposed to take after you eat and so i'm experimenting with that i 0.98

00:08:17.240 purchased that at erwan we're looking at 40 bucks we'll see and then i told you i would bloat i know 0.99

00:08:23.380 and then I told you already

00:08:24.380 I bought the

00:08:25.960 AJ

00:08:26.580 to collagen

00:08:27.940 I was playing with

00:08:28.680 wait I'm almost tempted

00:08:30.000 I'm almost tempted

00:08:32.420 to just do a

00:08:33.240 dramatic read of our text

00:08:34.580 because

00:08:34.840 sure do it

00:08:35.360 I know

00:08:36.200 there might be stuff

00:08:37.180 that we need cut after

00:08:38.120 let's just go for it anyway

00:08:39.200 you ready

00:08:39.640 yeah

00:08:40.180 oh this is pretty good

00:08:41.520 a couple things

00:08:42.960 wait wait wait

00:08:44.680 well I sent you a photo 1.00

00:08:45.460 of my ass 1.00

00:08:46.200 oh yeah that was 1.00

00:08:47.420 that feels like weeks ago

00:08:48.500 I send you nudes all the time

00:08:49.400 I was pouring through the airport

00:08:50.540 yeah

00:08:51.180 and a man caught it

00:08:52.220 okay

00:08:52.520 yeah

00:08:53.040 No, but I just see this thing.

00:08:55.320 Well, I have two things to say.

00:08:56.360 Remind me.

00:08:57.280 Well, actually, the text will keep me on chain.

00:08:59.560 Okay, I just want to say,

00:09:00.580 can I just tell you about ordering food

00:09:01.740 at the hotel really quick?

00:09:03.580 Please, please.

00:09:04.100 And then we'll come back to this.

00:09:04.700 That's what Poog is for.

00:09:07.020 So, because I see in here,

00:09:08.700 there was this text exchange.

00:09:10.200 Okay.

00:09:10.820 Oh, yeah.

00:09:11.880 Okay.

00:09:12.880 First of all, I go,

00:09:14.760 I played Poog brazenly in the Uber, frankly. 0.66

00:09:18.120 I can't believe that.

00:09:18.880 The driver loved it.

00:09:19.840 Oh my God, I love it.

00:09:20.820 Okay, my headphones died.

00:09:21.900 I needed to check the quality of the app and he was loving it.

00:09:27.660 Well, Jacqueline, Jacqueline audibly laughing.

00:09:29.800 See, this is what I'm talking about.

00:09:31.020 I will never forget.

00:09:32.260 I know I told you this, sorry to interrupt, but when I was doing my, I was doing a show

00:09:35.260 workshop in LA at my show, I see like four, like young kind of bros, like skatery, like

00:09:41.300 they're like 21, 22, like straight guys.

00:09:45.720 Like, and I was like, Whoa.

00:09:47.620 And then one of them after was like, I love, he was, he was like, I love Poob.

00:09:51.580 no he's like you get me through my grubhub deliveries like what i love it and this is like

00:09:56.160 a 22 year old like i was like are you fucking kidding me i almost fell to my knees and no it 0.77

00:10:02.360 was so beautiful this is when america i was like i was like this is when i could not believe it 0.91

00:10:07.700 to think and if he's listening now you have no idea what that did for me no what this is doing

00:10:14.400 for me i mean i don't you know there is please know that if you are the targeted classic okay

00:10:21.100 poog listener of course you are beloved you are you and we're a family you are the masses that

00:10:26.100 are required okay um but the rogue the unexpected listener the truck driver i continue to return to

00:10:35.260 and fetishize i know okay of course out there on the road bump bump bump okay stopping anyway so

00:10:41.440 okay hi hi sorry so i go frankly he loved it and even when he wasn't laughing you know when from

00:10:49.040 behind you can see someone's cheeks like oh my god from like a back angle you can fully see it

00:10:56.000 it was lifted it was the cheeks were erect skyward okay yeah and and just cackling okay it was like

00:11:04.220 it was like the best and yes I said it's my podcast I won't lie yes of course you have to

00:11:09.780 I was soaring and I had to and at the end like you know and I was like also doing this like

00:11:15.020 I'm sorry.

00:11:15.680 This is so whatever.

00:11:17.100 Yeah, of course.

00:11:18.380 And then I was so worried for him that I was going to get out of the...

00:11:24.060 It was Lyft.

00:11:24.680 It was Lyft.

00:11:25.200 And actually, he told me explicitly how Lyft is.

00:11:28.040 It's not just pink.

00:11:29.300 It is better for the drivers by a thousand million things.

00:11:32.540 It's real.

00:11:33.040 Really?

00:11:33.380 A thousand million?

00:11:33.820 Go Lyft based on my driver.

00:11:36.040 Like Uber.

00:11:37.780 You remember that, right?

00:11:39.280 You remember it was like Lyft's better for the driver?

00:11:40.700 I remember I made the permanent transfer to Lyft, but I know Lyft is still hell.

00:11:44.520 But yeah.

00:11:45.020 Well, that was the thing.

00:11:46.120 I was like, it was one of those things that almost became like,

00:11:48.100 and so like actually another about how like Abe Books is owned by Amazon or whatever.

00:11:52.360 I was one of those.

00:11:53.180 I've heard you all be like, apologies.

00:11:55.080 Yeah.

00:11:55.200 I'm going to find the true independent online bookseller. 1.00

00:11:58.920 I think there's one called like, fuck. 0.99

00:12:04.060 I can't remember. 1.00

00:12:05.500 Go to your local bookstore, have them order it for you.

00:12:07.660 Yes.

00:12:08.200 It's called How to Weep in Public.

00:12:09.800 You know, it's the urgency, the urgency, the convenience.

00:12:12.320 It's like very rarely do we truly need the book the next day, right?

00:12:15.020 You're like, I want to read it now.

00:12:16.680 Totally.

00:12:16.980 Let the bookstore order it for you.

00:12:18.580 Wait.

00:12:19.740 Okay.

00:12:20.700 And then you get to have another trip into the store and you get to go next time I come

00:12:24.640 because if you're at the bookstore, you go, next time I come, I'm going to go to the cheese

00:12:28.040 shop next door.

00:12:29.480 You see what I'm saying?

00:12:30.020 You get to plan the next trip.

00:12:31.380 I'm saying that because there was a cheese shop right next to the bookstore in the town

00:12:34.420 where I grew up.

00:12:34.980 Can you imagine a cheese shop?

00:12:36.960 I mean, not that those don't exist.

00:12:38.840 They do.

00:12:39.420 But so, okay, hold on.

00:12:42.200 Take me back.

00:12:42.760 so you're talking about the the driver and this oh yeah so i'm like and i'm so worried that he

00:12:46.980 was gonna i was gonna leave the lift and he was gonna my name was instantly gonna disappear

00:12:51.900 from the you know account for security you'd never find poo you'd never know and so i literally

00:12:57.520 it's like uh are you familiar with goop okay okay love it yeah i was like like trying to

00:13:04.320 i don't know i had to barrel forward because we were only 30 seconds t minus 30 for me getting

00:13:09.440 out of the car

00:13:10.020 and so I was like 1.00

00:13:10.560 he's one of the goop

00:13:11.280 Gwyneth Paltrow 0.73

00:13:12.040 I was like

00:13:12.320 we're sort of

00:13:12.900 like literally

00:13:13.760 I went with that

00:13:14.840 pitch just to get

00:13:15.980 the name

00:13:16.640 like I was like

00:13:17.640 so we're Pogue

00:13:18.180 screaming

00:13:19.500 I mean I was

00:13:20.400 soaring

00:13:20.760 it was after a show

00:13:21.700 yeah of course

00:13:22.740 okay yeah

00:13:23.320 goop backwards

00:13:23.800 Pogue

00:13:25.620 you know

00:13:25.980 I was like

00:13:27.520 he'll never be able

00:13:28.180 to find it

00:13:28.540 my name has

00:13:29.020 disappeared

00:13:29.460 whatever

00:13:29.820 so I was

00:13:30.900 worried before him

00:13:31.440 but

00:13:31.660 okay take me back

00:13:33.840 so are you ready

00:13:34.580 okay so thread

00:13:35.460 I played it in the

00:13:36.220 Uber recently

00:13:36.700 okay

00:13:37.020 this is our text thread

00:13:38.020 I go the derangement

00:13:38.760 around food shame mixed with determined to get what I want must discuss okay okay so then I go

00:13:45.620 I'm telling you I just ordered two salads steak and a charcuterie board okay yumbo I said yeah

00:13:53.820 okay and then I'm explaining you so basically I go I go to the guy I go you know I think I'll

00:14:00.380 also do the the baby lettuce salad because and I felt this need to like explain because I'd already

00:14:05.800 got into my main dish

00:14:06.840 and my order

00:14:07.300 and so I'm like

00:14:07.800 whatever

00:14:08.460 and I was like

00:14:08.920 because

00:14:09.320 and this is me

00:14:10.020 fighting on the salad

00:14:10.720 I go

00:14:10.920 because

00:14:11.640 I want to

00:14:13.340 because I finished

00:14:14.700 the sentence like that

00:14:15.320 for the person

00:14:16.400 and then

00:14:16.940 he loved it

00:14:17.960 he chuckled amiably

00:14:18.980 right

00:14:19.460 it's like 11 o'clock

00:14:20.240 sorry

00:14:21.320 I'm in a hotel

00:14:21.900 in Philadelphia

00:14:22.440 you ordered the main

00:14:23.100 and then he said

00:14:23.600 and I'm gonna add a salad

00:14:25.060 is that what is happening

00:14:26.120 so I've got

00:14:26.880 I've ordered one salad

00:14:27.920 okay

00:14:28.320 I've ordered

00:14:28.840 a charcuterie appetizer

00:14:30.860 yeah

00:14:31.340 I've ordered the peppercorn steak

00:14:32.660 which by the way

00:14:33.560 is a scourge

00:14:34.580 the peppercorn

00:14:35.380 in the room service,

00:14:37.120 it's always drenched in peppercorn.

00:14:38.740 I got to stop trying to make steak happen

00:14:40.320 at the hotel rooms, I think,

00:14:41.260 but it's so like-

00:14:42.140 What's wrong with drenched in peppercorn? 0.98

00:14:43.360 It's so fucking good. 0.98

00:14:44.380 By the way, I'm all ready 0.98

00:14:45.140 because I am going to jar.

00:14:46.360 I'm going to pop in with a quick jar.

00:14:47.700 Okay.

00:14:48.160 Love jar so much as we know

00:14:49.620 to say that I'm Poog.

00:14:50.520 By the way, love jar.

00:14:51.500 It's like we know

00:14:52.160 that I'm going this week

00:14:53.420 and Suzanne Tracht,

00:14:55.220 who could be listening right now. 0.56

00:14:56.480 Oh my God.

00:14:57.080 As we all know,

00:14:57.760 the lychee martini is back on the menu at jar 1.00

00:14:59.700 because of Poog. 0.98

00:15:01.080 Amazing. 1.00

00:15:01.500 And she texted me and she was like,

00:15:02.940 when are you coming in 1.00

00:15:03.700 for your goddamn martini. 1.00

00:15:04.960 Can you believe it? 1.00

00:15:05.480 And then you texted back,

00:15:07.020 CCing me on text

00:15:08.500 to get me into this conversation.

00:15:10.300 No, we're going back.

00:15:11.100 No, you didn't.

00:15:12.240 I have no connection

00:15:13.240 to the chef at JAR independently. 1.00

00:15:15.120 I thought you were on the road, bitch. 1.00

00:15:17.200 No, I'm not talking about being invited to JAR. 1.00

00:15:19.020 I'm talking about being on the text thread

00:15:20.280 with the chef, okay?

00:15:21.320 Yeah, yeah.

00:15:23.500 Okay, this is, you know, yeah.

00:15:25.560 You know, I need direct contact.

00:15:26.980 Okay, I need to form my own relationship.

00:15:28.500 So the point is,

00:15:30.440 so it's post, I'm starving

00:15:32.380 And I'm like, I'm scared because I had two nights of room service post-show in this hotel, okay?

00:15:38.220 Night one, I order a Caesar salad and a burger with no bun, all right?

00:15:43.660 And a side of spinach, okay?

00:15:46.520 And I think that was it.

00:15:48.460 And I eat it and I'm still starving, okay?

00:15:51.280 I'm starving. 0.98

00:15:52.160 And so I go through this whole fucking thing of how am I going to get takeout past the front desk? 0.99

00:15:58.500 Who knows that I just ordered a full meal and ate it? 0.99

00:16:01.740 Oh, no. You felt shame.

00:16:04.500 I felt shame. I also felt like I feel bad for them that they're going to think I was dissatisfied by their meal.

00:16:14.000 And I'm this woman who comes down in the elevator scrambling towards the door to try to intercept my delivery.

00:16:21.740 It's just a whole thing. But I will not go hungry in the night. I mean, are you fucking kidding?

00:16:26.540 No, of course not. 0.98

00:16:27.040 And room service like ended, I think around 11 or something.

00:16:30.960 So, which I continue to say, are you a hotel if you don't serve hot food through the night?

00:16:39.320 I know.

00:16:40.120 I mean, like literally what the hell?

00:16:42.940 Like you're disempowered.

00:16:44.160 You're not at home.

00:16:44.940 Because in your home, you can get in home.

00:16:47.580 You can always get food.

00:16:48.720 Yes. And so to be in a hotel room starving with nothing but a jar of jelly beans.

00:16:54.500 Okay.

00:16:54.780 Oh no.

00:16:55.300 As though this is like, as though it's to tide you over till morning.

00:17:00.560 Like, and when, you know, check-ins at four and like, these are the food hour.

00:17:05.340 I just, anyway, so I end up going, I'm in Philly, I'll order this cheesesteak, bunless.

00:17:10.460 Okay.

00:17:10.880 So it's a series of bunless meals.

00:17:13.000 Those just folds of meat.

00:17:14.840 Yeah.

00:17:15.500 Okay. 0.99

00:17:15.960 And I order it and I just fucking head down. 0.99

00:17:20.540 Yeah. 0.99

00:17:20.800 You know?

00:17:21.140 Good girl.

00:17:21.600 Oh, the 1115 alarm goes again.

00:17:23.800 and it's sitting there and I get it and I bring it up and whatever. Fine. So night two, I'm going,

00:17:29.500 I can't go through all that again. I'm going to step up the order and I order a salad. I order

00:17:35.360 this charcuterie appetizer. I say appetizer because that's how they framed it. Okay.

00:17:40.680 Then I order the steak. I go, not fucking around tonight. And there's a question of a shrimp 0.99

00:17:46.440 cocktail happening. I'm there. Okay. And again, I'm posing that and I'm backing out and it's all

00:17:52.040 over the place on the call like just my desire is is laid bare and there's this sort of chuckling

00:17:57.660 voice on the other end that I have like you know that's just everything I need in this moment okay

00:18:02.440 it's just okay you don't have to justify it to me yeah totally sounds great okay he said he says

00:18:08.140 those words wow okay and it sounds like it's going too far but it wasn't because I because I mean I

00:18:12.880 he heard me go I mean I you know what I am gonna do something crazy I'm gonna order another salad

00:18:18.060 like a second salad

00:18:20.440 in addition 1.00

00:18:20.900 and it's a fucking salad 0.99

00:18:22.460 like you know 1.00

00:18:22.960 like whatever

00:18:23.360 but it's like

00:18:24.060 because I'm afraid

00:18:24.600 it's going to be

00:18:25.000 they're like tender baby

00:18:26.200 lettuce gems

00:18:27.100 I'm like

00:18:27.480 if this is four leaves 1.00

00:18:28.880 they were fucked 0.99

00:18:29.660 and I couldn't risk 1.00

00:18:30.760 changing salads

00:18:31.660 the Caesar was pretty hearty

00:18:33.100 yeah

00:18:33.680 if tonight I ordered

00:18:34.460 the baby gem

00:18:35.060 and it was minuscule

00:18:35.880 right

00:18:36.460 I go I should have gotten 0.59

00:18:37.180 the Caesar

00:18:37.500 so my only option was to

00:18:38.460 so I go

00:18:38.960 he goes you don't have

00:18:39.920 to justify it to me

00:18:40.620 and I go

00:18:40.860 and then I

00:18:42.080 whatever steak

00:18:42.800 the whole thing

00:18:43.320 I'm like that was great

00:18:45.100 then knock knock knock

00:18:46.760 and it opens the door

00:18:48.540 and a face just reveals

00:18:51.160 this is the man I was talking to.

00:18:54.080 Delivering the food.

00:18:55.600 Yeah.

00:18:56.260 And I go, oh no.

00:19:00.040 So the intimacy of bringing one's food

00:19:02.820 into one's room.

00:19:03.820 Okay.

00:19:03.980 I can't believe, first of all,

00:19:06.000 that it's even still,

00:19:07.360 like I think that's going to,

00:19:08.460 like they're going to,

00:19:09.220 it's going to go away.

00:19:10.160 Like a murder shall happen,

00:19:11.800 whatever it is.

00:19:12.580 It's insane that particularly a man

00:19:16.660 is going to come into my room at 11 and 30 PM. And I'm there utterly vulnerable, like nude,

00:19:24.620 you know what I mean? And it's so fucking intimate. When I was having the best 21 days 0.98

00:19:29.240 when I was at the Ludlow, which by the way, I need the Ludlow people to hear this and I'm

00:19:32.960 going to send them this episode. So I had someone in the entertainment industry say to me, I'm going

00:19:38.240 to New York. I was going to stay at the Bowery, but should I stay at the Ludlow? So I want to be

00:19:42.980 clear. The Bowery is a more expensive, more, you know, high level hotel. Because of the work we've

00:19:49.460 done promoting the Ludlow, they thought the Ludlow was preferred to the Bowery. Do you hear

00:19:55.700 what I'm saying? Yes. So this person for whom money is not an object. Right. Was going to go,

00:20:01.460 oh, I guess I'll pivot to the Ludlow. Wow. So I'm just saying that now we're going to send in the

00:20:05.260 episode and the friendly rates, which they have been lovely about. Yes. I want Skybox. They've

00:20:11.360 It's been lovely. I was supposed to stay there this week and I had to cancel.

00:20:14.080 Yeah.

00:20:14.260 Oh my God, you're not going to believe what happened to me.

00:20:15.700 What?

00:20:16.100 What?

00:20:16.600 No, it's not that big a deal, but I booked a hotel somewhere and had to cancel and then forgot and didn't cancel.

00:20:21.780 No.

00:20:22.320 And I paid $700 that I can't get back.

00:20:26.320 Oh no.

00:20:27.740 Anyway, and I go-

00:20:28.580 That's hard.

00:20:29.680 Okay, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.

00:20:31.320 I'm boring, I'm boring, but I need you to know.

00:20:33.000 So we love the Ludlow, but I'm saying when I was at the Ludlow having the best time ever.

00:20:36.420 Yes.

00:20:36.780 And the salad there, unbelievable, the kale sunchoke salad with chicken.

00:20:40.920 And I got it with shrimp.

00:20:42.080 It was exquisite.

00:20:43.060 But there were nights where I'd be fresh out of the shower, pink-cheeked, clinging the robe across my bare breast.

00:20:49.980 And in comes the room service.

00:20:52.100 And yeah, it's extremely intimate.

00:20:54.200 And also, I was staying in a teeny room.

00:20:55.980 So it's like you open the door and the bed's right there.

00:20:57.700 It's like, just throw it.

00:20:59.280 Just throw it right there.

00:21:00.480 And everyone was lovely.

00:21:01.700 It was fine.

00:21:02.160 But it is an intensely intimate exchange.

00:21:04.860 and if you know the person

00:21:07.120 that you just had

00:21:07.720 the breathy conversation

00:21:08.780 on the phone with

00:21:09.700 wrestling with food

00:21:11.200 which is of course

00:21:11.800 a deeply sensual topic

00:21:13.520 you're talking about hunger

00:21:14.940 you're talking about shame

00:21:16.240 desire

00:21:16.640 apparently erotic

00:21:17.960 taking something in

00:21:19.140 and someone's saying

00:21:19.860 no it's fine

00:21:20.700 let it happen

00:21:21.560 surrender to your desires

00:21:22.940 right

00:21:23.300 I mean technically

00:21:24.060 he could come in there

00:21:24.960 and go

00:21:25.340 you don't have to justify

00:21:26.640 anything to me

00:21:27.460 you know

00:21:28.660 or anyone in this world

00:21:29.960 okay

00:21:30.240 it just

00:21:31.040 he looked at me

00:21:31.920 with a familiarity

00:21:32.680 so I realized like

00:21:34.160 I was anticipating someone else bringing it up.

00:21:37.220 And what I realized is I'm completely comfortable

00:21:40.160 with both of those intimacies happening independently.

00:21:43.160 Okay, but combined is too much.

00:21:55.260 Hello, it's me, Anna Sinfield from The Girlfriends,

00:21:58.780 the number one hit true crime show

00:22:01.100 that puts women right in the centre of their own stories.

00:22:05.240 I'm back with more one-off interviews 1.00

00:22:07.360 with some truly kick-ass women on the Girlfriends Spotlight. 1.00

00:22:12.260 I want to introduce you to Sylvia.

00:22:14.800 I'm going to climb this.

00:22:17.160 And then there's Vaisaka.

00:22:19.300 Let's see how we can stop killing and save lives.

00:22:23.400 Leila dared to ask the question.

00:22:25.860 Is badness hereditary?

00:22:27.900 And finally, we'll meet Rosamund.

00:22:29.720 If it wasn't for the year where Ella lived,

00:22:32.840 she wouldn't have died on that fatal night.

00:22:35.800 You'll even get to meet my mum in that one,

00:22:37.500 who I can always count on to keep my feet on the ground.

00:22:40.540 I'm not too intimidated by her.

00:22:41.960 What are you talking about? 1.00

00:22:44.860 Listen to The Girlfriend Spotlight on the iHeartRadio app, 1.00

00:22:48.320 Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:22:55.200 Ever feel like you're being chased by the marriage police?

00:22:57.760 Welcome to Boys and Girls, the podcast where dating isn't dating.

00:23:03.060 It's a full-on love triathlon.

00:23:05.660 A morning what-if, an evening maybe, and a 3pm chai with a could-this-please-be-the-one.

00:23:12.560 Because in the arranged marriage universe, you're basically on a sushi conveyor belt.

00:23:16.660 And like raw fish, you've got a shelf life.

00:23:20.320 And the wild part? You're not just looking for someone you like.

00:23:23.520 You're casting for a mythical hero your entire family approves of.

00:23:27.200 a saint, a demigod, a unicorn.

00:23:30.380 I know because years ago I sacrificed myself

00:23:32.980 to this chaotic, soul-crushing tradition

00:23:35.180 hoping to find love the correct way.

00:23:38.160 Boys and Girls is our absurd, cringy, heartfelt ride 1.00

00:23:41.380 through the highs and lows of the Indian arranged marriage, 0.96

00:23:44.320 finally giving you the validation and healing you deserve.

00:23:48.600 Listen to Boys and Girls starting February 19th

00:23:51.320 on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

00:23:53.740 or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:23:55.460 This is Ryder Strong, and I have a new podcast called The Red Weather.

00:23:59.780 It was many and many a year ago in a kingdom by the sea.

00:24:04.740 In 1995, my neighbor, Anna Trainor, disappeared from a commune.

00:24:08.580 It was hard to wrap your head around.

00:24:09.900 It was nature and trees and praying and drugs.

00:24:13.540 So no, I am not your guru.

00:24:17.320 And back then, I lied to my parents.

00:24:19.940 I lied to police.

00:24:21.220 I lied to everybody.

00:24:22.200 There were years, Ryder, where I could not say your name.

00:24:24.980 I've decided to go back to my hometown in Northern California,

00:24:27.860 interview my friends, family, talk to police, journalists,

00:24:30.680 whomever I can to try to find out what actually happened.

00:24:34.020 Isn't it a little bit weird that they obsess over hippies in the woods

00:24:36.940 and not the obvious boyfriend?

00:24:38.620 They have had this case for 30 years. 0.98

00:24:41.540 I'll teach you sons of **** to come around here and my wife. 0.97

00:24:44.580 Boom, boom. 0.99

00:24:45.880 This is The Red Weather.

00:24:48.900 Listen to The Red Weather on the iHeartRadio app,

00:24:51.380 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:24:54.980 The more you listen to your kids, the closer you'll be.

00:24:59.620 So we asked kids, what do you want your parents to hear?

00:25:03.320 I feel sometimes that I'm not listened to.

00:25:06.040 I would just want you to listen to me more often

00:25:07.920 and evaluate situations with me and lead me towards success.

00:25:12.740 Listening is a form of love.

00:25:14.960 Find resources to help you support your kids

00:25:17.340 and their emotional well-being at SoundItOutTogether.org.

00:25:21.200 That's SoundItOutTogether.org.

00:25:23.700 Brought to you by the Ad Council and Pivotal.

00:25:30.860 The reason I pulled up this text thread is so I could talk about your whole thing.

00:25:35.100 Okay, okay.

00:25:35.620 Okay, here it is.

00:25:36.940 July, jar, us.

00:25:38.780 First of all, okay.

00:25:40.120 Oh, I texted you that.

00:25:41.360 Yes, okay.

00:25:42.580 Okay, just all of a sudden you.

00:25:45.300 Is it possible that my hormones have shifted or something horrible has happened?

00:25:48.420 I am suddenly gaining weight.

00:25:49.640 Like I ate so clean the last few days because of colonic.

00:25:53.820 Ordinarily, I would feel that.

00:25:55.600 A skirt I wore a month ago is too tight to wear.

00:25:57.940 Or is it simple?

00:25:59.140 I've gained a few.

00:26:00.380 Like four pounds.

00:26:02.660 I'm scared.

00:26:06.360 And my pauses are between individual texts, right?

00:26:09.460 So like four pounds.

00:26:11.080 I'm scared.

00:26:13.100 Because I know my eating and I haven't been going hard.

00:26:19.980 You're scared something's quote wrong. 1.00

00:26:22.040 you're a jackass 1.00

00:26:24.220 Kate Berlin 1.00

00:26:26.700 I get so paranoid about stomach disorders

00:26:29.200 ha ha ha

00:26:30.200 Jacqueline ha ha ha

00:26:32.180 you like suddenly I have an overproduction 0.99

00:26:34.800 or underproduction of some enzyme or some shit 0.99

00:26:37.060 me 1.00

00:26:38.580 oh my god you wish

00:26:40.140 Kate Berlin

00:26:42.680 it's probably not even five pounds

00:26:43.940 but it feels awful

00:26:45.320 the skirt not fitting is

00:26:48.260 rocking me

00:26:49.540 I go huh

00:26:52.460 Kaperlant, dressing to go to a party and sad.

00:26:55.900 I wore it a month ago.

00:26:57.000 I looked at a calendar.

00:27:02.440 I go, I mean, you're minuscule.

00:27:04.940 You have acres to gain before it's meaningful, noticeable.

00:27:09.780 Kaperlant, sure, but for me.

00:27:13.140 Me, I said you. 1.00

00:27:15.320 Kaperlant, it sucks. 1.00

00:27:19.460 Okay. 0.99

00:27:20.740 Me.

00:27:22.020 No. I mean, you normally stay the same with absolutely no conscious efforts to measure

00:27:28.200 anything. Okay. Is what I'm saying. I'm saying to mean like, anyway, and you go, exactly. Like,

00:27:34.340 I just stay. Okay. Me, welcome to the world.

00:27:42.380 You barreling ahead and I can eat out and shit. Okay. I go, welcome to my world. I go, 1.00

00:27:47.120 is my point and you what the fuck though something has all caps changed four question marks 0.98

00:27:54.460 i go working out maybe yeah like you know you're hungry or something right 0.98

00:28:00.180 and you and i've had these stomach issues lately etc what the fuck exactly that's the change 0.95

00:28:05.940 i go single 0.97

00:28:09.880 Kate Berlant

00:28:13.820 that's making me gain

00:28:14.980 seven question marks

00:28:16.100 okay

00:28:16.480 me

00:28:17.940 no sex 0.99

00:28:18.600 food in place of sex 0.92

00:28:19.580 yeah

00:28:19.820 yeah

00:28:20.440 you

00:28:21.040 I had months 0.63

00:28:22.040 no sex

00:28:22.620 it's still thin

00:28:23.520 interesting

00:28:25.700 maybe

00:28:26.580 I go

00:28:28.020 working out

00:28:28.660 and becoming ravenous

00:28:29.600 you

00:28:30.080 right

00:28:30.660 baking the batch

00:28:31.700 of brownies

00:28:32.240 for example

00:28:32.860 M dash

00:28:33.820 weird behavior

00:28:35.260 me

00:28:38.720 2,000 extra calories a week is like a pound.

00:28:43.340 You, four dinners out next week.

00:28:45.740 A house I'll become.

00:28:51.460 OMG, really?

00:28:52.660 Okay, that's easy.

00:28:53.660 I've just gained a few.

00:28:54.580 Ha ha.

00:28:55.220 Yes.

00:28:56.160 My fear was slash is that it's like, comma, medical.

00:29:02.520 An issue.

00:29:05.160 Because I ate so healthy last few days.

00:29:07.360 No drinking, et cetera.

00:29:08.720 Me, four pounds could be water weight is micro.

00:29:13.000 You, I know it's not significant.

00:29:15.060 Me, small people fluctuate like that in a day.

00:29:17.520 The average adult's weight fluctuates up to five or six pounds per day.

00:29:21.200 That was a copy and paste from Google, that second fact, by the way.

00:29:23.800 You, my waist is a square.

00:29:28.420 Okay, my waist is a square.

00:29:29.760 And then, no way.

00:29:30.600 I go, yes.

00:29:31.380 Do you weigh yourself a lot? 1.00

00:29:32.840 Sounds like you gained a few, you dumb bitch. 1.00

00:29:35.060 and you never 1.00

00:29:38.680 you never weigh yourself

00:29:40.100 all you do is

00:29:40.560 rive naked

00:29:41.140 okay 0.66

00:29:41.680 anyway you go

00:29:42.560 never

00:29:43.040 ha ha ha

00:29:43.720 cackling

00:29:44.340 I go

00:29:44.920 there's a reason

00:29:45.480 other people

00:29:46.080 measure in 62

00:29:47.300 apps

00:29:47.920 oh my god

00:29:48.640 I'm like

00:29:49.520 because it's nearly

00:29:50.200 impossible to

00:29:51.080 maintain weight

00:29:51.840 unless your life

00:29:52.440 is super regimented

00:29:53.500 in one exact way

00:29:54.400 talk to me

00:29:55.340 if you gain 30

00:29:56.160 and truly don't

00:29:56.940 know why

00:29:57.400 okay

00:29:58.820 you go

00:30:00.120 you go

00:30:00.500 totally

00:30:00.960 it's actually

00:30:01.620 so obvious

00:30:02.560 my show ended

00:30:03.200 it's that simple

00:30:03.880 lol

00:30:04.220 Oh, my God.

00:30:05.380 I'm like, yeah, most people have a range of clothes, looser and fitter for this.

00:30:09.940 Except Mr. Rogers, who's obsessed with maintaining his weight at that number, 123 or whatever the love number is.

00:30:16.280 It's so funny.

00:30:17.520 And then this is primo caperland.

00:30:20.620 What's sad is I felt so good emotionally the last few days.

00:30:24.920 I go, it's not sad.

00:30:27.420 Which I'm just going to lean into.

00:30:29.620 Oh, right.

00:30:30.260 earlier you'd said to me, you know, because I'd said like, but you were like, I was thin and I was

00:30:35.220 like, you were really stressed. You're like, yeah, I was mentally ill and so thin. And so like, I'm

00:30:40.060 like, you're mentally ill now too. He, he, he. You're like, ha, ha, ha. I'm like, you probably 1.00

00:30:43.960 look better. You're like, truth. Okay. And then I go, I got to work out. It's been a few days.

00:30:48.740 Mood is tanking. More later. So I go off to work out. I have a soaring workout with Tracy because

00:30:54.860 I'm back in LA briefly. So I'm, I'm in here. I'm with the heat and humidity. It's heaven. Okay.

00:30:58.540 I come out of my workout. I see all caps from Caperland. I'm moments from leaving house and 0.97

00:31:04.280 the button literally popped off my top when I bent down. I go, haha, send a pic. You send this pic

00:31:13.340 of you just furious in front of a mirror with the bottom button from your vest gone. Yeah.

00:31:19.940 Bionic gym arriving, apparently going to get hard on that. Okay. So this is, this is amazing.

00:31:25.720 And this, and by the way, it's really interesting because Jacqueline, as you know, I was like, we can't even talk about this on Pooh because it's like mega like eating disorder trigger.

00:31:33.860 I'm like deeply fortunate.

00:31:35.340 I've never struggled with an eating disorder.

00:31:37.200 Aside, it's when I always say just the baseline like body obsession, anorexia that everyone born into this culture has, you know.

00:31:43.400 Yes.

00:31:43.680 But it's so, it's just really, I'm just, it's so funny.

00:31:48.260 And my fear of a medical condition.

00:31:49.620 That's the thing.

00:31:50.360 I was worried.

00:31:51.340 It wasn't even like, I was truly, I was like, something is wrong.

00:31:54.580 like I've got hormone imbalance like here it comes or something so I'm reminded of what Rihanna was

00:31:59.500 saying about she was like there's my tour body there's my off tour body there's my you know and

00:32:04.100 it's like oh yeah of course like these fluctuations and I started to worry truly I was like that

00:32:08.460 something was wrong and these are micro fluctuations due to obvious lifestyle changes that are fine

00:32:15.240 and I will never and again I don't own a scale I don't play that game right but we all know that

00:32:20.040 I feel it's a deeply human just when the pants that were that felt like heaven suddenly they're painful and it it's feels unmanageable.

00:32:28.020 Well, the thing is, like what I think you and me enjoy and are sharing here is sisterly intimacy.

00:32:36.900 Yes. The the freedom with the close friend to not speak the language of the culture.

00:32:44.560 You know what I mean?

00:32:45.200 No, completely. And to be able. And again, I'm not truly thank God.

00:32:48.740 i'm not like truly struggling right this isn't like but no it's the sisterly me being able to 0.97

00:32:53.460 send you a picture of my ass and to not just fall into this hyper surveillance controlled language 0.98

00:32:58.740 of yeah well this is damaging and women shouldn't talk about their bodies this way and we shouldn't 1.00

00:33:03.040 it's like no it's completely okay to be like my skirt's tight i want to throw myself off the deck

00:33:07.760 that's just you know to try to somehow suggest that that those emotions should be eliminated

00:33:13.320 or somehow like it's just like go to hell it's like we're strong like it's like that's okay if

00:33:19.160 we can feel those things then also be fine yeah and I would argue expressing them and being able

00:33:23.040 to laugh uncontrollably at one's madness and at the sickness yes is deeply to use this overused

00:33:29.220 word healing but it is yeah anyway and I'm so and I'm so grateful to you because you freed me and

00:33:34.840 it was great and i'm like everything is is totally is totally great well to just go on the path with

00:33:43.420 like to to me it's sort of similar like like i guess what it is is like the intimacy of bitching

00:33:50.900 about your problems with a friend and those problems are small personal like it's like with

00:33:56.820 the friend you can drop all that well of course we know that you know this is all whatever you 1.00

00:34:02.540 know what i mean like you just drop the fucking shit and and get real like so it would be like 0.99

00:34:06.840 you could say to the friend that you're devastated about something that like it'd be like you know i 1.00

00:34:11.680 have a pimple i'm a fucking like hog you know what i mean like i'm disgusting i don't deserve 0.99

00:34:17.020 like to live or something like that whatever and it's like it wouldn't be like well wow what you're 0.99

00:34:22.180 saying you have your health you have it's really offensive to all women of course yeah whatever

00:34:27.260 It's so belittling. 0.97

00:34:28.540 And it's like to get real and into the specific problems of your friend,

00:34:32.680 whatever that friend's problems are.

00:34:34.340 Like if that friend's problems are like, you know, whatever,

00:34:37.660 their yacht got scratched.

00:34:38.820 I don't know.

00:34:39.440 Like, you know what I mean?

00:34:40.280 It's like you go on the emotional journey with the friend

00:34:42.560 because that's their world.

00:34:44.320 And it would be disgusting not to.

00:34:46.580 Yeah, exactly.

00:34:47.140 A scratch on the yacht, greater perspective.

00:34:49.380 But mourning the scratch on the yacht,

00:34:51.360 it's like the person still needs a friend or a close confidant to go, 0.98

00:34:55.380 fuck yeah and and because it's like it's like the dramas that are playing out in any given life 0.98

00:35:04.480 are the dramas of that day you know and I'm not and I'm like thank god I'm not when I'm texting 0.99

00:35:10.260 all this I'm not truly beside myself right this is but that is it's a yeah it's a beautiful

00:35:15.100 intimacy to share and the freedom from being medical because truly even still I'm like I was

00:35:20.200 like looking at the calendar I was like oh this is going to be like this is the week that like

00:35:23.860 something. I had some horrible stomach acid shift and then my life was permanently changed.

00:35:27.760 And I was scared. Here's why I was really scared. Because as we know, I have zero dietary,

00:35:31.420 I have no allergens or restrictions. You've been unable to locate a dietary restriction

00:35:36.480 despite efforts. Exactly. Unable to locate. And I've always been so grateful that I can really

00:35:41.880 eat anything and feel fine. I really don't. And so I was like, oh my God, is it starting? Is this

00:35:48.440 going to be the fucking turning point where it's like oh actually if I eat a lot of gluten then I'm 0.98

00:35:54.880 really struggling it's like I can't live like that so that was a lot of my concern I was like 0.98

00:35:59.200 because I don't restrict and I don't have dietary like yeah inflammation like points I was like

00:36:05.500 oh no is this is is it now I'm now joining that joining joining yeah welcome oh I can't like when 0.99

00:36:13.100 you with the pimple being like, oh, I have to think about like hurrying to wash my face after

00:36:18.260 my workout. Like what? Hello, it's me, Anna Sinfield from The Girlfriends, the number one

00:36:33.640 hit true crime show that puts women right in the center of their own stories. I'm back with more

00:36:40.460 one-off interviews with some truly kick-ass women on the girlfriend's spotlight i want to introduce 1.00

00:36:47.420 you to sylvia i'm going to climb this and then there's vasaka let's see how we can stop killing

00:36:55.520 and save lives leila dared to ask the question is badness hereditary and finally we'll meet

00:37:03.040 rosamund if it wasn't for the air where ella lived she wouldn't have died on that fatal night

00:37:09.720 You'll even get to meet my mum in that one,

00:37:11.440 who I can always count on to keep my feet on the ground.

00:37:14.480 I'm not too intimidated by her.

00:37:15.880 What are you talking about? 1.00

00:37:18.840 Listen to The Girlfriend Spotlight on the iHeartRadio app, 1.00

00:37:22.240 Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:37:29.140 Ever feel like you're being chased by the marriage police?

00:37:33.160 Welcome to Boys and Girls, the podcast where dating isn't dating.

00:37:36.740 It's a full-on love triathlon.

00:37:39.320 A morning what-if, an evening maybe, and a 3pm chai with a could-this-please-be-the-one.

00:37:46.480 Because in the arranged marriage universe, you're basically on a sushi conveyor belt.

00:37:50.640 And like raw fish, you've got a shelf life.

00:37:54.260 And the wild part? You're not just looking for someone you like.

00:37:57.580 You're casting for a mythical hero your entire family approves of.

00:38:01.280 A saint, a demigod, a unicorn.

00:38:03.600 on. I know because years ago I sacrificed myself to this chaotic, soul-crushing tradition hoping

00:38:09.560 to find love the correct way. Boys and Girls is our absurd, cringy, heartfelt ride through the

00:38:15.720 highs and lows of the Indian arranged marriage, finally giving you the validation and healing 0.96

00:38:21.140 you deserve. Listen to Boys and Girls starting February 19th on the iHeartRadio app, Apple

00:38:26.900 Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. This is Ryder Strong and I have a new podcast called

00:38:32.060 The Red Weather. It was many and many a year ago in a kingdom by the sea. In 1995, my neighbor,

00:38:40.440 Anna Trainor, disappeared from a commune. It was hard to wrap your head around. It was nature and

00:38:45.100 trees and praying and drugs. No, I am not your guru. And back then, I lied to my parents. I lied

00:38:54.240 to police. I lied to everybody. There were years right where I could not say your name. I've

00:38:59.320 decided to go back to my hometown in northern california interview my friends family talk to

00:39:03.480 police journalists whomever i can to try to find out what actually happened isn't it a little bit

00:39:08.820 weird that they obsess over hippies in the woods and not the obvious boyfriend they have had this

00:39:13.380 case for 30 years i'll teach you sons of come around here and my wife boom boom this is the

00:39:20.760 red weather listen to the red weather on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you

00:39:27.200 get your podcasts.

00:39:29.560 The more you listen to your kids, the closer you'll be.

00:39:33.560 So we asked kids, what do you want your parents to hear?

00:39:37.580 I feel sometimes that I'm not listened to.

00:39:39.880 I would just want you to listen to me more often and evaluate situations with me and

00:39:44.340 lead me towards success.

00:39:46.660 Listening is a form of love.

00:39:48.280 Find resources to help you support your kids and their emotional well-being at SoundItOutTogether.org.

00:39:54.960 That's SoundItOutTogether.org.

00:39:57.640 Brought to you by the Ad Council and Pivotal.

00:40:05.780 So we all know I was making the deep chocolate walnut.

00:40:09.520 What was that called?

00:40:10.100 Moon dreams?

00:40:10.880 God bless.

00:40:11.680 The moon juice.

00:40:12.640 Moon juice makes my favorite chia pudding, I'll say.

00:40:15.040 I went and got some yesterday.

00:40:16.300 It's unbelievable chia pudding.

00:40:17.400 And also, if you happen to be near a moon juice location, they have happy hour.

00:40:22.040 What?

00:40:22.360 every day you can go get a green juice for like half off because it's going to expire the next

00:40:26.260 day. Well, pick me up. There's one not that far. Isn't that fabulous? You can get, yesterday I got

00:40:31.720 a beautiful green juice for like, I don't know, five bucks. Fucking rules. Okay. Anyway, listen 1.00

00:40:38.300 to me here. So something that I made, this is months ago. I saw this, I didn't even know where

00:40:43.860 I was looking. I saw this article called the life-changing loaf of bread. And then it had

00:40:48.900 this picture of a beautiful, rustic looking loaf that's made with seeds, nuts. You know,

00:40:54.560 it's like a no need kind of bread. You don't have to need it. And I was like, I'm going to

00:40:58.660 fucking make it. So I did. No yeast? No. So I'm here to say it's fucking beautiful. I will be 0.98

00:41:03.680 posting the recipe on Pug, of course, along with photos of myself making it. Now listen to me,

00:41:09.000 I'm going to read you the ingredients. So you put in sunflower seeds, flax seeds,

00:41:13.160 hazelnuts or almonds or any nut.

00:41:14.700 Oh my God.

00:41:15.180 Some oats, some chia seeds, psyllium husk,

00:41:18.380 some salt, one tablespoon of maple syrup.

00:41:20.840 You do some melted coconut oil or ghee.

00:41:23.340 That's all.

00:41:23.960 You mix it in a loaf pan. 1.00

00:41:25.100 You put it in the fucking oven. 1.00

00:41:26.600 It's so simple. 1.00

00:41:28.540 And I have to say rustic, gorgeous,

00:41:31.200 high fiber, high nutrition.

00:41:32.780 How much oats?

00:41:33.480 I knew that was me.

00:41:34.260 You're concerned.

00:41:37.880 A cup and a half.

00:41:39.440 Of any oats?

00:41:40.760 I mean, this says rolled oats.

00:41:42.020 Yeah.

00:41:42.440 Right.

00:41:42.740 Okay, so oats, oats, like those.

00:41:45.000 Quaker.

00:41:45.360 I did a glyphosate.

00:41:46.700 Interesting.

00:41:47.700 You got to be careful when you bake with psyllium husk, if I'm correct.

00:41:50.980 Really?

00:41:51.340 It can turn things purple if you don't get the right kind or something.

00:41:55.600 This is like an old keto thing.

00:41:57.240 Well, I use psyllium husk powder, but I just want to say I'm going to post photos of the bread.

00:42:01.600 I'm probably now going to make this bread for the rest of my life.

00:42:04.960 I instantly flashed to myself in my 80s a consistency across all life.

00:42:08.880 And it's really beautiful.

00:42:10.700 And, you know, I have some in the freezer.

00:42:13.200 I've been enjoying it in the morning with some avocado on it.

00:42:16.220 Absolutely sublime, beautiful, and makes you feel like you're in the renaissance.

00:42:20.960 Girl with the pearl earring level.

00:42:23.220 Yeah.

00:42:24.220 Vermeer.

00:42:25.300 Instantly Vermeer.

00:42:26.400 Light pouring through.

00:42:28.040 I read that book, that like historical fiction book.

00:42:31.460 Oh, right.

00:42:31.960 It was the girl with the pearl earring was also the name of the book.

00:42:34.340 It's not her.

00:42:36.000 Look at me blasting my nose with Leemar intrigue.

00:42:38.460 Very cool.

00:42:38.960 I'm blasting under the eye, continuing to twitch.

00:42:41.540 If my eye is twitching tomorrow, I'm texting my doctor, I decided. 1.00

00:42:44.780 You're pathetic. 1.00

00:42:45.780 Jacqueline, it's been a month. 1.00

00:42:47.300 A month of under the eye flutter?

00:42:49.180 Not a twitch, a flutter under the eye, involuntary spasms for a month.

00:42:53.880 I mean, what, all day, every day?

00:42:55.600 Not all day, but consistently throughout the day.

00:42:58.540 The last time I remember, I had an eye twitch that wasn't like this,

00:43:01.840 because they do say stress can bring it on.

00:43:03.800 They sure do.

00:43:04.540 And sure, there's been emotional stresses, of course.

00:43:07.080 And I remember the last time, not to be too Hollywood about it,

00:43:10.460 but I had an iTwitch leading up to when I was taping my special in 2019.

00:43:14.120 Yeah.

00:43:14.700 And I was like, okay, well, I guess there is like emotional stress

00:43:17.220 that's causing this, like that maybe I'm not fully.

00:43:20.760 You know what's fascinating?

00:43:22.060 That we actually do have a subconscious.

00:43:24.200 This is what I'm starting to realize.

00:43:25.580 You could text your daughter or get off a caffeine.

00:43:27.440 No, just that my brazen attitudes that I know myself,

00:43:30.560 like shadow stuff, subconscious, I know it.

00:43:32.640 no, Kate, there are things that you do that you actually cannot understand. Like the arrogance

00:43:38.560 of my belief that I somehow have knowledge of my own subconscious. And this is what my life

00:43:43.900 is about right now is actually mining that material. Like the eye twitch, right? Oh,

00:43:47.640 there could be subconscious. There could be material that I'm sifting through on a level

00:43:52.680 that I can't consciously acknowledge. And my brazen attitude that I know what's going on.

00:43:59.720 No, no, no.

00:44:00.400 That I know myself?

00:44:01.060 By knowing the word subconscious.

00:44:03.320 Yeah.

00:44:03.640 You think because you sign up for Jungian therapy

00:44:06.740 and you think because you're familiar

00:44:08.300 and accept the fact that like,

00:44:10.560 yeah, this is the thing you're like,

00:44:11.940 well, clearly it's an unconscious,

00:44:13.600 like clearly it's my unconscious

00:44:14.880 or my subconscious desire to,

00:44:17.080 that was like the Freud-Jung distinction, I think.

00:44:19.060 Freud said unconscious.

00:44:20.440 Jung said subconscious, I think,

00:44:22.460 because it's like down there and it's conscious.

00:44:24.860 It's not conscious.

00:44:25.840 It's just subconsciousness, right?

00:44:28.300 But it was like, yeah,

00:44:29.480 like we always think like oops that was clearly like or clearly like unconsciously i was uh like

00:44:34.840 didn't want him to come over and so you know and it's like you knew you didn't want to go over like

00:44:38.840 like if it's truly the shadow you cannot see that which you do not wish to see you do not see so

00:44:46.840 exactly i mean the only dignity around that is to acknowledge that there's unconscious stuff

00:44:50.900 the moment that you try to go like i know what it is and here's what it is you've made yourself a 0.78

00:44:57.100 fool because you're doing what cannot be done no and i've lived i've operated in that i've been 0.95

00:45:03.440 like no i know the issues i know the stuff i know the shadow stuff i know the stuff lurking and it's 1.00

00:45:08.700 like we move through our lives and there is shit that we fucking cannot see that is our behavior 0.63

00:45:14.300 is structured around right it's fascinating anyway so i'm trying to kind of get into that 0.97

00:45:18.680 stuff and the eye twitch could be due to subconscious material that i have not allowed

00:45:23.000 to surface

00:45:24.340 to the conscious

00:45:25.100 I dreamt of an owl

00:45:27.900 ooh

00:45:28.740 yeah

00:45:30.300 this is good

00:45:30.900 because

00:45:31.220 I think it had a

00:45:31.900 are you ready

00:45:32.440 third eye

00:45:33.080 my dreams have been

00:45:35.400 my dream journaling

00:45:37.960 now in the morning

00:45:38.640 they're so much longer

00:45:40.120 the density of the dreams

00:45:41.680 interesting

00:45:42.460 anyway

00:45:43.080 yeah

00:45:43.620 no I just

00:45:44.420 I wanted to say

00:45:45.220 I'm gonna have to

00:45:45.980 so my Lima

00:45:46.720 almost went missing

00:45:47.980 six times

00:45:48.680 during this trip

00:45:49.380 and I've decided 0.99

00:45:51.260 I cannot fuck around 0.99

00:45:52.600 You still have the sticker on it, I see. 0.99

00:45:54.700 Interesting.

00:45:55.240 I guess I just want to preserve the feeling of it being new. 0.90

00:45:58.600 Maybe I should take it off so no one fucking steals it, sees what it is. 0.84

00:46:04.340 I just found it this morning outside. 0.98

00:46:06.660 No.

00:46:06.960 I left it there because I try to bring it with me everywhere.

00:46:09.600 So I go, I'm going to go outside for a few hours.

00:46:11.620 Might as well grab the Lima.

00:46:12.640 You know, like I do that.

00:46:13.940 So I find it under my patio table lying there.

00:46:18.080 And I have to get serious about this.

00:46:20.040 I'm sure I've brought this up before, but with all of my devices or small items, I'm

00:46:25.020 going to get a huge feather boa in a bright color and I'm going to glue it to the edge.

00:46:32.140 The Lima?

00:46:33.020 So for example, the Lima will have a five foot feather boa attached to it.

00:46:37.400 Got it.

00:46:38.840 My phone needs it.

00:46:39.980 You'll never lose it.

00:46:40.680 Never lose it.

00:46:41.240 I need to be able to glance across a room and have a huge bright color.

00:46:46.060 I cannot operate with small items like this.

00:46:48.700 Yeah.

00:46:48.900 I got off the plane.

00:46:50.760 I decided to do one of those like quick checks.

00:46:52.940 Okay.

00:46:53.200 Like just glance back at my seat to see if there was anything left by.

00:46:56.440 Oh no.

00:46:57.100 Black pouch with every hard drive of everything I've ever digitized in my life.

00:47:02.360 Yeah.

00:47:03.000 Yeah.

00:47:03.200 The contents of every computer and it was there and I grabbed it.

00:47:06.960 Oh my God.

00:47:09.160 Because I decided I was going to go through all footage on a single plane ride.

00:47:13.740 Oh Christ.

00:47:15.120 So feather boa for the community.

00:47:16.880 I thought that was a huge tip.

00:47:18.260 It's on boa.

00:47:18.900 Oh, yeah. Phone boa.

00:47:20.480 Wow.

00:47:21.580 Oh, my neck has gone. My neck is gone.

00:47:25.180 I've decided. It's hit.

00:47:26.720 Jacqueline texted me today. The neck is gone.

00:47:28.720 And I said, no.

00:47:29.400 There's just no way to really protect it. 0.90

00:47:31.200 The skin is too fucking thin down there. 0.82

00:47:33.520 Yeah. 0.97

00:47:36.280 Oh, there's more. 0.99

00:47:37.300 I'm on a fucking serious product. 0.98

00:47:41.040 I have new serious product rabid interests right now. 0.99

00:47:45.420 What?

00:47:45.580 Okay.

00:47:45.860 Let's see.

00:47:46.660 So I was on Violet Grants.

00:47:48.060 By the way, you were going to report back about the stem cells that you're using topically and

00:47:51.800 that you like them and I want them now. Well, I sent you a couple of photos throughout the week

00:47:56.040 going through. Yeah. You looked airbrushed at the airport. When a product works-

00:48:00.100 Eye twitching beyond. It is shocking. Shocking.

00:48:03.120 When it is a notable difference, a notable- Now I'm not just talking about the difference between

00:48:08.840 my skin before a moisturizer and after it 10 minutes later, which I hate nothing more than

00:48:14.460 when you're reading the skincare promises

00:48:16.080 and it says 85% of users felt skin looked more hydrated,

00:48:20.360 plump and da-da-da.

00:48:21.080 And I'm like, yeah, after they put it on.

00:48:23.260 You know what I mean?

00:48:23.700 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:48:24.240 Like literally after they put it on.

00:48:25.700 I'm like, that counts.

00:48:27.100 It's like-

00:48:28.100 Wait, so wait, but Jacqueline, Jacqueline,

00:48:29.760 I need the stem cells.

00:48:31.960 I mean, before I go down the path,

00:48:35.640 I need to do a little research about,

00:48:38.180 there's plant stem cells.

00:48:39.540 So it's a question.

00:48:40.600 Are those anything?

00:48:42.020 The plant ones?

00:48:43.080 Plant-based.

00:48:43.640 Do I have to go down this thing of, you know, okay, they get them from the sheep that they're taking the wool from. 0.99

00:48:49.320 And a lot of people think the wool industry itself is fucked. 0.84

00:48:52.160 So just the fact that they're these wool sheep that after they died or whatever, you know, I don't know. 0.98

00:48:57.360 I don't know.

00:48:57.760 I don't know the answer.

00:48:58.740 All I know is the material that I got, the serum I got at my facialist that was said to be stem cell.

00:49:06.040 I used it throughout the week and it's doing something.

00:49:10.360 I noticed that BR has one.

00:49:12.120 It says placenta.

00:49:13.000 I'm sure.

00:49:13.640 To see results in a week

00:49:15.640 Yeah

00:49:16.020 Whoa

00:49:16.660 That is not a joke

00:49:18.100 I put it in the

00:49:18.780 Mini bar fridge

00:49:20.400 When I'd arrive

00:49:21.340 At a hotel

00:49:22.520 The serum

00:49:23.380 And then

00:49:24.340 This rose water

00:49:25.640 Serum

00:49:26.520 Like mix

00:49:27.680 And

00:49:28.960 I'd leave it in there

00:49:30.200 So it was nice and cool

00:49:31.120 And apparently

00:49:33.220 Like you know

00:49:33.880 You're not supposed to get it super hot

00:49:35.360 It's like

00:49:35.660 Kind of like an item

00:49:36.480 You'd ideally refrigerate

00:49:37.860 But obviously

00:49:38.300 You're going to travel with it

00:49:39.220 Whatever

00:49:39.500 You're reminding me

00:49:40.440 I need to buy more

00:49:41.560 Sheet masks for

00:49:42.580 travel to have it in the fridge nothing better yeah tucking it into the mini bar that is the

00:49:48.880 ultimate by the way because i'm going to be traveling yeah for about a month not bringing

00:49:53.360 the lima already decided not doing that not bringing my zip like it's not what it's about

00:49:57.300 no because it's like okay like 21 days like no no i'm not gonna and i'm trying to really be

00:50:02.660 diligent about not packing too heavy right you know what's coming gua sha under some sheet masks

00:50:07.560 and then I'll just do it.

00:50:08.740 I heard from someone

00:50:09.800 that they went to Kosha Spa

00:50:11.540 based on,

00:50:12.520 I was talking about it on POOG

00:50:14.100 and I was like,

00:50:15.540 what?

00:50:16.060 Because I can't get an appointment.

00:50:18.960 You know,

00:50:20.400 like I just want to go

00:50:21.520 and they said it was amazing.

00:50:22.800 Yeah.

00:50:23.000 I looked,

00:50:23.320 I tried to get an appointment

00:50:24.000 and it's like put in your date

00:50:25.100 and then it's like today,

00:50:25.860 tomorrow and nothing,

00:50:26.880 nothing,

00:50:27.200 nothing,

00:50:27.540 nothing,

00:50:27.860 nothing.

00:50:28.560 I want it.

00:50:29.120 I need,

00:50:29.620 I'm going to go to Face Gym

00:50:30.700 to collect that free facial soon.

00:50:33.080 I booked a facial

00:50:34.120 with Sunday skincare

00:50:35.020 in New York,

00:50:35.760 whom I love.

00:50:36.880 Right.

00:50:37.020 microcurrent. You just keep texting me the word microcurrent recently. Why are you so convinced

00:50:42.460 that's it? So I used to do microcurrent religiously every four weeks. With the

00:50:46.620 facialist. Pandemic with Lori. Pandemic ended everything. Right. And my mother also religious

00:50:52.440 microcurrent. But how often would you be doing it? Once every couple months? Once a month.

00:50:56.540 Every four weeks. Boom. I just think if it's stimulating muscle, I don't know. I just think

00:51:01.380 zipping every day for three minutes would probably be as good. I don't think so. Well, interesting.

00:51:05.000 as good yeah i gotta get the zip back out the zip is real like to me that's like working out

00:51:09.500 once a month working out really hard once a month no i think it's real i think it really

00:51:13.900 every two weeks i think the the most i saw um who was it i think it's lacey phillips i saw

00:51:19.960 her being like i get microcurrent every two weeks and i was like well damn that's a luxury that's 1.00

00:51:25.580 nice you sent me something with with the tens pads like you sent me like a bionic gym face 0.92

00:51:31.420 thing that looked interesting. It was like

00:51:33.300 buying a gym for the face. Oh, yeah. M-Face.

00:51:35.860 Yeah. And I was like, how do we get M-Face?

00:51:37.820 I actually messaged them and

00:51:39.440 I said, could Jacqueline Novak and I come

00:51:41.420 in for M-Face and we'll discuss it on the

00:51:43.060 podcast. Oh, my God. Let's see

00:51:45.380 if they responded. Can you imagine

00:51:47.320 if they had? Well, I think we might

00:51:49.100 take a trip to our

00:51:51.320 old friends at CL Spa where they

00:51:53.140 have Biologique Recherche products.

00:51:55.380 I might try to get back in there.

00:51:57.520 They treated us very well.

00:51:59.680 I really enjoyed the BR facial

00:52:01.760 Did you get the facial that day?

00:52:03.200 Oh, yeah.

00:52:04.300 We went and they laid down like that cheesecloth on your face.

00:52:09.300 And then they paint this mask on, the BR mask.

00:52:12.080 Then it sort of sets and then they lift it off by lifting off the cheesecloth kind of, right?

00:52:18.340 Does that not ring familiar?

00:52:20.600 I don't know.

00:52:22.000 Not exactly.

00:52:24.860 There's salsa on my blanket.

00:52:26.420 It's finally happened.

00:52:27.520 My white throw that I use on my couch.

00:52:29.520 You spilled?

00:52:30.280 Yeah, last night.

00:52:31.060 Yeah.

00:52:31.380 the darkest salsa you could imagine just peppers that have just the darkest peppers ground into

00:52:36.960 them and and um poblano and and it just i'm still never so happy as i am when it's time to eat and

00:52:47.780 watch tv it just continues it's the gift that keeps on giving the best and then like what else

00:52:54.480 am i i've been adding something else magnesium i've been doing oh yeah um colostrum i started

00:53:01.120 yesterday convinced

00:53:02.360 it'll save the neck

00:53:04.100 in your mouth or on

00:53:05.140 your face in the mouth

00:53:06.560 supplement yeah

00:53:08.120 that's how they were

00:53:09.140 pitching it and Lima

00:53:10.560 does have a supplement

00:53:11.400 that we would like to

00:53:12.520 try didn't they say

00:53:13.520 they were going to

00:53:13.920 send the supplement

00:53:14.520 yeah and yet

00:53:15.540 mailbox empty

00:53:17.020 interesting let this

00:53:18.680 be a warning

00:53:19.180 certainly

00:53:19.840 a warning

00:53:21.620 oh you know it's

00:53:23.980 you know what I

00:53:24.540 paid to get my teeth

00:53:25.280 whitened in office

00:53:26.360 and then follow up

00:53:27.460 each day with like

00:53:28.300 10 days of doing

00:53:29.520 it yeah how's the

00:53:30.200 pain

00:53:30.640 I literally like couldn't take it

00:53:33.280 And so I'm sitting here with my 10 day kit

00:53:35.260 Which you're supposed to use immediately

00:53:36.620 Because of the pain 0.54

00:53:37.360 Because of the sensitivity and the zingers

00:53:39.680 Terrible

00:53:40.920 I hate it

00:53:42.040 I hate the feeling

00:53:43.220 You can't do that

00:53:43.840 It's horrible

00:53:45.100 So I don't know

00:53:45.840 It's just going to have to be

00:53:46.880 The teeth are what the teeth are maybe

00:53:48.380 The teeth are what the teeth are

00:53:49.520 You know what

00:53:49.860 Why the hell isn't there a little paint on

00:53:52.060 A little paint on white tooth

00:53:54.320 Like makeup for the tooth

00:53:55.480 Like white out

00:53:55.960 Yeah

00:53:56.320 That even just lasts a single night

00:53:58.300 I know they have like

00:53:59.180 You occasionally see like

00:54:00.220 they're like teeth right now wait this is reminding me i had a friend who i watched her

00:54:04.360 get ready one night and she brushed her teeth with this special toothpaste it turns your mouth like

00:54:08.580 black and it's supposed to offer like a temporary white it's not charcoal i'm gonna find out it's

00:54:14.300 not the charcoal toothpaste it's charcoal but it's something else it's like a interesting it's

00:54:18.320 more medical really and it does it for the night yeah it's like not promising long-lasting results

00:54:23.640 great because we shouldn't have to drink coffee through a straw no of course you know no they're

00:54:29.920 like don't eat anything that stains your teeth like blueberries or coffee and i'm like well

00:54:33.640 there goes my life yeah absolutely i'm not giving up blueberries for that okay we gotta go all right

00:54:39.920 love you okay love you that was poog if you enjoyed poog please subscribe rate and review

00:54:48.880 if not we will press charges

00:54:51.060 the din of vancouver hags who will join me at what many have called my spiritual and artistic

00:55:05.240 wedding in new york city at town hall june 8th and 9th for the taping of get on your knees

00:55:12.460 tickets are for purchase at jokesnovak.com j-o-k-e-s-n-o-v-a-k dot com

00:55:22.520 when you feel uncomfortable what do you put on biggie you put on biggie when you feel

00:55:28.820 uncomfortable because i want to get confident this is dj hester prince music is therapy

00:55:32.700 a new podcast from me a dj and licensed therapist 12 months 12 areas of your life

00:55:39.160 money, love, career, confidence.

00:55:41.820 This isn't just a podcast.

00:55:43.420 It's unconventional therapy for your entire year.

00:55:47.120 Listen to DJ Hester-Prince's Music is Therapy

00:55:49.480 on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

00:55:52.160 or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:55:53.920 This is Ryder Strong,

00:55:55.400 and I have a new podcast called The Red Weather.

00:55:57.860 In 1995, my neighbor, Anna Traynor,

00:56:00.400 disappeared from a commune.

00:56:01.800 It was nature and trees and praying and drugs.

00:56:05.100 So no, I am not your guru.

00:56:09.160 And back then, I lied to everybody.

00:56:11.560 They have had this case for 30 years.

00:56:14.480 I'm going back to my hometown to uncover the truth.

00:56:18.060 Listen to The Red Weather on the iHeartRadio app,

00:56:20.640 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:56:24.580 You know Roald Dahl.

00:56:25.940 He thought up Willy Wonka and the BFG.

00:56:28.600 But did you know he was a spy?

00:56:30.920 In the new podcast, The Secret World of Roald Dahl,

00:56:33.840 I'll tell you that story and much, much more.

00:56:36.740 What?

00:56:37.580 You probably won't believe it either.

00:56:39.160 Was this before he wrote his stories?

00:56:41.020 It must have been.

00:56:42.500 Okay, I don't think that's true.

00:56:44.400 I'm telling you, I was a spy.

00:56:47.280 Listen to The Secret World of Roald Dahl

00:56:49.260 on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

00:56:51.940 or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:56:54.320 The more you listen to your kids, the closer you'll be.

00:56:58.260 So we asked kids, what do you want your parents to hear?

00:57:02.300 I feel sometimes that I'm not listened to.

00:57:04.580 I would just want you to listen to me more often

00:57:06.560 and evaluate situations with me

00:57:08.620 and lead me towards success.

00:57:11.380 Listening is a form of love.

00:57:13.600 Find resources to help you support your kids

00:57:15.980 and their emotional well-being

00:57:17.680 at SoundItOutTogether.org.

00:57:19.820 That's SoundItOutTogether.org.

00:57:22.340 Brought to you by the Ad Council and Pivotal.

00:57:24.260 This is an iHeart Podcast.

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Poog with Kate Berlant and Jacqueline Novak - May 30, 2023

Scratch on the Yacht

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